Miscellaneous Today, the guy I buy weed from invited me to have Easter dinner... - FML

mel - 25/03/2016 13:20 - United States - Smithville

Today, the guy I buy weed from invited me to have Easter dinner with his family, since I've nowhere else to go. FML

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Women's Day: Equality and Laughter
Stories that celebrate women in a light-hearted and humorous way, because equality can also be a source of joy! …

Stellar parenting

joi9496 -

Today, at age 23, I met my absentee father. He went on about how much he missed me and wanted to know more about me. He then asked if I knew where he could get some good weed, and said he'd share it to make up for all the missed birthdays and Christmases. FML

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CaptainByron - 28/04/2017 00:00

Today, my father contacted me for the first time in close to 2 months. The first thing he did was ask if I wanted to buy some weed. FML

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Merry Xmas

Anonymous - - United States - Jeromesville

Today, a friend had invited me to Christmas dinner since I have no family close by. When I got there, she told me that her and her husband had forgotten they had another dinner to go to, and asked if I would watch their kids for them. They each grabbed a handful of cookies I had baked and rushed out the door. FML

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Anonymous - 24/04/2011 20:55 - United States

Today, it is both my birthday and Easter. My whole family came into town and my mom made a big dinner with all of my favorite foods. After church, I took a nap. When I woke up, all the food, including my cake, was gone. No one thought to wake me up. FML

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Miscommunication

Anonymous - 04/10/2020 04:02 - United States - Holmdel

Today, I went to a going away party for a coworker. I had brought weed for the party and at one point a guy asked me if I have a Grindr. I replied, "No, I don't use those dating apps. I do have a Fetlife but that's it, if you want it." He apparently meant a weed grinder. Most awkward 3 hours ever. FML

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lonesome - 28/04/2013 05:23 - Canada

Today, my whole family made an hour-long drive to a restaurant that's just a few minutes away from my place. I wasn't invited. FML

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Harry Pothead

Anonymous - 21/10/2021 17:02 - Canada - North York

Today, my husband said he wouldn't be talking to me for weeks, because I didn't buy him weed. Yeah, I paid all the bills and the rent this month. FML

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Potted - 16/11/2015 02:34 - United States - Denton

Today, after my close friend had his baby, he told me that he was no longer going to be selling weed at his house. I was happy for him, because it's unsafe. Until I found out he was still selling at my house with the help of my roommates, without telling me. FML

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UnknownOperation - 04/09/2012 13:51 - United States - Washington

Today, I finally decided to introduce my boyfriend to my parents. Surprisingly, he and my father already knew each other, so I asked him how they met. Now I know where my boyfriend gets all his weed. FML

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Angel - 13/01/2016 13:56 - United States - Charlotte

Today, the guy I'm dating took me to a dinner party at a couple's house. Halfway through dinner, I realized they were having the dinner party for the sole purpose of introducing him to their recently single daughter. FML

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loueasy 23

Friday 25 March 2016 16:06

The ham won't be the only thing that's smoked

gobroski 11

Friday 25 March 2016 16:06

That's nice....

gobroski 11

Friday 25 March 2016 16:06

That's nice....

haileyrows 26

Friday 25 March 2016 16:06

At least you now have somewhere to go- it'd be more of an FML if no one would have you over.

Danne696 14

Sunday 27 March 2016 10:45

I completely agree. It's not like him being a pot-dealer makes him any less of a person, he knew OP didn't have anywhere to go so he opened up his home to give him a place to celebrate.

loueasy 23

Friday 25 March 2016 16:06

The ham won't be the only thing that's smoked

teentee401 36

Saturday 26 March 2016 19:23

I would've said baked.

Jstick 10

Friday 25 March 2016 16:06

Maybe you can get some more weed

rosha267 21

Friday 25 March 2016 16:07

That's so sweet!

CoupeDeAce 6

Friday 25 March 2016 16:07

You know you're a pothead when your dealer is your best friend.

A1NoSauce 17

Saturday 26 March 2016 5:35

Does it count if your best friend happened to become a dealer?

UserError94 18

Friday 25 March 2016 16:14

420 braze it anyone?

pedinhuh 23

Friday 25 March 2016 16:17

Try to get some of that weed for free!

more4me 27

Saturday 26 March 2016 0:36

I don't agree. The guy is being nice to you by opening his home. Just be nice in return and don't take advantage of him . Of course, if he offers, then it would be rude to refuse, right ?

squigglez11 10

Friday 25 March 2016 16:18

Bring some weed

vikky538 28

Friday 25 March 2016 16:19

That's ! I donno what to say

Arkham_Callabero 15

Friday 25 March 2016 19:46

So instead of not commenting anything at all you decided it's best for us to know that you have nothing to say?

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my cat got mad at me because I wouldn't let him sit on my Xbox. Jeez, sorry that I care about your safety, and I don't want my Xbox to overheat. FML

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Today, in my early morning haze, I tried to find the setting on my phone that would stop my cat meowing for his breakfast. FML

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Today, my girlfriend and I were trying something new. I ended up with a shard of glass in my back and a concussion. Don't have sex on a glass table. FML

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Today, I told my husband that as I wasn't hungry, he had to cook for himself. He rang my Spanish stepmother as a joke to complain that I’m not wifey material. She showed up, whacked me with her Chancla, and browbeat me into cooking. He feels hella guilty, but he’s still a dead man once she leaves. FML

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Today, my neighbor got a ridiculous surround sound system that sounds like Jurassic fucking Park come to life. My walls are literally shaking. I tried asking nicely for them to turn it down. They told me to fuck off, and that if I call the cops with a noise complaint, well… they know where I live. FML

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Today, I left my empty shower running so I could pretend I didn't still live alone. FML

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