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    **** you, Steve

    Not Steve - 08/04/2025 22:00 - United States - Sacramento

    Today, after my company laid off half the contractors I usually deal with and replaced them with AI tools, I spent my day “collaborating” with a chatbot that keeps calling me Steve. My name isn’t Steve. FML
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    It's all too much

    Anonymous - 21/07/2025 05:00 - United States

    Today, my car crapped out in the middle of the road, after over a year of only being able to find short contract jobs, all while juggling the grief of the back to back deaths of my mother and grandfather. FML
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    Guess the country

    All I want for Christmas is loan forgiveness - 25/12/2025 09:00

    Today, I learned that our evil fascist pedophile rapist "President" will start seizing property of people behind on their student loans next month. What property? I have an old crappy car and a dumpy apartment, and I work 2 jobs just to tread water. Take my fucking organs, I guess, they're all I've got. FML
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    Cleanse week

    Anonymous - 26/03/2025 12:00 - United States - Tucson

    Today, I have to pretend to be vegan for a week while visiting my in-laws to avoid eating there. While they are absolutely wonderful, kind, loving people, their kitchen is absolutely disgusting, and their food handling habits are atrocious. I’m so hungry. FML
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    Be the change you want to see in the world

    Anonymous - 31/08/2025 20:00 - United States

    Today, unfortunately, my friend is a victim of domestic violence and I want to be there for her. The dilemma is that I was abused for 7 months by one of her buddies and she's basically making it out as if it didn't happen. Basically downplaying my trauma all because it's her "homie." Double standards or what? FML
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    So sexy

    Anonymous - 27/09/2025 20:00

    Today, I was relaxing in the bath with oils and candles and a new book when my husband burst in with diarrhoea, filled the toilet, polluted the air, and knocked my new book into the bathwater. Then, while washing his hands, he asked if I wanted an oil covered shag. Romantic, right? FML
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    I've got a lot going on, OK?

    Anonymous - 20/07/2025 15:00 - South Africa

    Today, I'm going to visit my mother in hospital. She broke her hip and my father refused to take her to hospital for 6 days, insisting she would get better. My dog had cancer surgery, which will cost me a whole month's salary. I’m still recovering from 2 major surgeries myself, and my kids are being total dorks. FML
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    Someone check in on this guy

    Klinger - 08/05/2025 20:00 - United States

    Today, I was in a public restroom and slipped on some soap on the floor while I was washing my hands. As I fell, I grabbed the nearest thing to break my fall, which happened to be the hand dryer. It fell off the wall and hit me in the face. FML
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    Get this shit away from me

    Tipped off - 18/06/2025 22:00 - United States - Boston

    Today, I ordered sushi for dinner. When it arrived, I realized the delivery driver had given me the wrong order, a family-sized vegan lasagna. I don’t even like regular lasagna, let alone vegan lasagna. FML
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    Respect the hustle

    Anonymous - 05/09/2025 12:00 - South Africa - Nelspruit

    Today, I found out, after months of being made to think I'm crazy, that my girlfriend has a complete online presence across 10+ cam/OnyFans/websites/Telegram, etc. It's my biggest trigger, my previous partner did the same on a much bigger scale. She denied it to the point of me moving out. FML
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    Dude, where's my car?

    Hannah - 19/03/2025 06:00 - United States

    Today, I heard that my ex wrecked my car. He'd "borrowed it" and has had it for 2 months. He refused to return it. I went to the police and they went behind my back and "attempted" to retrieve it yesterday, without me. This just caused him to run away. FML
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    Hush!

    Anonymous - 03/03/2025 23:00 - United Kingdom

    Today, I received a letter signed “anonymously” by at least 6 of my neighbours that unless I do something about my loud nightmares they’re going to start calling the police every time it happens. FML
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    Loyalty

    Anonymous - 04/04/2025 17:00 - United States - Kenner

    Today, after I finally got up the courage to talk to the girl I'd been crushing on for years, we've got super close over a few weeks. Her best friend, who I'm kinda friends with, texted me, confessing that she likes me. Now the first girl won't talk to me for the sake of her best friend, who I'm not interested in. FML
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    One thing after the other

    Anonymous - 16/09/2025 00:00

    Today, someone did a hit and run on my car hard enough to knock it onto the curb from its parking spot, destroying the bumper. They didn't leave any info behind. After taking care of police reports and such, I got home and took off my shoes just to step in a puddle of my roommate's horrible cat's diarrhea. FML
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    Sharing my journey

    Anonymous - 05/07/2025 00:00 - United States - Healdsburg

    Today, my partner has been losing weight to get slimmer and took a picture of the scale. He posted it onto his Facebook and tagged me in it. After two hours we got messages from his family to look in the reflection of the glass on the scale and I was nude in the background. Thanks, Hun! FML
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    Too close to him

    Jack - 18/04/2025 12:00 - United States

    Today, I was walking my dog in my suburban neighborhood when all of a sudden we practically jumped out of our skin (and fur) when we heard what I assumed were fireworks. Nope, someone down the street was testing their new AR-15 in their backyard. All perfectly legal. FML
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    Which way now?

    Nadia - 03/03/2025 08:00 - United States

    Today, it's been two years since my fiancé proposed, drunk, and with no ring. Recently, I overheard him on a Zoom call with a work colleague who'd not talked to him since he was with his last girlfriend, who was much more attractive than I am. The colleague asked if they were still together and he lied and said yes. FML
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    Ticking time bomb

    Rosa - 27/09/2025 12:00

    Today, my ex-boyfriend went "social media official" with another girl. He dumped me less than 24 hours ago for forgetting to get utensils for our takeout. Now I know why he’s been systematically picking fights and getting irrationally angry over minuscule things for the past three months. FML
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    Hobbit feet

    Anonymous - 11/05/2025 23:00 - United Kingdom

    Today, my dad has such thick, horn like toenails that when I stepped on one of the cuttings, it actually stabbed into the thinner skin on the underside of my toe and bled like crazy. FML
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    The spark is gone

    Anonymous - 10/02/2025 14:00 - United States - Orange Park

    Today, my husband of 16 years had to force himself to be intimate with me. In his words, not because he’s not attracted to me but because he no longer has emotions or feelings towards me. I’m still deeply in love and had to force intimacy because now I feel like I’m just a means to an end. FML
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    Kicked off

    - 03/11/2025 03:00

    Today, I got discharged from the hospital after a six day stay, minus half my kicking foot. Not a diabetic, no trauma, just got some chills and was found to have extensive bone infection. FML
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    He's winding you up

    Where did I fail? - 23/12/2025 00:00

    Today, when I was 14, all I could think about was girls. My son, however, would rather be a "furry", meaning he wears cat ears everywhere, meows and hisses in conversation, and keeps licking his hands and wiping them on his face. FML
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    Thanks, bro

    Anonymous - 20/10/2025 09:00

    Today, at my wedding, my golden child brother gave a speech that was a load of lying shite. He was telling tales of arrests, drug use, sexual antics, the lot. My wife knows it’s not true but her family think I’m scum, and my mother just told me she’s “not angry, just disappointed in me.” FML
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    Priorities

    Anonymous - 15/06/2025 22:00 - Poland - Warsaw

    Today, I wanted to spend some time with my girl, but she was more interested in her phone and 90 Day Fiancé. Bored, I went to play video games. Ten minutes later, she came looking for me and yelled that I clearly prefer video games to her. FML
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    We can be friends

    Anonymous - 09/09/2025 00:00

    Today, I was told that it's "weird" for a single guy to go to events by himself and that I should go places with my friends if I "didn't want to look creepy." It was a speed-friending event. I don't have any friends. FML
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    The body keeps the score

    Shitty situation hur hur - 23/07/2025 06:00 - United States

    Today, my wife called me at work, crying, because she shat her pants. I'd feel more sympathy if she ever ate fruit, or vegetables, or anything other than sugar and carbs, or took the prescription fiber supplements her doctor prescribed. FML
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    Don't give up

    Frustrated - 24/08/2025 13:00 - United States

    Today, my wife complained that our sex life is too boring and vanilla. I have spent the last two years suggesting ideas to keep it interesting: S&M, swinging, roleplay, cosplay, public play, new toys, you name it. All I ever hear is, "Eww you pervert, that is disgusting and sick, how dare you even mention that." FML
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    Soap opera

    Anonymous - 26/08/2025 23:00 - Australia

    Today, the water cut out while I was showering, covered in soap and shampoo. I had to rinse with freezing cold drinking water from the fridge. As soon as I'd dried off, the water supply got restored. FML
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    Infectious

    Looupyloou - 07/01/2026 12:00

    Today, it's day four of liquid ass and violent hurling after I hosted a birthday party for my daughter, and one of the kids brought a stomach virus rather than a present. Yesterday my daughter started with the violent vomiting too. Everything smells like vomit in my home. Yay me! FML
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    Waste of time

    Anonymous - 23/03/2025 06:00 - United States - Belton

    Today, the lab wouldn't let me do my pre-employment drug test because they had no time when I had to pee really bad. They signed me in to do other blood work I needed, but when I asked to use the bathroom, they said it was for drug testing only. I peed myself in the lobby and couldn't do the blood test either. FML
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    FMyLife FMyLife
    FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, and for the 4 months preceding it, my neighbors had been remodeling their house, which meant jackhammer noises every morning. The one day they take a break, my other neighbor decides to start a remodeling project. It'll only be two more months of this. FML
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    Today, I was emailing my professor about what chapters our test is on this afternoon. She accidentally emailed me informing me about the date she went on last night, including that she "got laid... yay!!" and a picture. I still don't know what chapters I'm being tested on. FML
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    Today, I recently got into a relationship with a 15 year-old. I’m 17. All my friends are calling me a pedo. Am I the only one that doesn’t think the age gap is weird? FML
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    Today, I spent a good few minutes watching my wife thrash our son with a pillow because despite all our warnings to him about safe sex, he and his girlfriend are going to be parents in about 6 months, and they’re both 16. FML
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    Today, I got into a debate with my boyfriend over whether or not oral sex was considered sex. I stood firm that it was not. Apparently, he took this as permission, as later that night I walked in on him not having sex with my sister. FML
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    Today, I took a trip to the library's public computer section to get some important work done. After a bit of work, I went to stretch only to see that the man next to me was watching some adult films on his computer and discreetly touching himself. I still had 58 minutes of computer time. FML
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