Teachers

OP here. OP here. My coworker and I quit. I have gone back a few times since and it is always somber there now. The people in charge have a way of killing everyone's spirits even the students. They were always/usually happy when I was there That section of the school lost half the employees in less than 18 months. I was the most recent one to quit. I don't know about the other areas because I don't go there. Anyway we started our own buisness so hopefully in a few years things will be going well. I will probably post again then.

Nitpicking

By Unteachable - 08/02/2017 06:00 - United States

Today, as a high school English teacher, I had to read submissions for a writing contest. The entries were filled with words like "irregardless", "could of", "acrost", and "ain't". These papers were supposedly written by the best students in the school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 320

You deserved it 816

Brain melt

By hashtag67 - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff

Today, I taught my first seminar as a teaching assistant. I prepared for hours and rehearsed and discussed it with the professor. Two students fell asleep, I said "shit" twice and I froze mid-sentence, then said, "Sorry guys, I have no idea what I'm saying." FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 568

You deserved it 1 714

Back to school

By This generation is lost! - 19/08/2024 15:00 - United States - Anaheim

Today, it’s only the first week of school and already I’ve confiscated five vapes, ended makeup tutorials along with full pallets and contour kits, broken up three fist fights, and had to remind the class of the importance of keeping one’s clothes on during school. I teach fourth grade. FML

I agree, your life sucks 508

You deserved it 57

Weird interaction

By Yue - 23/11/2009 21:14 - Canada

Today, I went over to my best friend's house only to have his little brother run up to us and confess his love to me. His little brother is twelve and I've tutored him for a year. I'm seventeen and male. Now my best friend thinks I 'taught' him something weird. He won't talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 614

You deserved it 2 634

Filtered

By Anonymous - 09/11/2024 20:00 - United States - Monterey

Today, as a teacher, I was grading some essays when I yet again came across the word "unalive" when discussing the assassinations of JFK and Abraham Lincoln. As in, "JFK was unalived." I know language inevitably mutates over time, but us teachers don't have demonetization filters. FML

I agree, your life sucks 500

You deserved it 88

Cool moves

By Anonymous - 18/10/2024 11:00

Today, on my first day as a substitute teacher in a high school, I split the seam of my trousers in front of 30 teenagers. I had nothing spare so I spent the rest of the school day with my raincoat tied around my waist hiding it. I’m here for two weeks and already I’ve lost their respect FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 90

By Anonymous - 17/10/2013 13:43 - United States - Romulus

Today, in calculus, our substitute teacher told me I was smart. Everybody in the class, including my friends, burst out laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 866

You deserved it 4 743

Record breaking

By musicteacher - 12/03/2015 10:23 - United States - Bethania

Today, I've managed to go my whole nine-year teaching career without anyone vomiting in my classroom. That record was broken today when someone vomited four successive times in front of a class of 46 students. It was me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 464

You deserved it 2 929

Bad influence

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Singapore

Today, my son told his teacher that she "has a nice rack." He's four. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 436

You deserved it 12 017

You little shit

By UN4 - 27/05/2015 16:25 - United States

Today, one of my students tried to bribe me $200 to change his grade. When I said no and told him he was lucky I didn't report him, he went to the dean and told him I offered to change his grade for money. I'm now suspended and under investigation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 766

You deserved it 3 428

By stupid - 24/12/2018 18:00

Today, after turning in a paper that I worked really hard on, I got it back with a grade of 0. In the feedback section, my professor wrote: “In all my 37 years of teaching, this is by far the worst essay I have ever read.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 673

You deserved it 710

She's lost control again

By Anonymous - 02/07/2019 13:01 - United States - Pomona

Today, at the ripe old age of 23, I now no longer have no control over my farts when I cough. My many young students find this hilarious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 619

You deserved it 187

A tad unfair

By Anonymous - 02/04/2021 14:01

Today, my parents have made it very clear to me that if I fail one more assignment, they’re disowning me. I got a zero on a paper that I poured my heart and soul into, and in the notes, the teacher wrote, “I don’t even need to read this paper to know that it is bad.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 270

You deserved it 168

No good deed…

By Anonymous - 20/12/2024 23:00 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, before I washed my husband’s stinky work jacket, I made sure to check the pockets. What I didn’t realise was that there was another pocket which had two USB sticks with all of his students’ work on them. The guilt trip has been going on for hours, and I’m 39 weeks pregnant, stressed out of my mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 557

You deserved it 223

Class of 2010

By jessii - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, in math class, I got an answer "wrong." The teacher yelled at me, then he realized that my answer was correct. Then he yelled at me for not correcting him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 649

You deserved it 3 217

Blackout

By Nicholasand - 23/11/2009 18:29 - United Kingdom

Today, I woke up in a closet of a four-star hotel, having spent the night drinking. I'm a secondary school teacher and I've been visiting this place on a school trip. My flight left at 4 a.m. this morning and it's now 1 p.m. in the afternoon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 192

You deserved it 61 343

Tense

By Anonymous - 23/05/2020 17:00

Today, my dad happened to mention he proposed to his girlfriend, who I had no idea he was dating. Turns out it's one of my old high school teachers, specifically the bitch who hated me as much as I hated her. My dad is so oblivious, he has no idea WWIII is about to start in our living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 321

You deserved it 258

Barely legal

By nikki - 04/01/2022 14:01 - United States - Federal Way

Today, my biology teacher subscribed to my OnlyFans. This wouldn’t be weird if the last time I saw or spoke to him wasn't my freshman year of high school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 640

You deserved it 1 961

Wrong target

By footinmouth - 21/01/2009 23:15 - United States

Today, I was hitting on a girl who was getting ready to walk into the same class as me. We were waiting outside the room, so I told her that I'd heard the professor for the course was a total bitch. We walked into the room. I sat down at a desk. She stood behind the podium. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 924

You deserved it 38 891

Never sneak up

By Anonymous - 26/01/2022 14:01

Today, I was listening to some music before school started, which is why I didn't hear my teacher sneak up behind me. When she laid her hand on my shoulder, of course I accidentally punch her in the face. Her nose bled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 621

You deserved it 883

America, hell yeah brother

By Anonymous - 03/10/2012 23:00 - United States - Tallahassee

Today, my teacher's comments on my essay read, "I know it's college, but you use a lot of unnecessary words with a lot of syllables." He basically scolded me for having a complex vocabulary. I go to an accredited state university. Nothing says "America" like under-achieving professors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 340

You deserved it 8 347

Disappointing

By Anonymous - 01/07/2022 12:00

Today, I bumped into a former teacher, one who spent many many weeks helping me get into university so I could become a psychologist. I had to see the look of disappointment on her face when I told her I got pregnant freshman year, and became a stay at home mom with a part time job at Tesco’s. FML

I agree, your life sucks 396

You deserved it 1 396

A little less conversation…

By IPityTheStool - 09/06/2011 13:22 - United Kingdom

Today, I used the staff toilets at school. As I sat down, I heard a sudden plop, followed by the stench of diarrhoea from the next cubicle. It was followed by, "I do apologise!" It was my English teacher. Then we continued to chat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 518

You deserved it 7 627

Running

By Anonymous - 18/11/2021 08:00 - United States - Yorktown

Today, I'm a teacher and was diagnosed with a sinus infection and UTI. The doctor warned me the two antibiotics may cause the runs. My doctor was right, they did, during class. I made it to the bathroom, did the deed, only to find out there was no toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 998

You deserved it 93

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The Top

Today, I received yet another letter from a relative bitching me out for not involving my parents in my wedding. The parents who showed no interest in our relationship and then yelled at my fiancé and me when we announced it to them, calling us stupid, naive, heathens, and mentally ill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 089

You deserved it 1 749

Today, my son and I were arguing, and my wife yelled at us that the reason we don't get along is because we have identical personalities. She then kicked us out until we learn to get along, so we're sleeping in the freezing caravan, sharing a blanket that's only 6 feet wide and was last used for the cat to give birth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 346

You deserved it 1 292

Today, I put my 3 year old down for her regular nap. About an hour later I wake up from a dream where I was smelling something awful. When I woke up, the smell was still there, so I tracked it down. My daughter had decided to "fingerpaint" with the contents of a dirty diaper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 206

You deserved it 6 263

Today, I thought my knee hurt because of over exercising in the gym. Then I remembered it was because I smacked it against my chair so hard I crumbled down and couldn't move for 5 minutes. And how I remembered? I did it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 119

You deserved it 2 079

Today, my now ex-girlfriend tried to claim that because she was raised by hippies with a free love belief that she’s entitled to that belief, but I’m not. Basically she was saying she’s allowed to cheat with any guy she wants, but if I even looked at another woman she’d chop my dick off. DUMPED. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 599

You deserved it 185

Today, my mother told me she wanted me to get an exorcism. Yes, she was serious. I'm Jewish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 531

You deserved it 3 720