Kids, Poopoo peepee Work Here, have a Turner Prize - FML

Here, have a Turner Prize

RunningMurphy - 15/05/2009 07:20 - United States

Today, at work, some little girl went in the bathroom for quite a while. Came out for two minutes and went back in. She then came out with her finger clutched in a paper towel. One of the other coworkers went in to check the bathroom. The little girl wrote "Hi!" with her own poop. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Primitive art

Anonymous - 19/04/2021 00:30

Today, I went to check on my 2 year-old daughter in her playroom, since she was being awfully quiet. I walk in to see her finger painting with her own feces on her kiddie table. FML

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Username - 17/03/2011 04:04

Today, my daughter went potty. Just as she always does, she came up to me and announced, "I flushed, and wiped, and shut the light off." Then she did something brand new. She covered my face with her hand and asked, "Do these fingers smell?" They did. FML

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thisreallyhappened - 15/05/2009 02:39 - United States

Today, a little girl at my work had an accident. She asked me to help her change, and as she was changing she stuck her hand in her vagina to make sure all the "peepee was gone". She then put that same hand on my face to balance herself as she finished changing. FML

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Cultus - 05/06/2018 19:00

Today, I went into the tanning room at work, where the lady in there last had decided the trash can was a toilet and pooped in it. Before she sat, she took the time to wrap the edges in paper towels, I guess in case anyone else had done this before her. I had to clean it up. FML

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Shidding and farding

Anonymous - 07/09/2021 08:01

Today, I was babysitting my friend's two year-old daughter. Within 15 minutes, she had crawled out of her crib, taken off her diaper, and smooshed her poop in between the cracks in the floor. I put her in the tub, left to get a towel, and came back to her pooping in the tub. FML

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Work sucks

Anonymous - 08/07/2011 19:43 - United States

Today, I'd just finished cleaning the bathrooms at work when I saw a young boy go in. Of course, I thought nothing of it until I had to use the bathroom myself ten minutes later. The kid had taken a shit and missed the toilet completely. FML

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Anonymous - 14/05/2019 02:00

Today, at work, I came back from my break to find a child covered in mud. Turns out it wasn't mud. One of the other children had taken all of the poop out of their diaper and smeared it all over the floor, walls, and other children. The other teacher hadn't noticed, and I had to clean it all up. FML

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shyshy96679 - 20/06/2011 22:42 - United States

Today, I was using the restroom when a little girl tried to open my stall. It was locked, so she slid under the door and tried to have a conversation with me while I was pooping. FML

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Bathroom menace

Shelly - 07/06/2009 02:25 - United States

Today, I used the restroom at a department store. While I was in my stall, I overheard a little girl say to her mother, "I see someone wearing pink!" I remembered that I was wearing pink just as she finished her thought, "…and she's pooping." She was peeking at me through the stall. FML

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sdasdflkjas - 30/05/2009 04:24 - United States

Today, while the kid I was babysitting was in the bathroom, he called to me "I need some help in here." Worried I ran to the bathroom and asked him what was wrong. He needed me to wipe his butt. As if that weren't gross enough, just as my hand was under his butt, he pooped again and laughed. FML

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Sessee 4

Friday 15 May 2009 20:03

Aw, how sweet, she watches 2 girls 1 cup.

Big_Blue_Sumthin 0

Friday 15 May 2009 20:04

Nothing says love like messages wrote with your own feces.

GeometricAngle 7

Thursday 25 June 2009 6:03

lol, this happened at my old school in 4th grade, the bad thing is, nobody ever found out who did it.

telli164 30

Saturday 28 June 2014 15:28

It was you, wasn't it?

elliekinslurvsya 0

Thursday 6 August 2009 3:51

only an FML if you had to clean it up

lalaroo 0

Saturday 8 August 2009 8:12

Cute! How can you not love children?

AtoZandBeyond 0

Monday 7 September 2009 3:18

LOL you should have taken a pic and posted on Failblog

gra_k 0

Monday 12 October 2009 4:03

this is an fml whyy??

Judokalikewhoa 0

Monday 8 February 2010 6:21

Sounds like you work at an IKEA Smaland.....

wasted0087 0

Wednesday 10 February 2010 2:26

Janitor?

rends 0

Thursday 24 June 2010 3:25

I was eating chocolate ice cream while reading this.

SANNIEPANTS 0

Wednesday 7 July 2010 21:26

uh growdie. why would someone touch poop.

Silver791 0

Wednesday 13 April 2011 6:33

duke nukem ftw

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Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I was at the mall with my 7-year-old granddaughter. When we entered a clothing store, she pulled me back, saying loudly, "Grandma! This is 'Forever 21'! 'Currently 58' is down that way!" I blame my son for this little troll. FML

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Today, my son brought home his Muslim girlfriend and I had to watch my husband almost physically restraining himself from making a racist comment, especially since she was wearing a headscarf. No, I was not aware he was this much of a racist when I married him. FML

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Today, I found out that even though I suffer from insomnia most days, I can sleep within 5 minutes of studying Solid Mechanics, especially when I have an end term the next day. FML

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Today, my brother's girlfriend texted my dad, letting him know they'd got married a few weeks ago. This wouldn't be so bad if we hadn't driven 6 hours to see them yesterday to celebrate their engagement and discuss potential wedding plans, while they went along with it. They even suggested dates. FML

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Today, I fell going down the stairs and hit my head on the wall. My parents came frantically running to my side, but only to make sure I hadn't damaged the wall. FML

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Today, my car crashed and the only refuge was at a nearby house, the resident of which was a crazy psycho. Now replace "crazy psycho" with "crazy ex-girlfriend who won't help you unless you compose a poem about how much you love her." FML

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