Annoying

Yapping and chirping

By My headphones were busted - 08/05/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, I was stuck on a packed interstate bus for hours next to 2 complete strangers, even to each other, have an debate about the "Drake and Kendrick beef." They even tried to drag me into it, so… if you happen to read this and recognize yourselves, I was the guy in a white UA hoodie pretending not to speak English. FML

I agree, your life sucks 430

You deserved it 96

Did you get your shots?

By It_gets_better - 02/12/2021 04:59

Today, my 75 year-old grandparents, who stubbornly refuse to be vaccinated, asked me to pick up their meds after they got COVID. I left work early to avoid the pharmacy line. After dropping them off, their pharmacy called: they didn't give me all of the meds, so I had to go back and wait another two hours in line. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 331

You deserved it 266

There's always that one friend…

By seriously? - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff

Today, my best friend actually had the audacity to try and one-up my suicide attempt story. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 334

You deserved it 10 697

Some fans take it too far

By Anonymous - 12/06/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I finally figured out what two kids in my neighborhood have been yelling for what seems like the past month. I don't know where they are exactly, so my efforts to get them to knock it off has almost made me go insane, all from hearing them yell "CHICKEN JOCKEY!" over and over again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 364

You deserved it 70

Touch me I'm sick

By Anonymous - 06/11/2022 22:00 - Germany

Today, I went to the doctor with some serious physical symptoms that amount to being effectively disabled. She didn’t even ask any questions or examine me before telling me it was all purely psychological. I barely managed to convince her to at least order some blood tests, as a formality. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 018

You deserved it 137

Misophonia

By Phyllis - 30/01/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, it's almost a week since our intern started. We have an open plan office, so I can't help but hear her talk excitedly. This wouldn't be a bad thing if she didn't stop saying "it's giving…" and "like" every ten words. Our company doesn't allow headphones, so I'm stuck in hell, which, like, is giving, like, you know, pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 466

You deserved it 121

Some people just shouldn't have roommates

By Good Night, USA - 11/12/2022 20:00 - United States

Today, I've made it clear to my roommate that I go to the bed at the same time every night, and that I need absolute peace and quiet from that point onward. Apparently, he misheard it as, "Watch American Dad until midnight, and possibly beyond." That theme song is gonna make me go nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 539

You deserved it 1 336

Leave me alone!

By Anonymous - 24/02/2023 05:30 - Canada

Today, I still can't open my curtains or door without ADHD teenage neighbour screaming my name and waving from my across the road. I moved from a city to this place so I could have a big garden to help my extreme social anxiety. When I go outside, she comes running over. Sometimes she brings her dog, who shits on my lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 923

You deserved it 174

Killjoy was hear

By barsituation - 03/01/2022 11:01 - United States

Today, I got kicked out of my favorite pub. I yelled at the group behind me for being annoying. They were extremely irritating, singing songs and cheering, but the manager decided to kick me out instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 335

You deserved it 1 500

GET ME THE MANAGER

By Anonymous - 12/06/2022 14:00

Today, after a very long and stressful day at school, I had to go to work right after. There's no better way to start my shift than getting screamed at by a Karen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 879

You deserved it 125

Hole in the head

By Anonymous - 27/10/2022 16:00

Today, I had to get a nail removed from my head after a nail gun incident. The nail was actually touching my brain but didn’t cause damage. Of course being a builder with typical builder mates, the joke now is that I’m so brainless even getting shot in the head doesn’t make a difference. FML

I agree, your life sucks 970

You deserved it 180

This is fine

By Anonymous - 30/06/2025 11:00 - Australia - Yarrambat

Today, I woke up hungover and with the lovely surprise of my monthly cycle. Now I’m at work, sitting with a blaring faulty fire alarm that I have no way to turn off. Everyone who can fix it is on holiday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 362

You deserved it 150

David Attenborough

By types - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided he was going to narrate everything I do. I can't get him to stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 500

You deserved it 3 744

Pray for me

By Anonymous - 20/11/2021 14:00

Today, my wife is visiting her nana, which I hate because she comes home full of Catholic guilt, meaning I'll have to spend the next few months wasting my Sunday mornings in church, until her guilt wears off and her normal Sunday morning laziness resumes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 975

You deserved it 299

Good intentions

By Anonymous - 16/08/2021 19:01 - Indonesia - Bekasi

Today, I asked someone to work with me because I felt sorry for her. Turns out, she isn't at all helpful and refuses to work after school, just because she would miss her "beauty nap". She also made up dumb excuses for why she couldn't help me or the others. I wonder why no one wanted to be in a group with her… FML

I agree, your life sucks 809

You deserved it 143

Sounds like quite the catch

By Brooke - 14/08/2015 16:50 - United States - San Francisco

Today, a cute guy approached me at a nightclub. I was really excited, until he drunkenly slurred, "Babe, I'd suck the farts from your asshole!" and then threw up everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 827

You deserved it 2 365

AMAZON!

By Anonymous - 18/01/2024 06:00 - Germany

Today, I went to the pickup location where the email from Amazon said my package was, but they didn't have it. Through order tracking, I then found out that it has been delivered to the wrong location, on the other side of town. This has happened twice in a row now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 511

You deserved it 94

Obsessed and possessed

By ugh just make it stop - 01/07/2023 18:00

Today, after weeks of my yelling, my boyfriend finally listened and got a hobby. Instead of getting into something sensible like martial arts, he chose tabletop gaming. Now I have to listen to hours of boring stories about pretend fantasy worlds, and admit to everyone that my boyfriend is a nerd. FML

I agree, your life sucks 142

You deserved it 2 004

Rules and regulations

By Anonymous - 29/03/2022 04:00

Today, I moved into a new home with a HOA, and on the first night I received a copy of the HOA rules as thick as a phone book. I already regret moving here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 796

You deserved it 452

Drama kings and queens unite!

By IGoOutWalking - 25/02/2023 18:00 - United States

Today, I was doing some routine maintenance on my car when a radiator connector broke unexpectedly. I realized I'd rather walk 3 miles in freezing temperatures than call my nearest friends for a ride and have to listen to their drama. FML

I agree, your life sucks 715

You deserved it 201

Wild

By harrassed - 10/09/2022 20:30 - Australia

Today, my housemate yelled at me because I'm "ignoring" her and it makes her feel "rejected and hated." Last week, she yelled at me for saying hello, and told me not to speak to her unless she spoke to me first, because she was "stressed out" and "can't be disturbed." I can't take her mood swings any more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 259

You deserved it 124

Holy smokes

By Anonymous - 24/07/2021 18:01

Today, I’m down to my last, partially snapped cigarette. I carefully taped it back together, enough for at least half a smoke. I then snapped it completely while opening the door to go outside and smoke it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 322

You deserved it 1 239

New Year's Eve

By Anonymous - 01/01/2022 20:01

Today, after explicitly telling everyone we know that we were having a date night to ourselves, my wife’s sister turned up at our house because she “heard you were all by yourselves without the kids so I thought I’d come over to keep you company.” Never a fucking moment to ourselves. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 838

You deserved it 202

Toxic positivity

By You're* a bunch of idiots - 20/03/2023 08:00 - United States

Today, my school's student council has started putting random positive messages on people's lockers. I'd like to be happy about it, but my inner Grammar Nazi is pissed because they've mixed up "your" and "you're" on so many of them. I just want to take a sharpie and correct them all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 783

You deserved it 178

Mismanagement

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my boss changed some company calendar settings on my computer to see what they'd be like. He didn't like it, so he told me to change it back, then left. I have no idea what he changed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 523

You deserved it 3 800

So frustrating!

By Anonymous - 29/11/2023 18:00

Today, I bought a massive new puzzle to take my mind off of things. Hours later, I realized there was a missing piece. Frustrated, I looked everywhere for it, only to discover it was stuck to the bottom of my shoe, and I'd been walking around with it all day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 457

You deserved it 146

Body positivity

By fat…? - 13/07/2022 04:00

Today, when people ask me what I’m doing this summer and I answer that I’m going into plus-size modeling, they rudely say, “Oh, me too,” or, “Oh, my grandma too.” I have an hourglass figure and spent hours on my portfolio, but everyone still thinks I’m just trying to feel better about being fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 866

You deserved it 386

My kingdom for some peace and quiet!

By Yudith - 08/08/2024 06:00 - Canada

Today, I can at last cool off the house by opening my windows after one week of heatwave. Unfortunately, some asshat working for the city decided to repair the street, or rather bang bang bang on the pavement, right in front of them. From 10 pm to 6 am. Every night. For a week. They won't stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 388

You deserved it 108

Nags

By Anonymous - 04/04/2021 02:01

Today, ever since the company I worked for closed because of COVID, it took me 6 months to find a new job, during which time my wife and in-laws nagged me to get one. Now I have, my wife has asked for a divorce and I absolutely hate my new job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 178

You deserved it 139

Doo doo doodoodoo doo doo

By fuck your music - 16/07/2019 07:30 - United States

Today, I finally got tired of my neighbors constantly blaring their obnoxious rap music all hours of the day and night. Trying to be funny, I put Baby Shark on a loop and turned my speakers all the way up. They called the cops on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 975

You deserved it 576

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The Top

Today, I spent my first day with my parents for the first time in a year as I've been away at university. My dad went to work, and my mum spent the whole day playing mahjong with her friends as they all told me "how fat I've gotten" and how "boys won't like it". FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 822

You deserved it 1 328

Today, I handed my resume in to a cafe that was hiring. I returned home and noticed a voicemail, it was one from the boss for a trial. I eagerly returned the call, showing my enthusiasm. Without thinking, I ended with "ok love you. *GASP* ah, BYE" and quickly hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 629

You deserved it 27 237

Today, a customer threatened to smash my face in because I wouldn't give him a veteran's discount on a donut. He looked like he'd eaten his way out of fat camp, and it seemed the only action he'd seen was fighting his way into a lard factory. Still, he swung fast, and I now have a black eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 499

You deserved it 17 993

Today, I was chatting with my mother. She was telling me about some new mouthwash she recently got, and the moment the word "gargle" escaped her lips, my husband muttered just a little too loudly from the kitchen, "How about gargling my balls instead, bitch." Our family is now at war. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 053

You deserved it 5 792

Today, I learned that my brother has been secretly married to his girlfriend for over a year. That means that during Christmas break, when I told him that she was a "toxic bitch" and that he should leave her before she drags him down with her, they had already been married for 6 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 399

You deserved it 482

Today, after I fell off of a 150-foot cliff, bruised like crazy with two skull fractures and two foot fractures, one of my closest friends brought his sick girlfriend to visit me while I’m pretty much immobile, and I tested positive for COVID. FML

I agree, your life sucks 622

You deserved it 117