Poopoo peepee and Animals: Don't call the cops

Don't call the cops

By Elizabeth - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went on a walk. I like to crush acorns as I go. One nut was actually a piece of dog poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 621

You deserved it 27 160

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Same thing different taste

By BaliTheDog - 24/03/2013 23:01 - France

Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 024

You deserved it 97 638

Fresh air

By Ceecee - 22/03/2023 04:00 - United States

Today, I took my dog for a walk in the park. I was enjoying the fresh air until my dog spotted a squirrel and took off running. I ended up getting dragged through the mud and had to walk home covered in dirt and scratches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 605

You deserved it 247

By lbg2msf - 06/11/2013 18:08 - United States - Biloxi

Today, I walked under a tree and heard birds chirping from above. I stopped and looked up, only to catch a face full of bird shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 863

You deserved it 9 504

Handful

By Mary - 19/10/2009 01:11 - France

Today, I was walking my dogs when I noticed one of them had found something, and was eating it. After my command to "drop it" went unheeded, I took it upon myself to scoop it out of her mouth with my finger. After getting it all over my hand, I realized it was a piece of another dog's poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 846

You deserved it 6 937

Pick it up

By Cassie - 02/05/2011 00:21

Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 395

You deserved it 51 025

Surprise!

By AD240Z - 16/12/2016 11:39

Today, while walking my dog in the darkness, I bent down to pick up his poop. I screamed like a little girl as his morning turd leapt up my arm, covering my hand and jacket sleeve in soggy poop. My dog had curled one out onto a dozing frog. I skipped breakfast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 634

You deserved it 654

By mhmohyeah - 10/11/2009 23:05 - United States

Today, I was jumping on every crunchy leaf on the sidewalk. I went especially far out of my way to step on one only to notice it didn't crunch right. I looked closer, it was a dead bird. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 785

You deserved it 18 479

Can't see for shit

By Anonymous - 09/11/2020 14:02

Today, I was out walking my dog. After he took a dump, I went to pick it up but my glasses fell right in his poop. I didn’t have tissue, just the plastic bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 008

You deserved it 241

Squishy or non-squishy?

By Rune - 09/02/2026 09:00

Today, I went to the bathroom. On my way back, I found a small piece of trash in the hallway so I picked it up. It was cat poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39

You deserved it 10

By themanzz - 08/10/2010 12:08 - Canada

Today, I was helping my Dad pick up the pieces of bark that came off the tree that we'd just cut down. I bent over to grab a dark looking piece of bark. Turn out it was my dogs crap. Fresh, warm, moist piece of crap to be exact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 579

You deserved it 8 650

may_cause_fail 0

Monday 27 April 2009 3:29

Well, you were wearing shoes. WEREN'T YOU? I'd hardly call this an FML.

applecake 0

Monday 9 March 2009 9:36

I did the pinecone-crushing thing too; but stepped on a banana slug and slipped.

Comments

NoWayLady 13

Wednesday 31 March 2010 6:15

EPIC FAIL!!!!

Justforlolz 14

Wednesday 14 July 2010 0:26

Lol maybe it was hardened. Sucks.

isaiaha11 2

Thursday 22 July 2010 7:37

its called wipe it off

austin9512 0

Saturday 4 September 2010 10:00

this goes on failblog

zukinihudini 0

Saturday 29 January 2011 0:25

thats what shoes are for

bluegoldfish 7

Sunday 27 March 2011 20:36

that kind of sucks, but at the same time, what kind of a weird habit is acorn crushing?

Angel21102 0

Thursday 31 March 2011 7:46

Big whoop. Everyones gonna step in dog poop once in a while. Deal with it.

Bekavera 4

Saturday 17 September 2011 15:53

And you couldn't tell the difference? Dumbass... lol

dhiran_singh 16

Monday 12 December 2011 12:24

Roasted nuts lol xD

kittytub 12

Sunday 11 November 2012 16:08

those poor squirrels, how will they eat. :(

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Keywords

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The Top

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You deserved it 7 822

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I agree, your life sucks 43 635

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You deserved it 16 325

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I agree, your life sucks 22 125

You deserved it 8 623

Today, I came home to my family remodeling our (extremely) out of date bathroom. I was SUPER excited to help them get it done. I walked down the hallway and opened my bedroom door to find a huge, gaping hole in my wall and my room covered in dust. I had to sweep every surface in my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 380

You deserved it 3 268

Today, I had just sat down and taken a dump in a public restroom when I realized there was no toilet paper. I tried to discreetly call for help, but no one heard me. My only option was to text a friend and have them bring me some. The worst part? My friend ended up texting me, "You called for backup?" as I waited in humiliation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 206

You deserved it 283