To-Do List Blues By FML Approved - 08/10/2017 21:00 So much to do, so little desire... I agree, your life sucks 442 You deserved it 110 Share Tweet Share
Today, I thought I heard my little sister playing on my brand new grand piano. Angry, I ran downstairs to stop her. My parents were having sex. On my piano. FML I agree, your life sucks 321 743 You deserved it 23 042
Today, I walked over to join a group of friends and heard them talking about how hot some guy was but how ugly his sister was. I asked who they were talking about and there was an awkward silence, they hadn't realized I was there. Apparently, they were talking about my brother. FML I agree, your life sucks 54 958 You deserved it 3 272
Today, it's my 21st birthday. All my friends and family said they were busy so I figured I was getting a surprise party. Nope. They all were actually busy. I spent my birthday alone. FML I agree, your life sucks 53 124 You deserved it 4 341
Today, a local liquor store gave me a holiday gift for being such a great customer. They're not the first ones to do so. FML I agree, your life sucks 362 You deserved it 972
Today, I learned the hard way that you should never use medical tape to secure gauze over a razor cut on your scrotum. FML I agree, your life sucks 10 180 You deserved it 39 886
Today, I needed the toilet in the night. Walking through my pitch black house barefoot, I felt something squish beneath my heel. Thinking it was a morsel of previously dropped food, I turned on the light to clean it up. My eyes met a twitching gecko body, with a flattened, exploded head. FML I agree, your life sucks 15 693 You deserved it 1 406