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Rehab blues

By Anonymous - 30/11/2025 15:00

Today, a week after my girlfriend of 6 years checked herself into a rehab program 5 hours away, she called me and said I was too much of a toxic enabler and not good for her mental health, so she ended it and I have to move out before she gets home. I was going to propose when she came home. I’m completely broken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 419

You deserved it 134

Office supplies

By Nervous - 04/12/2025 03:00

Today, during a Zoom meeting, I tried to discreetly mute myself before yelling at my printer for jamming again. I wasn’t muted. My whole team listened as I threatened a piece of office equipment with violence. My boss suggested therapy for “Printer anger.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 160

You deserved it 396

Jealousy

By Thought you would be happy for me, "bestie" - 13/12/2025 00:00

Today, I proudly showed off my new body, after losing 80 pounds. My life-long best friend immediately uninvited me to her upcoming wedding, and won't explain why. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 65

Where are they going??

By Anonymous - 23/12/2025 15:00

Today, I ordered a food delivery and tracked it obsessively because I was starving. When it 'arrived', I realized I’d sent it to my old address from two years ago. Support said it was “successfully delivered.” Somewhere, a stranger is enjoying my dinner while I eat crackers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 121

You deserved it 499

Winner winner, chicken dinner

By Anonymous - 10/01/2026 09:00

Today, I wrecked my car on the way to work, all because I could get free food from a restaurant for my team winning a game. My husband suggested it. Now I’m without a car, with massive hospital bills, all for the most expensive fast food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98

You deserved it 470

Bad call

By Nathalie - 17/01/2026 12:00

Today, I tried to carry all my grocery bags in one trip. I was doing great until the plastic handles stretched and snapped in the parking lot. A carton of eggs exploded, an avocado rolled under a car, and a bottle of wine shattered. Someone asked if I needed help. I said no because I was too embarrassed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 151

You deserved it 361

Oh, hai Mark!

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, I met my new psychologist for the first time. Expecting it to be someone I wouldn’t know, the door opens and out walks a man I hooked up with once. What makes it worse was he pissed my bed that night. I never called him back or spoke to him again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 809

You deserved it 336

Thanks Alex

By Anonymous - 05/02/2026 22:00

Today, I transferred rent to my landlord and realized I’d sent it to the wrong “Alex” in my contacts. My bank said the payment was already completed and they couldn’t reverse it without the other person’s permission. I had to message a guy I went on one awkward date with two years ago asking him to please send my rent money back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 186

You deserved it 377

Lost in translation

By Anonymous - 16/02/2026 15:00

Today, someone said not to speak to them like I'm "better than them." I asked how they would like me to speak; I couldn't figure out the problem. The response I got was, "Speak to me like you speak to your lord." Am I the idiot? I wasn't even the one who initiated the conversation to begin with, nor did I intend for beef. FML

I agree, your life sucks 358

You deserved it 69

Hate the game, not the player

By Anonymous - 02/03/2026 22:00

Today, I went on a date with a guy and it went great. I later found out that he came inside another girl, stole her sweatshirt, then left. After that, he proceeded to bang another girl. Both of these girls are in my friend group, and I still went on a date with him after. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83

You deserved it 330

Leave us alone

By Anonymous - 10/03/2026 00:00

Today, my adoptive parents were harassed yet again simply because they're black and I'm white. FML

I agree, your life sucks 497

You deserved it 72

Shiny happy people

By Anonymous - 15/03/2026 09:00

Today, it was picture day and I had gotten my hair really nice and my outfit was perfect. Then, disaster: I was fidgeting with those squishy things filled with water and glitter, and it suddenly exploded. One second I'm playing with it, the next it's exploded all over my face. It's safe to say I truly shined in that picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 177

You deserved it 297

Anything for a quiet life

By Anonymous - 18/03/2026 22:00

Today, I got mad at my husband for slacking off on chores. I wanted help so we could both spend time with our daughters who were visiting. He was having a heart attack and didn't want to spoil the visit, so he kept quiet. I just got mad instead of noticing he was in pain. I'm a jerk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 182

You deserved it 563

Holidays in the sun

By ToxicFamily - 05/04/2025 22:00 - Germany

Today, all I wanted was to go on a vacation in April. I've been asking my husband since last April and he begrudgingly booked everything last minute a month before. Now he's cancelled everything he booked due to his dad being sick. I was OK with it, but now I've got no vacations for this year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 202

You deserved it 369

Well played, Deborah

By Anonymous - 11/04/2025 02:00

Today, my bitch ex has successfully trained our daughter to refer to her second husband as “Dad” and me as Mister, or Sir, or even by my first name a few times. This has to be abuse of some kind, mental anguish, cruel and unusual bullshit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 364

You deserved it 91

Gentrification

By Broke boy - 16/04/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, after I got a second job to help cover rent, my landlord just raised it anyway “because the neighborhood is up-and-coming.” There’s still a pothole the size of a kiddie pool in front of my building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 436

You deserved it 76

The body keeps the score

By Anonymous - 19/04/2025 18:00 - United States - Fredericksburg

Today, the girl I used to be in love with texted me again after 5 months. She wanted to say that she remembers my birthday, which is next month. I hate that my heart still speeds up at the mention of her name, and I know it won't ever stop. She was my first crush since I came out, and my first heartbreak. I hate it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 385

You deserved it 142

Cycles of life

By Anonymous - 23/04/2025 15:00 - Bosnia and Herzegovina - Cazin

Today, my daughter got her first period. I'm the one shaking and hyperventilating. I'm more nervous for her than I was for myself back when I got my first period. I just now understand my mom while she was pacing through house back and forward when I got my first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 388

I hate this

By Danny - 25/04/2025 02:00 - United States

Today, my dad is fighting for his life after a pancreatic cancer diagnosis and a life threatening surgery. I work full time and I visit him when I can, knowing we’re on borrowed time. I come home emotional exhausted and drained, only to be met with a nagging wife that says I’m not prioritizing her or the kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 608

You deserved it 86

Felt cute, might delete later

By Anonymous - 09/05/2025 15:00 - United States - Burlington

Today, I put on a new outfit, took a bunch of selfies, and posted the best one to Instagram. Ten minutes later, my grandma commented, “You look tired. Are you eating enough?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 317

You deserved it 199

#GirlBoss

By What the fuck - 06/06/2025 18:00 - United States - New York

Today, I caught my underage daughter selling naked pictures to internet sickos. Trying to stay calm, I asked her why. She said, "Should I go work at McDonald's for pennies? I've made over twelve grand in three months selling pictures of my tits." FML

I agree, your life sucks 514

You deserved it 141

Get on with it

By Not PMS, she's just a mega bitch - 08/06/2025 13:00 - United States

Today, at my son's soccer game, I tried to give him a bottle of Gatorade, but the top was damp with condensation and I couldn't get a grip. I wiped it dry and tried again, successfully this time. No big deal, except my wife was watching and screamed, "IT SHOULDN'T TAKE THAT LONG!" Everyone stopped and stared. FML

I agree, your life sucks 463

You deserved it 80

Clapback

By Anonymous - 14/06/2025 11:00 - Australia

Today, the cafe lady misnamed me Michael. I corrected her and jokingly exclaimed that Michael must be really handsome if she mistook me for him. She simply responded, “No, not really.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 140

You deserved it 403

Thank you for your service

By Too Fat4 U - 01/07/2025 18:00 - United States

Today, I heard the guy I love talk to a friend of his. He was telling his friend how he appreciates all my attention, affection, and random gestures such as buying him lunch sometimes, but he’ll never see me in a romantic way because I’m “too fat for his taste.” I was basically used the entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 498

You deserved it 260

Just put it on, dude

By BING BING BING - 07/07/2025 16:00 - Japan - Tokyo

Today, I started a road trip with friends. The friend who is driving doesn't wear seat belts. BING BING BING. 400 miles to go. BING BING BING. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 110

Shy guy

By Jen - 09/07/2025 04:00 - Romania

Today, I took my son to a birthday party. He spent the entire time clinging to my hand and refused to play with his friends, eat, or participate in activities. His friend tried to pull him away from me, but he refused to go. When we left, he started crying because he felt left out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 143

Betrayed

By Anonymous - 10/07/2025 21:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that my husband never actually took our new healthy lifestyle seriously when his coworker told me that now, instead of at the house, he keeps beer and cigars at his brother's house, and visits the Burger King drive through every day for lunch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 226

Magic morning treat fairy

By PuppiesKisses - 14/07/2025 05:00 - United States

Today, my corgi brought her new favorite treat into my bed: a rotting deer hoof with six inches of leg. She left it on my pillow, and the smell woke me up. She wasn't even on the bed when I woke up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 440

You deserved it 112

Freak out

By Brave - 06/08/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I tried to surprise my girlfriend by showing up at her apartment early. I climbed through her bedroom window, holding flowers. I got the wrong window. Some old man screamed, hit me with a broom, and called the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 106

You deserved it 851

Knock yourself out

By Anonymous - 09/08/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, my package with two brand new toys got delivered to the wrong apartment. Somewhere in this apartment complex, a stranger is either judging me or having the best day of their life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 404

You deserved it 102

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I stopped taking prescription narcotics for pain, which make you constipated. I also enjoyed a few beers. Because of this collaboration, I had a very painful first turd followed by a flow of burning liquid. I cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 865

You deserved it 342

Today, I found out that my 4-year-old son is truly convinced that I am a ghost. He also thinks that I died from burning, "because of your face". FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 001

You deserved it 2 396

Today, I lost my virginity. It took all of 30 seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 489

You deserved it 5 368

Today, I'm really puzzled about explaining what he saw to our 6-year old. So, he walked in on us mid-sex, which itself would be barely acceptable if there were only the two of us, his married parents, but actually a dead drunk threesome between my husband, his best male friend, and me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 95

You deserved it 601

Today, It's been two years since I graduated from high school. The people in my grade excluded me from social activities and wouldn't talk to me. I dropped out of college when the same trends ensued and people treated me the same. For now, at 20, I serve drive-thru to people who bullied me, on their way to party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 492

You deserved it 318

Today, I caught my 14-year-old daughter stealing alcohol from me. After berating her for half-an-hour I finally said, "At least you're not doing drugs." She gave me a guilty smile and sheepishly said, "At least I'm not a prostitute?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 546

You deserved it 15 401