Intimacy Pussy power - FML

Pussy power

Anonymous - 25/02/2013 17:57 - Canada - Fernie

Today, my fiancé is returning home, so I decided to wax myself, thinking things would get intimate. I warmed the wax strips and set them on the counter. Our cat jumped onto the counter and managed to roll onto one of the strips. Suffice to say, the wrong pussy got a painful waxing. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Flooftastic

Anonymous - 26/05/2024 22:00 - Australia

Today, I tried to wax my own Brazilian. My housemate’s cat rolled onto a half-used wax strip on the floor. The poor cat now has a small, less-fluffy patch, and I still haven’t figured out how to wax myself. FML

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Ugggggggggg - 06/11/2012 05:11 - United States - Lynnwood

Today, I woke up with a wax strip on my chest and my girlfriend sitting next to me on the bed laughing. She pulled the strip. I screamed. FML

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helpme - 15/07/2013 17:25 - Canada - Sudbury

Today, while waxing my bikini line, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me which caused me to close my legs. I am now sitting in the sink with my best friend pouring hot water "down there" trying to remove the wax. FML

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Nickolas - 31/12/2010 05:58 - United States

Today, I was getting my chest waxed. The woman dipped the stick into the wax and hit her elbow, making wax fall into my eyes. FML

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waxer150 - 22/03/2015 22:32 - United States - Ashtabula

Today, while waxing a client's chest, I forgot to have him turn his head. When I ripped the strip, I punched him in the face. FML

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coolcat10156 - 08/07/2015 07:04 - United States - Keller

Today, while waiting the required 5 minutes for my hair removal cream to work, my cat rubbed all over my legs while I wasn't looking. After getting clawed to death throwing her in the bath to get the cream off, all her hair on that side fell off. I now have a half hairless cat. FML

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Waxing pubical

Anonymous - 10/10/2019 16:00

Today, I was waxing my legs and somehow dropped an enormous dollop of hot wax on my naked crotch. I refused to yank it off, but still had to cut it off with scissors. So now I have a huge patch of pubic hair way shorter than the rest of it. It looks a right mess FML

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Anonymous - 18/04/2012 19:18 - United Kingdom - Eynsham

Today, I attempted to wax my "lady area". It hurt more than losing my virginity. FML

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Beauty standards

Anonymous - 08/05/2023 03:00

Today, my boyfriend snuck up behind me while I was naked and whispered in my ear to bend over. I thought this was a lead up to doggy style but nope, he slapped a waxing strip on my exposed bum hole and ran off yelling, “No more hairy hole! No more hairy hole!” FML

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iliku - 01/06/2019 02:00

Today, I was having a romantic evening with my new boyfriend, until we walked into my bedroom and discovered that my cat had ripped apart my pads and had spread them all over the place. FML

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zingline89 18

Monday 25 February 2013 23:15

Thank you, OP, for making a pussy reference in the FML. It spared us from a half a dozen bad ones in the comments.

SHAMUS_the_WITTY 18

Monday 25 February 2013 23:10

Full or Brazillian?

ThisGuysSkills 5

Thursday 28 February 2013 9:15

smoke a premo it is ******* awesome

itszlo 8

Wednesday 13 March 2013 5:45

Poor pussy!

seabassofthesea 3

Monday 12 August 2013 15:07

Hahaha that's awesome

irgndsondepp 15

Tuesday 26 November 2013 16:06

More like FYCL!

Jebitesevsi 11

Tuesday 21 January 2014 22:07

That's one cat, who isn't going near counters any time soon. Or wax.

hrmvanilla 2

Sunday 13 September 2015 5:48

You could have just cut it off stupid

AlbinoMoose987 14

Wednesday 28 September 2016 23:35

Why didn't you cut it off?!?!

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, after my family left me at home for the weekend before finals while they went on vacation so I could focus on my studies, I spent the weekend watching my little cousins for no pay. It wasn’t an easy babysitting job either. I had to pay attention to and then re-enact basically every Bluey episode ever to exist, with no time to study. FML

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Today, my son is actually going on holiday over Christmas with some girl he met in a bar. He’s barely known her a week and is already dipping into his savings to keep her happy. FML

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Today, my boyfriend broke up with me and while trying to make a dramatic exit, I slammed his car door, slipped on the ice and landed on my back in front of a large crowd of onlookers. FML

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Today, as I was bent over drying my legs after a shower, my girlfriend snuck behind me and pulled a hair off my ballsack for absolutely no good reason. FML

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Today, during a family dinner with my grandparents, I showed them some pictures. One was a picture of my brother, my boyfriend and me. Apparently, the idea of me having a boyfriend didn’t register with them because they all screamed, “Your brother is gay?!” FML

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Today, I woke up to my lovely 16-month old with her diaper on. When I stood up to retrieve and toss it, I also realized she'd pooped into her hand and thrown a log onto the middle of the floor. FML

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