Health: Today, while wiping my ass, the broken finger that has been set...

By broken finger - 18/07/2013 20:53 - United States

Today, while wiping my ass, the broken finger that has been set straight dipped into the toilet and touched a turd. This keeps happening since I broke it, and I'm sure it will again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 403

You deserved it 12 035

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 20/06/2015 01:22 - United States

Today, I was using the toilet. I was still insanely pissed off over an argument with my girlfriend, which kind of explains why I was wiping my ass so furiously that my fingers broke through the tissue and ended up in my ass, causing me to shriek like a little girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 902

You deserved it 14 232

By clitorasaurus - 21/08/2010 06:09 - Canada

Today, I pulled a muscle in my arm while wiping my butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 628

You deserved it 33 012

HELP!

By SeatofIgnorance - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, during an emergency bathroom visit, I finally broke the toilet seat my fiance had nagged me for months to replace. The broken seat sent me sprawling to the floor. I was still shitting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 763

You deserved it 5 464

Ouch

By sadface - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Australia

Today, I pulled a hamstring by taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 798

You deserved it 7 510

By Anonymous - 17/03/2011 18:57 - United States

Today, after speeding home due to an overflowing bladder, I ran to the bathroom, forgetting that the toilet seat was broken. While doing my business, the toilet seat and I both slid off the bowl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 032

You deserved it 7 043

Heavy load

By Fattypatty - 09/07/2009 06:21 - United States

Today, I realized how fat I really am. While going to the bathroom I leaned to the side to wipe my butt and heard a crack. Not knowing what it was, I continued to wipe. After I finished, I got up to see that I'd cracked the toilet seat in half. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 332

You deserved it 58 307

By Anonymous - 29/03/2018 19:30 - United States - Stamford

Today, I was checking my phone while using the toilet. In a distressing moment of my brain mixing up the signals to my hands, I dropped my phone into the bowl and pressed my thumb into the shitty paper to turn it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 633

You deserved it 3 736

By Sica - 15/03/2012 19:28 - France

Today, I broke my little toe. It got stuck in my panties as I struggled to get a leg through. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 750

You deserved it 6 414

By Anonymous - 24/10/2009 02:25 - United States

Today, I was changing my shirt in the bathroom when I dropped it. It fell on my foot, so I decided to flip it up with my foot instead of bending down to get it. I flipped it, and it landed in the toilet. Which somebody had not flushed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 350

You deserved it 35 665

By neednewshoes - 07/12/2017 01:30

Today, like every day, I flushed a public toilet with my foot. Today, unlike every day, my foot missed the handle and landed in the unflushed water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 442

You deserved it 5 021

profoundkisses 18

Friday 19 July 2013 7:26

Use your other hand!

revan546 24

Friday 19 July 2013 7:26

Sounds like a shitty situa- no... No.. Im better than this...

Comments

Nederlander95 14

Sunday 27 April 2014 21:01

Stand up to wipe then

trey600rr 22

Tuesday 23 December 2014 1:51

your sick stand up to wipe!

Sneado 20

Wednesday 18 March 2015 6:55

For the love of God, stand up!

Lucifer_Solus 9

Wednesday 29 April 2015 23:35

Then stand and wipe like a normal person. Who the **** wipes while still sitting?! Weirdo

Kara_araK 24

Saturday 23 May 2015 22:04

Why don't you use your other hand? That's really gross ....

fabulousfiasco 12

Monday 8 June 2015 21:37

This could have easily been avoided. Stand up! If your finger is extended, adjust your habits.

AceOfSpades11 10

Thursday 7 January 2016 18:27

Stand up and wipe

trumpy 9

Saturday 16 January 2016 15:38

did you break your brain too? you have two hands

roxannam 14

Saturday 16 January 2016 22:14

use your other hand if you have 2!

thatsthewayitis2 6

Saturday 20 August 2016 23:56

Other hand dumbass

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You deserved it 471

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I agree, your life sucks 47 623

You deserved it 3 406

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I agree, your life sucks 99

You deserved it 523

Today, I was working on a project in my school's library when a group of teenagers came in and began talking and laughing and being loud. When I asked them to please quiet down, the librarian asked me to leave for being too loud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 911

You deserved it 2 460

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I agree, your life sucks 32 743

You deserved it 4 682

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I agree, your life sucks 37 494

You deserved it 77 025

Same thing different taste

HELP!

Ouch

Heavy load

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