Intimacy: Today, I got home from working late and decided to write a cute... - FML

By Anonymous - 28/01/2011 19:59 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I got home from working late and decided to write a cute email to my girlfriend since I haven't seen her in two weeks. I was about to finish it off when my door swung open, and in a panic, I opened another tab to hide my email. It was porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 817

You deserved it 43 638

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Same thing different taste

Now watching

By Anonymous - 14/01/2011 23:07 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I came home, turned on my laptop, and turned the TV on mute so I could check my email. My mom came home an hour later, took a look at me on the couch, then the TV, and asked what on earth I was watching. I looked up from my laptop and realized it was porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 795

You deserved it 32 388

By Anonymous - 13/12/2009 08:39 - United States

Spicy

Today, I came home and saw my girlfriend on the computer. I decided to sex things up and sneak up on her naked from behind. Apparently, she was video-chatting with her friends at the time. They saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 971

You deserved it 25 400

By retard99 - 21/03/2010 04:04 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I was chatting with my girlfriend on MSN. I screen-copied my desktop to show her the conversation I was having with my best friend. Minutes later she replied asking why I had a porn site opened on the other tab. Oops. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 346

You deserved it 53 400

Busted

By Extended_desktop - 11/09/2011 17:53 - Poland

Spicy

Today, I got bored and decided to visit a porn site. I typed in the address and hit enter. A split second later, I realized I wasn't typing into the browser address bar, but in a chat window on my other screen. I'd been chatting with a girl I wanted to get with at the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 575

You deserved it 66 031

Team spirit

By Anonymous - 12/06/2018 05:00

Spicy

Today, I was sick, and decided to work from home. After coding for a few hours, I took a break, and being home alone, I watched porn. A few minutes later, I received messages from my colleagues telling me to shut it down. I had forgotten I was working on teamviewer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 155

You deserved it 7 585

By Anonymous - 31/07/2009 00:31 - United States

Spicy

Today, I decided to check my email on our family computer. Since my dad's account was already logged on, I chose to use his instead of logging on my own. When opening up a new page and seeing his recently viewed sites, I learned that he loves to watch porn. I also learned he has a foot fetish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 569

You deserved it 19 452

By Anonymous - 26/12/2014 22:38 - United States - Dearborn

Today, I was trying to show my family a cool website. Unfortunately my porn instincts kicked in and I started typing the URL of my favorite porn site. I couldn't stop myself before it autocompleted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 510

You deserved it 39 030

Out of it

By damn you Ambien - 03/08/2016 05:48 - United States - Los Angeles

Spicy

Today, I woke up to an angry and threatening email from a porn company. Apparently, I took a sleeping pill last night and wrote a nasty email to the company about how they mistreat women. The best part is that I used a web contact form instead of an email, so I have absolutely no idea what I wrote. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 403

You deserved it 2 809

Awkward

By Anonymous - 22/10/2011 23:26 - United States

Spicy

Today, my mother came into my room and had a thirty minute long conversation with me. She kept looking very nervous and uncomfortable. Only after she left did I realize that a porn site was open on my computer screen. The entire time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 291

You deserved it 51 696

By Anonymous - 09/06/2013 05:01 - United States

Spicy

Today, my wife decided to check her email, while I was still inside her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 346

You deserved it 13 185

Next

Top comments

Mirorbo 26

Saturday 29 January 2011 1:13

Am I the only one confused on why he felt he needed to hide the email?

roeallen 11

Saturday 29 January 2011 1:10

Was the **** your inspiration?

Comments

knightmare94 0

Sunday 3 July 2011 6:53

you shouldn't have to fap if you've got a girl though...?!

MegNGreg 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 6:11

awwwh man. **** ruins everything... o.o

geracam10 3

Wednesday 28 September 2011 2:07

Why would u have to hide an email in your own home?

Bleepbloop360 7

Tuesday 29 November 2011 2:28

I thought the exact same thing

tutti77 3

Saturday 21 April 2012 10:29

Don't be ashamed about the email, its nice, but how did you open **** that fast?

daniannie 22

Sunday 22 February 2015 0:20

seems like you might be watching too much ****, given that you impulsively felt the need to quickly switch tabs.. wtg

TisButAScratch 10

Monday 25 April 2016 18:17

Why the hell did you have **** open in the first place

randybryant799 20

Wednesday 13 October 2021 8:18

I'm not understanding why you were in a panic.

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

The Top

Today, I kissed my gorgeous new boyfriend for the first time. I ran my hands through his hair; a multitude of dandruff rained out and five lice crawled onto my hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 381

You deserved it 7 208

Today, my son's head teacher yelled down the phone at me, “I’m sorry but this is the last straw, Take him home now or I’m calling the police to remove him.” He’s 9 and this will be his sixth expulsion in 4 years, and we have no idea what caused this behaviour. He behaved just fine up to 4 years ago. FML

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You deserved it 436

Today, my wife screamed, cried, called me lazy and a bad parent, and threatened to leave and take our four kids. All I did was ask for an hour to myself every day for some private time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 661

You deserved it 1 263

Today, I left a party after drinking, and was soon pulled over. I frantically grabbed my mouthwash I keep for emergency situations to cover up the alcohol smell on my breath. I was given the breathalyzer almost immediately. I blew a 2.37. Apparently, alcohol is the main ingredient of Listerine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 386

You deserved it 300 415

Today, someone finally got the guts to punch my extremely rude mother in the face. My wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 147

You deserved it 3 804

Today, I found out that my "I don't care about boy problems" friend decided it would be a great idea to talk to my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend about me. My ex was the one who told me. He thought I'd asked my friend to do it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 380

You deserved it 118