Miscellaneous: Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping,...

By Anonymous - 09/09/2010 14:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping, she said loudly that she was having trouble finding clothes to fit around her huge fanny, causing a lot of people to stare in our direction. I had to explain to her that "fanny" in the UK means "vagina." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 581

You deserved it 4 484

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Same thing different taste

By Chubs - 29/03/2009 12:32 - Norway

Today, I was playing with my kid cousin outside. It was warm, so I was wearing my new bikini, and felt pretty good about myself. She suddenly turns to me and asks, "How come your tits are so small when you have such a big belly?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 357

You deserved it 11 656

Silver linings

By Anonymous - 07/10/2009 01:11 - Canada

Today, I went shopping for a new pair of jeans. I was feeling good about the fact that I was going down a waist size until the cashier decided to discuss with me, three co-workers, and the ten other people in line how she didn't even know jeans came in sizes that big. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 476

You deserved it 6 836

Nice boxers

By Harmonia - 26/01/2009 10:09 - France

Today, I went shopping with my boyfriend. He tried on a pair of trousers which didn't fit, so he asked me to change them, so off I went. I returned with another pair for him to try on, found him bent over and blurted out, "What's with the terrible underwear?" I'd entered the wrong changing room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 895

You deserved it 9 559

You little knob

By keelah - 27/06/2014 21:57 - United States - Montgomery

Today, my cousin asked me what it's like to be so fat. I chastised him and said that was a rude thing to ask. He apologized, then asked me what it's like to be such a pussy. He didn't stop until he, a 10 year-old kid, had reduced me, a 26 year-old woman, to tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 713

You deserved it 8 604

Flattered

By Creeped out - 28/01/2013 08:14 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I was trying on some shoes. As I was bending down, an old lady with a walking frame slowly approached. As she got close she whispered to me, "Mmm, you've got a nice tushie." My girlfriend will not let me hear the end of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 218

You deserved it 3 714

Holy eyesight, Batman!

By Anonymous - 05/08/2023 22:00

Today, I thought a cute guy was checking out my ass, so I cheekily bent over a little to give him an eyeful. He walked over to a shop assistant, pointed at me and left. The assistant then informed me, “Miss, you’ve torn your trousers, your knickers are visible, and, um, apparently you have a skid mark.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 266

You deserved it 1 248

By no boobies - 29/05/2013 16:39 - United States

Today, while shopping for dresses, I found a really cute one that fit me really well, but not at all in the breast area. My grandma screamed "buy her some titties!" Everyone in the store looked at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 763

You deserved it 4 377

By Anonymous - 31/10/2014 10:55 - United Kingdom - Pontypridd

Today, my boyfriend told my four-year-old sister that "fatass" means "beautiful lady." I didn't know about this until I took my sister shopping with me. The woman at the till said she was adorable; my sister replied, "Thanks, fatass." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 629

You deserved it 3 320

By xkellybabyyx - 25/11/2009 01:05 - United States

Today, I was walking through the streets with my best friend, feeling confident in my new skinny jeans. My friend said, "you really should be wearing a thong with those pants, your underwear line is showing". I was wearing a thong, those lines were just my fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 912

You deserved it 40 677

By Sammylad - 07/09/2011 22:14 - United Kingdom

Today, I was giving a talk in class, when halfway through someone pointed out that my pubes were sticking out my trousers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 928

You deserved it 15 377

WiseGuy79 14

Thursday 9 September 2010 19:15

So I'm guessing they don't call those lil waist pouches "fanny packs" in the UK lol

carleigh2424 0

Thursday 9 September 2010 19:02

Hahahhaaaaa!:)

Comments

zarazara_fml 0

Saturday 11 September 2010 6:42

Though I'd probably be embarrassed too if I was in your position, that sounds more like it should be her fml not yours now everyone thinks she has a huge ******

Lily_Loretta 0

Sunday 1 May 2011 0:17

That really made me laugh :p

xalerion 0

Saturday 11 September 2010 6:49

I like the people calling Americans lazy, stupid, and fat. i'm sure everyone in your country is a real cass

xalerion 0

Saturday 11 September 2010 6:53

*cassanova. the fml is amusing, but the broad labelling of the people of any country in a negative fashion by such simplistic people is rather unnecessary, especially since I doubt any here would immediately know all the customs, expressions, and vocabulary of any country they might visit.

spanelli 16

Saturday 11 September 2010 9:10

So, why is it that everyone hates America? You do realise that we're made up of immigrants from every other country because we actually have freedom. Why hate us because our armies come to your country's rescue every time you get ****** over? We wouldn't even be here if the Pilgrims from England hadn't sailed and established a colony here. It would still just be the Native American Indians.

spiderbesideher 0

Saturday 11 September 2010 15:20

they sometimes say "show your bits" for "show your ****"

Maxine17 8

Saturday 11 September 2010 15:40

Oh the old America vs Britain debate, hm? We both have different words. So? Neither is right or wrong, just what is accepable in your country. Also, both countries have their steroetypes. People think of Americans being fat, stupid and lazy. I'm sure this is not true. Yes, America has the highest obesity rate, but not EVERY SINGLE PERSON is fat. Come over to Britain and you'll find your share of fatties too. British people are perceived as snobby with bad teeth, and this also isn't true.People think this because we have the Queen and we don't have dental plans. Without America, England would be a hole. It wouldn't have most of the technology/T.V shows/Films and everything we have And without England, well Ameria wouldn't exist. WE ARE EQUAAAAAAL. BTW I'm English and wasn't biased.Win. Let's be peaceful, yeah?