Relatable

A rock and a hard place

By Anonymous - 27/01/2025 06:00 - United States - Orange Park

Today, I’ve been having an affair with my cousin’s husband for the last 16 years. For 3-ish months, when my husband gets drunk, he accuses us of cheating & threatens to tell everyone. Sober, he remembers nothing. We are constantly worried he will tell but are too in love to end it. Both in bad marriages. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110

You deserved it 1 906

Did Kris Jenner put you up to this?

By Anonymous - 12/08/2023 10:00

Spicy

Today, my wife wanted to spice things up by making a sex tape. Not sure if it was excitement or just the pressure of being on camera, but the whole thing was less than 4 minutes, including foreplay and apologising, and due to bad camera placement most of the film was of my asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 530

You deserved it 218

The grey zone

By Anonymous - 26/06/2022 18:00

Today, man do I feel old. For the first time ever, a teen thug with more acne spots than brain cells told me to, “Piss off grandad.” Grandad? Guess I look older than I feel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 781

You deserved it 97

Bathtime

By Claire - 13/01/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I tried to get some "quality me-time" by taking a bubble bath. Ten minutes in, my needy cat started howling like it was the end of the world, so I jumped out to see what was happening. Nothing. She's just going to do that every time I try to take a bath. No relaxing allowed, it seems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 314

You deserved it 191

Lonely boy

By Anonymous - 31/01/2022 17:00

Today, I sprayed a woman's perfume on a pillow, just so it would be easier for me to pretend I have someone to hug and cuddle with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 897

You deserved it 263

The future is bleak

By Anonymous - 12/03/2022 10:00

Today, I just bought my own house after divorcing my wife of 30 years. We'd been childless by her choice, and as I stood in my new living room, looking at the emptiness, I couldn’t help the feeling I just bought a 2-storey, £125,000 coffin that I’ll one day die alone and be buried in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 116

You deserved it 322

Wingman

By Anonymous - 05/12/2022 02:00

Today, I finally got to spend a good amount of time with this girl I had been trying to get with for weeks, only to realize I wasn't that into her. I asked my friend for help and he proceeded to literally drag me away from her, while I pretended to try and stop him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 162

You deserved it 1 213

So frustrating!

By Anonymous - 27/01/2024 14:00 - United States - Queens

Spicy

Today, for the third night in a row, I got cockblocked by my 10 month-old not sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 265

You deserved it 482

It's not you, it's me

By DyingAlone - 14/12/2021 23:01

Today, I met the guy my ex left me for. He's morbidly obese, has no personality, and got her drinking again, even though she has a problem. She says, "I've never been happier." Now everything I've done for my anxiety and depression has come undone, and I can't be convinced there isn't something horribly wrong with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 428

You deserved it 282

Dark

By bloomrosalind8976 - 02/05/2021 16:59

Today, I admitted to my SO that I wanted to kill myself. They told me it was abusive to tell them that, and claimed I was just using it as a tool to control them. What they don't know is I attempted it by overdosing the other day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 232

You deserved it 250

Better late than never

By Anonymous - 15/12/2023 00:00 - United States

Today, it's been a year since the man I loved for more than a decade moved in with me. I felt so lucky at the time, only to suddenly notice more and more that he's a huge racist. Against MY race. Bye bye decades of my wasted time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 595

You deserved it 257

Mr Popular

By Loner - 18/10/2021 23:00

Today, I threw a goodbye party because I'm going to live to Chile soon. Nobody came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 066

You deserved it 140

Countdown

By Anonymous - 27/05/2023 02:00 - Australia

Today, I took my regular shit, like clockwork. Same time, every single day. Unfortunately, that time is midnight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 664

You deserved it 143

That's their goal

By your_uglyness - 01/08/2021 05:59

Today, I’m so ugly, I had to pay for more likes on Tinder because I ran out of them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 601

You deserved it 369

Every cat owner hears you

By Anonymous - 06/03/2023 12:00

Today, I spent an hour cleaning up cat hair from every surface in my house, only for my cat to immediately jump up on the counter and shed her fur all over again. I guess I'll just admit defeat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 547

You deserved it 391

The precious truck

By Anonymous - 05/09/2021 11:00

Today, I got fired because, while responding to an emergency page for the volunteer fire department to help find a man in a field with a gunshot wound, I backed into a rock with the company truck that I drive to and from work. Nobody asked about the guy with the bullet inside him. He's OK now, in case anyone cares. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 008

You deserved it 171

You're not in the army now, oh oh ohoh

By Anonymous - 13/04/2022 18:00

Today, my son was booted out of the army after one week for laziness, giving attitude to his training sergeant, sheer bloody stupidity, and asking the man who ran the on base shop if he could score weed anywhere on base. Even the army can’t sort out this asshole I gave birth to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 996

You deserved it 501

Cry for help

By Anonymous - 01/02/2024 18:00 - United States - Greenwich

Today, honestly, I feel like my life has lost meaning. At some certain point I have lost all emotion and am just covering myself with a mask of happiness. It feels like I’m just trying to escape my own reality, with my parents on the verge of divorce. Somewhere in the last few months it’s been getting worse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 551

You deserved it 145

Landlords gonna landlord

By Anonymous - 07/11/2021 17:00

Today, after a year of moving to a new country, getting our kids settled into the new education system, and our commutes sorted, our landlord notified us that he needs the house back for his son. There are no similar rentals or properties for sale in the region. We have to start over somewhere else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 273

You deserved it 121

Terminally online

By Anonymous - 13/08/2022 10:00 - United Kingdom - Swansea

Today, I came home to see my dad sitting in his car. I thought it'd be fun to sneak up on him. He was filming himself on his phone, ranting about "fighting like hell" and "a storm coming." He had his baseball cap on backwards, probably because the front had the name of our town in Wales on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 765

You deserved it 162

He's got the look

By Anonymous - 12/05/2022 15:00 - United States - Steele

Today, my uncle visited for the first time in three years. It would have been very wholesome, if not for the fact that I got to see for myself just how badly his health has deteriorated. He's morbidly obese, a heavy smoker, and his voice is terrifying. I almost thought he was a pedophile when I first saw him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 773

You deserved it 191

Actor's Studio

By biggieT - 14/06/2012 02:21 - Sri Lanka - Colombo

Spicy

Today, I was having sex with my wife, when she fell asleep. She then woke up and started moaning, clearly faking an orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 126

You deserved it 7 610

Leech

By Anonymous - 13/06/2022 00:00

Spicy

Today, my daughter broke up with her boyfriend and moved back in with me, because he kept doing things like inviting her on dates, trying to talk to her, and even, god forbid, trying to have sex with her. All this apparently got in the way of her watching anime 24/7. I'm never getting rid of her, am I? FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 324

You deserved it 501

Sit down, old man

By Anonymous - 23/06/2022 22:00

Today, my husband is sulking because our daughter's first boyfriend is a rugby-playing giant he can’t scare away with the standard father's threat of a good beating unless he treats our daughter well. I married a real idiot manchild. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 011

You deserved it 307

CPTSD

By Made to be miserable - 06/08/2022 09:00 - United States

Today, I realized my parents are pretty much single-handedly responsible for all of the mental illnesses and personality disorders I have now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 810

You deserved it 277

Lonesome

By AwesomePGnarles - 13/02/2009 08:17 - United States

Today, I realized that I know more about the history of the Transformers than I do about talking to women. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 710

You deserved it 44 507

Open to interpretation

By Anonymous - 13/09/2024 06:11 - Belgium

Today, I found out why my ex of three years started an argument with me that quickly lead to our break-up. He said he would be talking to people of a different race to make life "easier." I should've seen the fact that he dislikes our own race from prior conversations. He ended up getting into a relationship two months later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 504

You deserved it 325

nm1545 tells us more.

nm1545 9

Thursday 12 September 2024 13:27

Op here – For some context: we’re both black. During the relationship he would mention how he didn’t like when black women would do certain things or just talk down on things I did and say “This is why you shouldn’t date black women/should date this instead.” When meeting right before our breakup he mentioned that he would probably be dating a Hispanic or white woman next because it would be easier. I don’t care what race he dates, do you! I just don’t respect him saying he thinks certain demographics are less aggressive when there’s all types of personalities in any race. I say this because when we first got together he told me his ex wasn’t black and ended up stabbing him. As far as the breakup - I believe he was talking to her before we broke up. They got together quickly after we called it quits and it surprised me.

Unexpected

By Matt988 - 22/03/2021 23:00 - India

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend when I felt her slip her hand into my pants. She then gave me a wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 920

You deserved it 292

You probably can say them here

By A little help - 14/01/2024 17:00 - United States - Little Rock

Today, I went on a few websites to ask for donations for a cheap car part, due to my husband not able to work due to COVID, and we live paycheck to paycheck. I've never had so many only negative comments basically calling me a piece of crap and other words I can't say on here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 380

You deserved it 469

Suspicious minds

By Anonymous - 15/05/2016 22:25 - United States - Phoenixville

Today, my college instructor told me I hadn't actually failed a big exam as he originally said. It turns out he'd mixed me up with another student. Now thanks to the power of gossip, half my class thinks I slept with him so he'd switch my grade with the other student's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 717

You deserved it 1 366

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FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

The Top

Today, while working at a gas station, I accidentally changed the price of gas to 8.9 cents per litre. It took me fifteen minutes to figure out why everyone wanted only two or three dollars of gas. I fixed it, but now my managers are debating charging me for lost revenue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 429

You deserved it 7 123

Today, I tore through my apartment looking for my wallet. I was late for work, sweating, panicking, and blaming the cat. After 45 minutes, I found it. In the fridge. Next to the cheese. No explanation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 133

You deserved it 358

Today, it was my first Grindr hookup (I know, I know…) and I ended up getting catfished by some random dude. I decided to just have a walk and get over it, but then I got followed by another random dude for 30 minutes. I can now confidently say I hate men. FML

I agree, your life sucks 322

You deserved it 148

Today, I was in a restroom, reading this site, when another gentleman walked in. He washed his hands, dried them, nodded at me, then left. It wouldn't ordinarily be so weird, except I was in a one-person restroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 203

You deserved it 8 952

Today, I finally met my dream woman: a smokin’ hot green-eyed petite redhead. Or so I thought. I met her online and “she” turned out to be a 22 year-old guy trolling me. The worst part is that I separated from my wife for this girl. She won’t take me back no matter how much I beg and plead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 127

You deserved it 4 164

Today, I went out with this girl I really liked and she came back to my place. Things were heating up and we ended up having sex. I was on top and really into it but in the middle of it she held up her wrist and said, "Huh, look at the time, I gotta get home." She wasn't wearing a watch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 779

You deserved it 17 938