Ninjas are everywhere By Nancy - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States Today, I came home and noticed that sometime while I was at school, someone had cut off half of my ponytail. FML agreeclassic 45 635 vote type 1 4 598 Share Tweet Share
Today, I broke a glass case containing my pet scorpions. I still can't find them. FML agreeclassic 31 663 vote type 1 16 490
Today, I have a 20-page essay due at 11. I'm only at 6 pages. I couldn't do it last week because of final exams. Got COVID on Monday (tested positive on Tuesday), so I was out of commission for three days. Now I won't even be able to see my families for Christmas. Fuck university. I'm so tired. FML agreeclassic 367 vote type 1 431
Today, I was taking out the trash and I came upon a bill from a veterinary hospital. It was for $50 and it was a bill to put my dog down. My Dad said my dog was missing and I put hundreds of signs around the city. FML agreeclassic 68 912 vote type 1 2 925
Today, at a wedding reception, I accidentally caught the bouquet. I got cussed out by the women who were fighting over it for being uninvited and party crashing. I'm a busgirl and the bouquet only landed on the tray I was holding. FML agreeclassic 4 253 vote type 1 234
Today, I'm a 46 year-old woman who hates online dating, and who is now single again. FML agreeclassic 428 vote type 1 203
Today, I thought it'd be funny to give my younger brother a wedgie. I found the thong I thought I'd lost. FML agreeclassic 1 750 vote type 1 439
I find it funnier that no one else noticed or said something...friends much?
hahaha find out who that was and have retribution!