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Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Confused

    Paranoia

    By BoohooBouquet - 19/03/2017 14:00

    Today, my girlfriend got super paranoid when I received flowers, along with a card saying what a "lovely time" the sender had last weekend. My girlfriend decided this was proof I'd cheated on her. The card was signed "Vanessa," which is also her mother's name. Who stayed with us last weekend. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 7 172
    You deserved it 498
    Share  

    By 635CSi - 06/06/2012 05:23 - United States - San Diego

    Today, my father-in-law called me an idiot for buying him coffee cake because he can't have caffeine. He refuses to believe that there's as much coffee in coffee cake as there is ham in a hamburger. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 25 139
    You deserved it 2 999
    Share  

    Like a virgin

    By chchboy - 22/05/2012 05:05 - United States

    Spicy Spicy
    Today, I went all the way for the first time with my girlfriend. After I had finished, she asked me, "What just happened? Was that sex?" I wasn't sure either. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 35 184
    You deserved it 7 134
    Share  

    Love is love, dude

    By lonelyengineer - 19/12/2010 10:28 - Germany

    Today, I sat in the cafeteria at work and saw a girl, which is a rare sight at my workplace, from the back with a beautifully long ponytail. After a full hour of building up courage to perhaps say hi to her, she turned around. It was a 50-year-old man. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 16 038
    You deserved it 32 221
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    Health Relatable Allergies Money Technology Instagram Animals Cute Kids Music Love Neighbours NSFW Intimacy Medication Family Miscellaneous Friends Confused Toxic Pranks Parents Sports Scams Religion Cheating Parenting Dating Work Painful
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, my mom texted me in the middle of my end of term math exam, saying it was extremely urgent and needed me to come home ASAP. While skipping my exam, I finally got home to find out my mom forgot what the emergency was. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 35 813
    You deserved it 6 170
    Today, my son wants to go to Norway for our holiday and my husband wants to go to Disneyland, so of course they decide they can only choose by having a Nerf battle through the entire house. Meanwhile, I seem to be the only one taking anything seriously. This is why I despair of both of them. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 390
    You deserved it 793
    Today, I was messing with my cat by moving my hand around under the sheets to make it look like a mouse, making him pounce at it. Without thinking, I brought my hand up to scratch my nose and was immediately attacked by flailing claws. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 10 524
    You deserved it 28 664
    Today, I was t-boned by a car that sent mine flying into five parked cars. My car was totalled. As the person who hit me pulled me out of the right side of the car he said, "Sorry. I sneezed." FML
    I agree, your life sucks 39 145
    You deserved it 2 806
    Today, I was getting catcalled downtown by a guy I've never seen before. Then he told me he knows where I live, and accurately described my apartment while he followed me for 2 blocks. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 1 414
    You deserved it 98
    Today, I got asked to Homecoming by the person I really like. I said yes and I was really excited. But my best friend who has liked me since the 6th grade wasn't. He went and broke my date's jaw. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 44 338
    You deserved it 7 774
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