Food Love This is America - FML

This is America

liz - - United States

Today, my 23-year old boyfriend is not talking to me because I bought the regular kind of macaroni and cheese instead of the cartoon kind. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Scary!

Anonymous - - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, all because he's scared of my mother. FML

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Insult to injury

Anonymous - - Canada

Today, my girlfriend of 3 years left me for a guy whose favorite color is camouflage. FML

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Never touch the Xbox

Unknown - - Canada

Today, I turned off my boyfriend's Xbox while he was playing because I wanted to talk to him about getting more serious with our relationship. As I did so, he said, "That's not the only thing you just turned off" and promptly broke up with me. FML

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That 20%

MI3 - - United States - Oakland

Today, I had to explain to my neighbor that not all black people are lactose intolerant. His eyes still bulge out every time I eat cheese. FML

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Sketchy

Wolf - - Trinidad and Tobago

Today, while sitting next to me, my boyfriend sent a text to one of his "friends" saying, "I'm thinking of you." FML

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Mummy's bravest little boy

Anonymous - - Australia - Hobart

Today, my boyfriend dumped me by getting his mum to message me on Facebook. I got the message while I was packing for an overseas trip to visit him. FML

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Secret

Anonymous - - United States - San Francisco

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's one year old. FML

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How could you?

Ashlee - - United States

Today, while on a date with my boyfriend, he broke up with me. The reason why? Because I took a dump in his bathroom and "that's inappropriate for girls." FML

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Turnaround

grrrr - - United States

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. Feeling bad, I texted him a few hours later apologizing. He said it was fine and that he went ahead and picked up a girl from the mall. FML

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Doofus

Coykoi - - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, not only did my boyfriend set my hair on fire, but he attempted to put it out by dumping bong water on my head. FML

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Richisme 0

Saturday 17 July 2010 1:12

alphabets and animals are awsome. ydi

skyttlz 32

Saturday 17 July 2010 1:16

cartoon kind tastes better

chaoguy789 4

Saturday 17 July 2010 2:36

o

chaoguy789 4

Saturday 17 July 2010 2:36

o

deadheroz 0

Saturday 17 July 2010 2:42

you heartless bastard

moon21_fml 0

Saturday 17 July 2010 2:51

YDI for being a Plain Jane

TheIrishJaneDoe 8

Saturday 17 July 2010 5:24

HEEEY! Nothin' wrong with us!

omega802 0

Saturday 17 July 2010 2:55

why didn't u get the cartoon once anyway!

GlaoigharAirm 0

Saturday 17 July 2010 2:57

You're a horrible person.

slapy 0

Saturday 17 July 2010 3:09

yeah that's a deal breaker lady

AMONALY920 0

Saturday 17 July 2010 3:12

to be honest, the cartoon ones do taste much better.

xcl0wdx 0

Saturday 17 July 2010 3:14

YDI, what the hell? u don't mess with a man's macaroni and cheese. I'm mad.

usmcbunny 0

Saturday 17 July 2010 3:15

You realize you deserve this, right? The poor man asked you for a simple thing, "Buy me macaroni... But the cartoon kind!" Everyone knows the cartoon kind is fun to play with, and tastes better. You're a horrible girlfriend. Tell your boyfriend to call me. I will buy him the good macaroni. 3:

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, a guy I've been dating for a year asked me to meet him for dinner and a couple of drinks. After dinner, he confessed that he's been seeing another woman and has decided he wants to seek a relationship with her. He then told me how sex with me is great, but he didn't want me to continue being "the other woman." FML

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Today, I ate one Benefiber gummy and spent half the day and good chunk of the night in misery with an upset stomach, where it felt like a lump was in it, as well as aggressive and painful gas, and painful diarrhea. FML

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Today, I have to listen to my flatmate complaining that ladies don’t shag him anymore since his dad in Saudi Arabia cut him off. Apparently, they show a lot of interest until he reveals his financial situation. The dude actually thought he was God's gift to women instead of a mobile ATM. What a tool. FML

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Today, after spending money on all the furniture and decor in our apartment, paying rent every month from my bank account, paying for all the groceries, and paying for all the dog supplies, my fiance asked why I don't keep saving thousands of dollars every month, while he pays for none of it. FML

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Today, it's been three days since I noticed mysterious bumps on my arms, on the same day my dad, who I lived with, petted dogs and might've brought in fleas. The first two days were harmless skin conditions. The third day was bug bites. They always appeared overnight when I slept and they weren't bed bugs, I checked. FML

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Today, my dad yelled at me for buying chunky peanut butter. He wanted smooth. Apparently he's "allergic to peanuts." I had to explain to him why his argument made no sense. FML

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