Miscellaneous Shit eating grin

Shit eating grin

lame - 31/12/2009 05:02 - Canada

Today, I ate a chocolate bar before getting my morning coffee. While waiting for it, a good looking guy started talking to me, then suddenly lost interest. Afterwards, I saw the chocolate on my face in my car mirror. FML

10 414

22 028

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Mouth malfunction

Melanie - 08/02/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I locked eyes with a cute barista and tried to flirt by giving a charming smile. I forgot I had just taken a sip of hot chocolate, so I ended up drooling a long stream of chocolate down my chin. FML

128

529

brenami - 31/12/2010 06:13 - United States

Today, I took my daughter to the grocery store. The bag boy seemed to be flirting with me and smiling. He had to be half my age. Once in the car I glimpsed myself in the rear view mirror. I had chocolate completely covering one of my front teeth. FML

22 959

7 762

Nice try

damn... - - United Kingdom

Today, I was at a job conference. At lunch, I saw this stunning guy. At dessert time, I coughed so much that the piece of chocolate cake in my mouth went straight onto his glasses. I think it's too late to introduce myself now. FML

35 155

6 413

anonymous - 05/05/2009 14:17 - United States

Today, a hot girl got into the elevator just as I took a bite out of my Three Musketeers bar. I instinctively smiled at her and chocolate drool poured out of my mouth. FML

29 395

59 730

Bad liar

pirotess31 - 31/07/2025 03:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I brought a huge chocolate bar to work, left it in the break room, and came back to find it gone. Later, I saw a coworker with chocolate all over his face and fingers. I asked him if he took it, and he said, in almost offended tone, “What? No, that’s mine.” FML

239

338

foreveralone - 13/01/2014 01:00 - United States - Franklin Park

Today, I went to the doctor, only to find out I can no longer eat chocolate, my favorite food. When I got home, my boyfriend took the chocolate cake I'd been eating from the fridge, sat down in front of me, and ate the whole thing without breaking eye contact. FML

57 265

7 156

Heavy session last night?

TaintedL0v3 - 11/03/2020 12:30 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I woke up with Chocolate Buttons superglued to my face. FML

1 228

227

rejected4ever - 14/02/2012 18:29 - United States

Today, for Valentine's Day, my boyfriend gave me the half-eaten chocolate bar that I left in his fridge two weeks ago. FML

28 588

4 204

Smooth

firstdategonebad - 12/10/2012 18:43 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I went on a coffee date with the man I've been in love with for a while. Before I knew what was going on, he'd started chatting up a pretty girl sitting nearby. I had to drink my coffee alone while he got her number. FML

26 985

2 595

Kamburgler - 02/07/2011 06:33 - United States

Today, this really cute guy at work kept flirting with me and cracking the funniest jokes. Before he left, he told me how much he enjoyed making me smile. An hour later, I saw my reflection in a mirror, I had a huge piece of food stuck in my teeth. FML

36 404

5 731

null_fml 11

Thursday 31 December 2009 12:06

How does chocolate on your face explain a SUDDEN lack of interest, if it had been there all along?

null_fml 11

Thursday 31 December 2009 12:19

Lol... "Damn! Missed my mouth... whoops! Missed it again!"

shinshoku13 19

Monday 20 February 2012 0:05

He could have told you -_-'

corleon198425 22

Wednesday 25 April 2012 9:17

Thats doo doo baby

judea95 16

Saturday 31 August 2013 10:54

How did you get chocolate all over yourself? Are you 6?

Imladris_fml 13

Thursday 17 April 2014 5:29

I don't understand how people get chocolate on their face, unless they're 1) A little kid. Or 2) Trying to shove chocolate bigger than their mouth, into their mouth.