Kids: Today, my son visited for the first time in three years, asking...

By I fathered a pussy. - 14/06/2013 22:12 - United States - Lakeland

Today, my son visited for the first time in three years, asking to stay a while. It turns out he insulted someone online and gave his address in case they wanted to fight him. They accepted the offer, and so my son's imaginary Muay Thai skills went AWOL, along with his testicles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 022

You deserved it 4 950

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Same thing different taste

Fight! Fight! Fight!

By Anonymous - 02/03/2016 17:54 - United States - Cedar Rapids

Today, some muscle-head showed up at my house and started beating on me. Turned out my son had been posing online as a Navy SEAL, using a picture of me, and had dared this guy to come over and fight him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 697

You deserved it 2 037

By Jim - 19/04/2016 17:25 - United States

Today, my son is having housing issues, so I let him stay at my place for a while. Today, he found out that the quiet, dorky-looking professor who lives next door is an MMA fighter. He tried to break into the guy's house in the middle of the night and is now in the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 408

You deserved it 4 206

Idiot

By I hate teenagers! - 21/02/2025 18:00 - United States - Anaheim

Today, my idiot son has been getting his ass kicked nearly every day since he spread a rumor that he’d been sleeping with the most popular girl in school. Not only is she the wrestling coach’s daughter, her brothers are all massive jocks. Even though he apologized the beatings keep coming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 550

By anna - 31/10/2013 18:27 - United States - Hattiesburg

Today, I had to take my 15-year-old son to the hospital. He'd gone out dressed as some My Little Pony character and encountered someone who'd had the same idea. They then got into a fistfight, and my son got the shit beaten out of him. I wish I'd never bred. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 392

You deserved it 9 786

He had it coming

By Anonymous - 19/09/2023 22:00

Today, I found out why my son has been working out and taking martial arts classes. It was so he could beat his stepbrother up and put him in the hospital, as revenge for stealing his secret cash supply, over £4000. I'm too old and too tired for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 477

By I Have Failed - 02/04/2014 20:10 - Spain - Madrid

Today, my 14-year-old son's pathetic rebellion came to a head. He ran away from home, leaving a note saying he hates me and was leaving forever to be part of a gang his friends had formed. He came back an hour later crying. His whole gang had gotten mugged, which he somehow blamed me for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 199

You deserved it 6 611

Teenagers…

By why the fuck would you do that - 25/02/2013 02:57 - United States - Phoenix

Today, my son broke his hand when he and his best friend had the genius idea of punching each other in the fists as hard as they could. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 621

You deserved it 3 796

Pure evil

By Anonymous - 28/11/2023 00:00

Today, my son got in an argument with my boyfriend, packed up his stuff, and moved in with his dad. Not five minutes later I saw my boyfriend doing his stupid happy dance. When angrily confronted, he admitted he orchestrated every argument for months until he got the result he wanted, my son gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 378

You deserved it 1 095

Gun culture is fascinating

By Gun safety - 21/12/2024 18:00 - United States - New York

Today, my 14 year-old son asked to join my buddies and me at the gun range. The second I finished the safety lecture and handed him a pistol, he started twirling it on his finger (thankfully, it was unloaded). I smacked him in the head and took him home. Now he's moping and sulking like a bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 706

You deserved it 253

Kinda deserved it

By Anonymous - 10/12/2021 14:02

Today, my son, who to my great shame is a typical bully, was suspended for bullying a disabled girl. Her father must have been the biggest, meanest, most tattooed ex-marine I've ever seen. He blamed me for bad parenting, and I actually peed myself a little in fear, which he saw too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 405

You deserved it 1 661

arre2006 19

Saturday 15 June 2013 5:26

E-thugging backfired bigtime

chanellgymnast 17

Saturday 15 June 2013 5:30

Your username gives this FML justice.

Comments

alxpilk 8

Saturday 15 June 2013 20:21

Most people challenging someone to a fight online are *******.

LeeCards 8

Saturday 15 June 2013 20:23

He's been getting too in touch with his inner champion. Probably for the better he drops League of Legends for a while.

Aero220 16

Sunday 16 June 2013 1:01

"You wanna go? Here's my address, I'll be the one hiding behind his mommy!"

pattayarick 8

Sunday 16 June 2013 1:14

Find that online person and let him know where your pussy, I men son, is. Adopt him after he kicks your son's ass

Axel5238 29

Sunday 16 June 2013 3:21

Wow I still find it hard to believe someone in this day and age is dumb enough to post their address online. Hopefully, this teaches him a lesson.

greggly123 6

Sunday 16 June 2013 3:32

That's what he gets for being a telephone tough guy. Next time it'll be someone in person and they'll break his jaw

amifaiyaz 12

Sunday 16 June 2013 5:32

you didn't father a pussy, you fathered a moron.

prince503 3

Sunday 16 June 2013 6:00

I would contact the guy online and tell him where to figure and my son. and then open up a bottle of jack and watch :)

Frenchtony 17

Monday 17 June 2013 0:38

Just saying but I'm 6'3 and 220lbs Israeli champion of krav'maga, if any of you ******* is feeling lucky come to my address ! 112 fake-lier st. New York, California Australia.

ChuckNorris2 4

Monday 17 June 2013 9:36

I would suggest kicking the kid out and making sure he fights and gets his ass kicked, so he won't pull that again. Seriously, internet tough guying it up is not cool.