That's more than I asked for By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States Today, while my teacher was helping me with a problem, the gum he was chewing fell from his mouth and down my shirt. FML I agree, your life sucks 47 607 You deserved it 4 828 Share Tweet Share
Today, I was on my way to college when I got in a car wreck with none other than my professor. My car was totaled and couldn't drive, but his could so I missed class, but he still made it. The end result? He marked me as an "unexcused absence" and gave me a zero. The accident was his fault. FML I agree, your life sucks 8 956 You deserved it 635
Today, my friend was telling me about her issues with her boyfriend, and I said, "Damn, that sounds just like a couple I know!" She asked me who, which is when I realised I was actually thinking about Davide and Ekin-Su on Love Island. FML I agree, your life sucks 216 You deserved it 841
Today, working in a department store, I spent at least 30 minutes helping a verbally abusive elderly woman in a wheelchair find an appropriate jacket for winter. She finally asked me to retrieve one she wanted in her size. When I returned she was in deep sleep, snoring and all. FML I agree, your life sucks 39 617 You deserved it 3 058
Today, I begged the people at my new job not to call my current boss for a reference because he is a vindictive dog shite. They called him for a reference, he tanked me, they believed him and withdrew my job offer. My boss also sacked me for disloyalty, thus proving he’s a vindictive dog shite. FML I agree, your life sucks 414 You deserved it 98
Today, I spent two hours trying to catch a urine sample whilst at urgent care due to my inability to pee in public restrooms. I finally managed one, and was so excited by my success that I fumbled it and spilled it on my pants. FML I agree, your life sucks 12 053 You deserved it 2 557
Today, I had a performance evaluation meeting with my boss. He told me I was the best in my department, and that the productivity has never been higher before I started working here. Oh, and he said that because everything is working so well, they don't need me as much, so he's cutting my hours. FML I agree, your life sucks 59 305 You deserved it 2 779
well he didnt reach and grab it did he?
use it to tape your cleavage shut