Kids, Vacation, Pranks Holidays Merde alors !

Merde alors !

Anonymous - 06/05/2011 19:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I went on a long overdue vacation to France with my husband and young daughter. As revenge for an earlier prank, my sister has apparently taught my daughter to swear profusely in French. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Keeping it in the family

Anonymous - 30/10/2022 12:00

Today, I discovered that my husband's recent business trip to France was actually a filthy holiday in Blackpool with my sister. FML

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French - 24/10/2013 12:52 - Australia - Saint Kilda

Today, I taught my girlfriend some French. She then used her newfound language to break up with me. FML

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Not now!

Anonymous - 29/12/2021 02:01

Today, on my long-awaited vacation, I got a phone call from my sister. Her childhood friend died. She bawled on the phone, and my plans were ruined. My husband said it was selfish of her to do such a thing when she knew we were on vacation, so she ramped up the drama times ten. She and her friend used to bully me. FML

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bail? - 29/08/2019 23:00 - United States - Omaha

Today, my daughter's idea of a prank was taking all of our money and getting herself arrested. FML

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Delulu

Favorite - 13/11/2023 15:00 - Philippines - Makati City

Today, my mom scolded me for ruining my sister's "vacation" here. She just got deported from abroad, and was only gone for 2 months after falling for a marriage scam. Now she deludes to herself that she was born and raised there, and claims not to understand our mother tongue, calling it third world primate language. FML

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mandybar15 - 14/12/2012 23:52 - United States - Norman

Today, my husband and I sat our 10-year-old daughter down for a chat over her recent cursing. When my husband asked where she'd heard the words, she "innocently" replied, "from mommy's other boyfriend." He took her seriously, accused me of cheating, and hasn't been home since. FML

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Unreasonable

Katsuria - 25/07/2020 14:01

Today, my mother disowned me because I wouldn’t fill out her visa application for France so that she can see her boyfriend. The reason why I refused was because my husband and I are on our honeymoon, and would like to spend some time together. I guess that makes me a “useless” daughter. FML

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This is going to be great!

Anonymous - 29/04/2022 04:00 - United States - Morristown

Today, after we got married five months ago, my wife and I planned a trip to France and Spain as a honeymoon. We’re supposed to be leaving on Saturday. She just told me last night, “I am so not looking forward to the trip.” FML

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C'est la langue de l'amour!

Anonymous - 19/10/2017 05:00

Today, my French teacher set up a role-play scenario to act out in front of the class. During one of my lines, I mispronounced a phrase and called my teacher sexy. FML

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Anonymous - 08/08/2009 09:42 - United Kingdom

Today, I flew my girlfriend to Paris for our one year anniversary. Little did I know that instead of going up the Eiffel Tower and over looking the most romantic city she would rather spend it in bed with a French man. FML

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uncbballwins 0

Saturday 7 May 2011 1:01

Pardon her French!

PrickHead 0

Saturday 7 May 2011 1:02

merde!

Brandnewuser 0

Saturday 7 May 2011 7:50

I created an account just to tell you two to shut up.

Brandnewuser 0

Saturday 7 May 2011 7:52

that was for #40 & #64

nullify1337 0

Saturday 7 May 2011 7:57

touchet...touchet

CrackerJack127 3

Saturday 7 May 2011 8:12

bahahahhahahahahhahaa xD that's awesome;)

khaya 9

Saturday 7 May 2011 9:12

You have an awesome sister, sadly I killed mine for a bar of soap.

Namenlos_fml 20

Saturday 7 May 2011 10:55

Prank wars are "gloves off". 'nuff said

raphanne_fml 33

Saturday 7 May 2011 12:29

Putain de merde is the basics :D (means "******* shit"), and "bitch" is "salope". Any special request? :D

raphanne_fml 33

Saturday 7 May 2011 12:36

I would love to hear English tourists swear in French...

nwatso96 0

Saturday 7 May 2011 14:46

haha I love ur sister for doing that

SunDropGirl 0

Saturday 7 May 2011 15:33

nice... ha pardon her French! what did you do to your sister!?

nwatso96 0

Saturday 7 May 2011 18:01

and 124- are u a ******* ugly dyke or something?

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I sent my girlfriend a text this morning saying I love you. I rarely do this and instead of receiving the same message back, I got a message from my girlfriend accusing me of meaning to send it to someone else and dumped me. FML

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Today, I learned that kicking an armed mugger's ass is something that only happens in movies, and that brass knuckles are really fucking painful. FML

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Today, I got a little too drunk and confessed to my fiancé, the love of my life, that I've been faking my orgasms all along. I hate that I can't lie when I'm drunk. FML

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Today, I was on drive-thru where I work. Our policy is that we can give free treats to dogs that come through. A woman came in and I noticed her dog. Without a thought, I grabbed a treat and asked if her dog wanted one. I looked again. The 'dog' was her daughter. FML

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Today, my dad made me figure out how to disable the adult content filters on our internet. He spent what must have been a full 10 minutes on a distracting, long-winded speech about how he doesn't want to look up porn, but "it's just the principle of the damn thing". Sure, dad. Sure. FML

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Today, I was on the train ride home from a trip to Florida, and I gave my mom a call. While we talked, I made an offhand comment that all my friends back home must miss me. She knowingly asked if I meant my Sims and my cat. FML

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