Love: Today, I realised I spend more time and receive more satisfaction... - FML

By Anonymous - 15/03/2010 17:38 - Ireland

Today, I realised I spend more time and receive more satisfaction talking on the phone with Chinese take away than talking to my wife in person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 173

You deserved it 23 575

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Same thing different taste

By oxbonxo - 07/02/2011 08:38 - Australia

Today, after hanging up the phone, I realised that telemarketers are my only form of social life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 604

You deserved it 6 169

By bloodshedblack - 21/02/2012 05:01 - United States

Today, I received more affection from my wife in a video game than I ever have in real life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 496

You deserved it 4 401

By phonebaby - 18/11/2014 01:04 - United States - Stamford

Today, my friend asked me to order take out for him because he gets nervous on phones. I called a Chinese restaurant, only to get nervous, and hang up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 601

You deserved it 7 663

By Anonymous - 19/02/2011 06:17 - United States

Today, I was so lonely, I wound up talking for two hours to the creep who calls my number every Friday night and makes creepy obscene breathing noises on the other end of the phone. Turns out he's a better listener than my husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 769

You deserved it 5 907

By Jakeok - 14/11/2014 00:04 - United States - Fraser

Today, I once again used my phone to get out of a conversation with someone, instead of actually talking to someone on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 418

You deserved it 7 646

Hindrance

By Anonymous - 18/08/2022 06:00

Today, I haven’t spoken to my husband in a week, and when I finally spoke to him he thanked me because he’s gotten so much work done round the house, caught up on all his paperwork for his job, and reconnected with his Xbox friends. I didn’t realise I was such a fucking distraction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 431

You deserved it 1 648

Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now

By Gloria Lovestar - 13/09/2019 20:00

Today, my husband explained that talking to me makes him miserable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 659

You deserved it 221

Awkward

By ChickenBallsPlease - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom - King's Lynn

Today, I was eating at a Chinese restaurant, when I stopped the waitress to tell her that even though I am of Chinese heritage, I can't understand a word of Chinese. After an awkward silence, she told me she was actually speaking English. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 769

You deserved it 16 858

Bad vibes

By Anonymous - 19/12/2023 12:00 - Switzerland - Riehen

Today, the evening phone conversations with my boyfriend, after I finished all my tasks, used to be the one thing I would be looking forward to all day. It would keep me going. Now, they feel like one more task, one more box to check before I can truly relax. FML

I agree, your life sucks 498

You deserved it 225

The one with the phone addiction

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, after feeling like I've been sucking as a friend and contacting a friend who has called me their best friend, but doesn't talk to me much, we grabbed a coffee. The whole time I was trying to have a conversation, she was on her phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 912

You deserved it 265

Next

Top comments

amayasoma 19

Monday 15 March 2010 23:53

Aww, poor you. How about discussing this with your wife and seeing if you and her can fix it.

sarcasMystic 0

Monday 15 March 2010 23:58

Imagine the Chinese guy's FML: "Today, I am beginning to get suspicious about one man who keeps calling for Chinese take-out and making conversation. He won't stop calling. FML."

Comments

StarryMoon1264 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 7:18

Wow. Have a fun time breaking that to her, asshole.

x805xUnknown 6

Tuesday 16 March 2010 8:09

Wow, grammar.

Powernade 1

Tuesday 16 March 2010 11:57

You're Irish, what did you expect? Find a few friends, and empty a few pints, answers will come.

redbeater 5

Tuesday 16 March 2010 14:39

WTF is Chinese Take Away?

amboBambo 0

Tuesday 16 March 2010 18:32

time to get yourself a new wife

bugmenotmofo 34

Tuesday 16 March 2010 21:08

I love ordering chinese food... but why are you calling your dinner?

ColdGold 6

Tuesday 16 March 2010 21:18

not good

goonie85 0

Wednesday 17 March 2010 3:11

I love Chinese takeout. It IS satisfying. The one I go to always knows what I want before I say it (caller ID I guess). How many spouses do that?!

fmlxxxx 0

Wednesday 17 March 2010 5:07

AND THEN?

jyd62 0

Wednesday 17 March 2010 5:40

wow that really sux since 90% of the time u can't understand those take out basturds

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