Intimacy: Today, I was lying in bed with my boyfriend, telling him how...

By fml - 12/08/2011 06:14 - Canada

Today, I was lying in bed with my boyfriend, telling him how much I loved him. His answer? "Less lovin' more humpin'." This happens every single time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 874

You deserved it 30 594

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Same thing different taste

Humping

By needanotherbed - 28/05/2014 14:21 - United Kingdom - Ipswich

Today, I climbed into bed with my sleeping boyfriend after a long shift at work. He immediately rolled over, clamped my leg between his knees, and started viciously humping it. This is the fourth time now, and he still doesn't believe that he even does it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 437

You deserved it 6 204

By dummy - 17/02/2012 00:03 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky in bed. He mumbled something that sounded like "I love you." I replied "I love you too baby", to which he laughed then said, "I said I wanted you to blow me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 754

You deserved it 5 672

Exercise One

By blah - 02/06/2020 23:00

Today, while cuddling with my boyfriend, he started humping my leg and said, "I'm gonna hump the fatness out of you and make you beautiful." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 345

You deserved it 448

Not helping

By Anonymous - 19/06/2022 06:00 - Spain

Today, i told my boyfriend that I wasn't feeling emotionally well, and wanted cuddles. He proceeded to hump my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 929

You deserved it 1 315

By Anonymous - 14/03/2011 19:16 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 021

You deserved it 14 604

A little higher, dude

By Anonymous - 04/04/2022 14:00

Today, I was laying in bed with my boyfriend. He started caressing me, his eyes were closed, and he said, “I love touching your boobs.” Which was actually a roll of fat on my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 102

You deserved it 535

Fun fun fun

By But I love sex - 21/08/2025 03:00 - Czechia - Prague

Today, I asked my boyfriend why we never have sex anymore. He said, "Honestly, you lie there with your arms balled up against your chest, you don't moan or give any indication that you're enjoying things. It makes me really uncomfortable." FML

I agree, your life sucks 150

You deserved it 936

By jonnah - 05/03/2010 13:06 - Canada

Today, I told my boyfriend I loved him. His response? "Is that why you have been so clingy and annoying lately?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 714

You deserved it 5 298

By Anonymous - 19/06/2014 14:33 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was feeling unappreciated and asked my boyfriend if he loves me. He faltered and replied, "Uh, my dick does." FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 714

You deserved it 8 441

By Anonymous - 01/04/2011 04:32 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 752

You deserved it 36 385

silly_kitten 9

Friday 12 August 2011 16:14

That's when you say "Less humpin' more dumpin'."

zebraface 15

Friday 12 August 2011 16:08

Ditch his ass

Comments

shocky377_fml 0

Friday 12 August 2011 16:17

Thats something i might say.

enonymous 8

Friday 12 August 2011 16:17

Sounds like someone started to write his wedding vows... I'm jealous

DjeePee 24

Friday 12 August 2011 16:17

And you didn't correct him? More lovin' means more humpin'. If he never says he loves you and only wants sex, I would rename your role in this relationship: from 'partner' to 'friend with benefits'.