Crystal Ball Cat By FML Approved - 31/10/2017 03:00 Now stop trying to touch my belly and just go away! I agree, your life sucks 464 You deserved it 127 Share Tweet Share
Today, it's the third time this year I was recommended to meet someone because we're "so smart, we'll get along." At dinner, this person complimented how I'd do great in their graduate course on data science. I helped develop the degree program. I can't believe I missed pinball for this. FML I agree, your life sucks 447 You deserved it 260
Today, while celebrating at my friend's birthday party, I fell down a flight of stairs, got into a fight with my flatmate, and ruined my friend's outfit after drinking too much. I'm expecting I'll need to find a new place to live tomorrow. FML I agree, your life sucks 6 682 You deserved it 32 191
Today, my dad mentioned how quickly I go through batteries. I've been single and celibate since I moved back home 11 months ago. He doesn't realize this and keeps asking about "missing" batteries. FML I agree, your life sucks 14 483 You deserved it 4 478
Today, I was sick, so I emailed my co-workers with a list of my hours, asking if anyone would be willing to cover them for me. I only got one hour covered, and that was during a day I don't even work. FML I agree, your life sucks 23 828 You deserved it 2 687
Today, I woke up to a strange noise. I looked over to see my drunk husband standing at the dresser. I asked him what he was doing. "Peeing." I asked him, "In the sock drawer?" There was a pause. "Am I peeing in the wrong drawer?" FML I agree, your life sucks 56 349 You deserved it 4 654
Today, I was the only cash register open at the local supermarket. I had to sell condoms and chocolate frosting to my ex. FML I agree, your life sucks 30 280 You deserved it 2 916