By - 1/2/2020 18:00

Young kids

  Today, my daughter asked me what is the youngest age at which you should start having sex. Being a good mom, I said that she shouldn't have sex until after she's been married. My daughter then said, "Oh... shoot," and walked away. My daughter is twelve. FML
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By  Gradask  |  9

It is time to be a good mum and ask her what she thinks is sex, with abstinent only kids think sex is holding hand or hugging to long. So sit down and talk about condom and how they prevent STD and pregnancy, find good information online, there are youtube channels that gives you the facts about sex and how and when you should do it and also how to protect yours self.

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By  Gradask  |  9

It is time to be a good mum and ask her what she thinks is sex, with abstinent only kids think sex is holding hand or hugging to long. So sit down and talk about condom and how they prevent STD and pregnancy, find good information online, there are youtube channels that gives you the facts about sex and how and when you should do it and also how to protect yours self.

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I don't know if you really suffer from PTSD, but you do suffer from stupidity. Luckily, there is a cure. First, lower your head, so you're looking at the ground, and then run full speed into a wall.

By  bluejello2001  |  17

That is *not* how you have a proper, healthy discussion about sex with your child. Especially one who is going through puberty and possibly started menstruating (I can guarantee some of her friends have by now).
Attitudes like yours just lead to a lack of knowledge that results in STDs, unplanned teenage pregnancy, and shame about anything sexual. You are not helping your daughter at all.

By  Ashamed_Sister  |  60

I honestly don't know what I would tell a 12-year-old girl, but "after marriage" wouldn't be part of it and it wasn't smart to do so. Now she is going to disregard your advice because in her opinion that advice was complete nonsense.

By  kathryn13  |  16

My mother gave my sister and me the sex talk when we were 12-13. We were entering puberty and she was determined to give us the kind of talk she never received from her own mother. She encouraged us to to wait until we were ready and to be open with her if we started to have sex so she could make sure we started birth control and anything else. Telling your child to wait till marriage and not explaining sex to her in general not only makes her more unlikely to go to you if she needs you, but also makes her more vulnerable as well. Knowledge does not encourage sex, but it makes it safer when and if she does decide to do so.

By  bl3ur0z3  |  17

Is this the first time this topic has come up? If you've left her to learn from peers, you better believe you'll be the youngest Grandma on the block.

By  Stephanie Compton  |  5

I’d most likely say the same thing to mine when she is 12. But then again unlike these other commenters who are obviously ok with kids “hooking up” mine will be taught very strict like that sex is only between a husband and wife.

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  Suaria  |  37

Fact is it is unrealistic to expect some people to wait till marriage. I and probably many other people out there had sex in high school. Luckily I was educated on how to have safe sex. It's better to educate teens on safe sex just in case they have sex.

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  kathryn13  |  16

The reality of that is that your children will most likely not wait till marriage and unfortunately because you closed off conversation about it, they will hide it from you. Which not only is sad for your relationship but also leaves them vulnerable to pregnancy, STDs, and more. My parents didn’t tell me to wait for marriage but they did ask that I be careful and wait till I’m ready. I am an adult and still haven’t had sex yet so obviously they didn’t encourage me to “hook up”. And even if I did have sex, they gave me the knowledge to do so safely which is more important than shaming them.

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  stormy0307  |  16

Then you have already lost them. Being very strict with them means they will want to try it since it’s forbidden and they will then hide it. I grew up in Utah and most parents share your belief in how to teach kids about sex. Most all the good Mormon kids I knew who had very strict religious parents were hooking up and very wild in secret due to their parents being very authoritarian about sex only after marriage. Naturally since it was banned and not to be discussed in any way other than “sex outside of marriage is bad and sinful” they almost all desperately wanted it and most found ways to get it. Do yourself and your kids a favor and actually teach them about how sex works, how to have safe sex and to wait until they are ready. Yes impart in them that they should wait for marriage, but don’t make it an ultimatum, make it their choice to wait until marriage.