Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend pretended to be reading braille while touching...

By annababyyyy - 10/11/2014 05:01 - United States - Rockville

Today, my boyfriend pretended to be reading braille while touching my chest acne. FML

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vote type 1 7 484

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By Anonymous - 20/11/2015 19:48 - United States

Today, I woke up next to my boyfriend. He gazed at me, stroked my cheek, and said, "Christ, you really need something for this acne." FML

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By amber - 19/04/2012 18:00 - United States - Saint Paul

Today, my boyfriend gave me acne cream for my birthday. FML

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A little higher, dude

By Anonymous - 04/04/2022 14:00

Today, I was laying in bed with my boyfriend. He started caressing me, his eyes were closed, and he said, “I love touching your boobs.” Which was actually a roll of fat on my stomach. FML

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By tooembarrassed - 12/02/2016 15:13 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I was cuddling with the man I've been seeing, and he started caressing the mammoth of all pimples on my back. He continued fondling me while lecturing me on the dangers of skin cancer. FML

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By RazorBumps - 16/12/2009 05:15 - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me why I have "crotch acne". When I attempted to explain that I have razor bumps from shaving, he got mad and said I was lying and insecure about my obvious facial and bodily acne problem. FML

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By omgboobs - 23/12/2009 02:34 - United States

Today, my boyfriend told me that when my nipples are hard, he thinks that they look like giant zits, and when he squeezes them, he imagines them popping pus. He then reached for my chest. FML

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Woof woof

By kjdhfakjs - 20/05/2010 18:32 - United States

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he started pretending he was a dog. This included barking, licking my face, and scratching his ears. FML

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By again? - 15/03/2016 10:03 - United States - Olympia

Today, while making love to my boyfriend, I noticed that instead of looking at me, he was admiring himself in the mirror. FML

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thesmeagol 22

Monday 10 November 2014 17:08

Did it by chance say '**** off'?

spoo 24

Monday 10 November 2014 17:08

Well, what did it say?

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MamiMasiaa 2

Tuesday 30 December 2014 23:34

?????

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, my dad's face flushed when I introduced him to my new boyfriend. I live in a small town, and it turns out my dad recognized him. He's the secret child from an affair two decades ago. He's my half-brother. FML

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Today, my brother thought jumping out and punching me in the stomach would cure my hiccups. Yeah. Didn't work. FML

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Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML

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Today, the girl I was going to hook up with took off her clothes and revealed she had an absolutely disturbing tattoo of a rotting zombie head on her lower stomach and groin, the idea being that during sex my penis would look like it was in the zombie's mouth. I couldn’t go through with it. FML

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Today, I got my new smartwatch that I ordered for myself on the promise that I would use it for tracking my new exercise routine. Instead, I used it for playing Pong whilst eating cake and drinking wine. FML

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Today, a licensed child psychologist with 20 years of experience threw my son out after his first appointment, with the immortal line, “You must be taking the piss, there’s a church in town, you’re gonna need their help more than mine.” He’s probably right. FML

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A little higher, dude

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