Money, Capitalism Miscellaneous Thick as thieves

Thick as thieves

blovesg - 07/04/2009 00:41 - United States

Today, I was at the mall shoplifting when a girl who looked my age pointed to a shirt I had in my bag. "Stole that, huh?" she asked smiling. She looked pretty cool, so I nodded and asked if she stole the jeans she was wearing, which were from the same store. Turns out she didn't, she's the manager. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Bucks9 - 07/05/2009 23:43 - United States

Today, I was shopping in the mall. A cute store worker kept checking me out, so after I picked a few things I went up to her and started flirting. After a few seconds, she cut me off and said, "Actually I was watching you because you look like someone who would shoplift." FML

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disciplinaryaction - 21/11/2011 07:02 - United States

Today, a woman and her daughter came into the store I work at. The girl placed a pair of underpants on the counter, and confessed she had stolen them earlier. Assuming she had already heard a lecture, I simply thanked her for bringing them back. Her mom yelled at me for not yelling at her. FML

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J'accuse !

Anonymous - 10/08/2010 21:34 - United States

Today, I was shopping at a store from which I had previously bought a shirt. The clerk accused me of trying to steal my own shirt and called security. They examined it and argued with me for so long I was late to work. FML

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Stars of CCTV

Stfu lil brat smh - 26/03/2024 05:00 - United States

Today, while I was shopping, I spotted a lady who had the last of an item I wanted in her cart. She went off to the dressing room, so seeing my opportunity, I went and grabbed it from her cart, and put it in mine. I hadn't noticed her bratty-ass daughter next to the cart, who then yelled, “I saw that! Mommy! Some lady's stealing from your cart!” FML

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Are you new?

Anonymous - 28/06/2012 02:28 - United States - Lakewood

Today, while walking around the local thrift store, I noticed an attractive guy watching me and following me through the aisles. As he followed me to my car I was sure I would get his number. He then asks me to bring my purse inside as I had been tagged as a shoplifter. I work at the store. FML

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what_the_hell - 20/06/2013 08:35 - Finland - Helsinki

Today, while bagging my groceries at a store, a lady came over to me, took a good look at the food I'd bought, picked out an item and put it in her bag. When I confronted her, she called security on me and told them I wanted to steal her stuff. I got thrown out and she walked away with a smirk. FML

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Snitched

Anonymous - 10/02/2024 21:00

Today, I caught a grubby, evil-smelling, foul-mouthed woman blatantly shoplifting by stuffing electronics into her coat pockets, so I detained her and called the police. Less than an hour later I was fired. She was the shop owner's mother and “had permission” to just take stuff. FML

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disappointment son - 19/05/2017 12:00

Today, I caught and kicked a shoplifter out of my store. The shoplifter was my mom. FML

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Jedi mind trick

Anonymous - 12/04/2018 19:00

Today, while covering lunch for the self-checkout host, I noticed a customer walking away. I smiled and said, "Have a nice night!" A few minutes later, I saw that she'd left without paying on her machine. I'd smiled and waved at a lady as she stole from me. FML

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It's not what you think

Shopper - - United States

Today, I was shopping with a friend. We snuck into the same fitting room so we could give our opinions on each other's clothes. The suspicious saleswoman knocked on the door and asked how many people were in our room. I quickly answered, "It's OK. She's just watching." FML

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Endymion_fml 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 9:47

You deserved that one hundred percent, you thieving bastard.

PhoenixLE 0

Tuesday 7 April 2009 9:47

You're a moron. YDI.

jimmy0332 0

Wednesday 2 March 2011 2:44

YDI for getting caught

Rainbow_dumpster 28

Wednesday 2 March 2011 20:41

YDI x ∞ Klepto.

LoveHyukkieee 0

Wednesday 16 March 2011 7:36

Moron.

Blondiebee88 0

Thursday 24 March 2011 2:15

Really? Shoplifting? Making it obvious for people to see the stuff? AND bragging about it? someone should have kicked your dad off your mom while conceiving, cause you are obviously not worth the air you breathe.

Tahu424 0

Thursday 24 March 2011 21:44

Wow, words cannot describe the level of fail you have just reached.

vlcardenx3 0

Sunday 27 March 2011 23:55

ydi for being an idiot karmas a bitch

nickii530 0

Tuesday 29 March 2011 3:29

karma baby! that's what you get for stealing people's merchandise!

ranger159 6

Friday 1 April 2011 23:14

Now class, now we see what happens when you're an idiot

robotiick 12

Saturday 2 April 2011 15:13

just buy the ******* jeans ass hole if u shop lift u can go to jail retard YDI 10000000000000000% I hope u get butt ****** next time u shoplift n go to jail