LOUNGE_LIZARD

1207

125

Toronto, Canada
27
Monday 07 December 1998

Lounge_lizard

Lounge_lizard -

Lounge_lizard

lovers5201

guthrie123

undere

bandgeek10...

TheTshirt

lishabear

IndicaPain...

Sapphira22...

whensatans...

supermann4...

evalu8tor

Hiimhailey...

bandgeek10...

TheTshirt

Lounge_lizard

Backhanded matchmaker

Highroller_17 - - United States

Today, a customer came in to the Walmart I cashier at, trying to set me up with her daughter. This isn't the first time she's tried. As she so graciously put it, her daughter "has a thing for the wimpy nerdy types". FML

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Lay the blame

jobless - - United States

Today, a guy came into my gas station, showed me the gun on his hip, and asked me to kindly empty the register. My asshole boss claimed afterwards that because we live in an open carry state, and because the guy didn't point the gun at me, that there was no actual robbery and I just gave him free money. FML

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2 889

EverettA - 11/09/2015 13:50 - United States - Lewis Center

Today, my "friends" pulled an elaborate prank on me. First, they changed my ringtone to a recording of someone saying "Allahu Akbar" on repeat. Then, they called me as we had a moment of silence in honor of the 9/11 victims. FML

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3 002

chillnhill - 11/09/2015 02:31 - United States - Shippensburg

Today, my wife is unreasonably mad at me for telling our kids to call toilet paper, "Butt Floss". FML

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chillnhill

chillnhill 24

Saturday 12 September 2015 14:53

OP here, many thanks to those that saw the humor in this! For those that think "YDI", you should know that this happened a VERY long time ago and my kids have all grown up to be successful adults with rich fulfilling lives...

smh - 10/09/2015 06:09 - Canada

Today, after coming home from a long day at work, I found out that in a house full of five adults, some rules still need to be set. The newest addition to the rules? No watching porn and jerking off in the living room. FML

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