By Elle - 23/02/2011 21:07 - United States

Today, my therapist told me to write down my secrets in an envelope and symbolically burn them. My secrets included stories of my rampant sex life, drug use, a suicide attempt, and the overpowering hatred I have for my family. I've managed to misplace the envelope somewhere back home. FML
I agree, your life sucks 32 477
You deserved it 22 365

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You should have burned them right after you wrote them.

You had me at "rampant sex life"!


linopz224 0

that blows!

It also sucks

I can see why you have a therapist OP

sounds a lot like my life, minus the suicide attempt and add the random meeting of celebrities.

With her drug abuse and rampant sex life, the OP blows and probably good at it too.

hghiPigh 0

you deserve it for being an awful human being

Mikekenny 0

suicide looking better

alliewillie 22

I'm sorry to say OP but you sound like a crappy person. Perhaps your family should know that you apparently despise them and leave evidence of it lying around the house.

I just wonder if her therapist uses FML.

IphonFML 6

then what did u burn?

Oh, dude. You got nice abs. They're so square. This is the reaction you wanted, right?

No, I believe it's the gay reaction he didn't want.

Privations_fml 3

Oh my god... Chimpsndip: I first saw your pic without looking at your username, and I thought of a monkey. Now I know it wasn't just me.

Unwritten guy rule #149: Never compliment on another guy's abs. It makes you look gay (unless you're into that sort of stuff).

sarcasm anyone? chimpsndip, i laughed

Seabass732 0

yeah I thought it was funny too, because I got the joke...

I've never understood why guys take pictures of their abs only and use them as profile pictures. obviously his face is too horrid to be included in the photo! :-/

heathersmorin 0

usually when you have abs like that your compensating for 2 thing- a messed up face and something below the abs...

is that a proven fact?

I think after working on his abs to get them to look like that he might want to show them off u know. I have pix of my abs as dps sometimes I don't see how the whole compensating thing works spesh for girls, or as your logic would have it we are compensating because we don't have penises?

viper2426 0


it looks kinda like you glued a giant white chocolate bar to you your stomach. ahahaha! I don't get why other guys do that it just makes you seem like a douche. by the way, you can always find the douches of a school on the football team. so this is odd because this douche likes soccer. the only sport that you need skills to be in(: oh and je n'aime pas vous(:

22-Chimps aren't monkeys...

2 - nothing yet obviously

Thesinginguy where do you get off stereotyping people who play football? and more importantly, where do you get off saying soccer is the only sport that requires skill to play? to me, you sound like one of those disgruntled kids who got told they weren't the material the team needed by the coach during tryouts one year and decided to grind an ax over it since then. get over yourself. narrow-minded, simplistic, nonsensical fools like you infest this planet and make it a horrible place to be. use your head when you say something, your mind is being wasted otherwise.

#93 soccer sucks, basketball is awesome

vb68_fml 28

As is yours since you don't have a profile pic ...

if theyr your secrets and you were gonna burn them so nobody knows, why tell them to millions of people on here'll never know it is thanks to FML. 2.people need to vent,

No but she has told us she's called Elle from Virginia :L

autumnah 3

I'm pretty sure there is gonna be more than one elle...

because this is anonymous.

You should have burned them right after you wrote them.

34 is that really your pic? You are gorgeous and you sound like a cool person.

geminiwings87 0

Hey Petey, you shouldn't be hitting on other guys when your bio says, "spending time with my amazing other half". just saying, I'm gay to and I would hate to know my boyfriend did that. I agree though, he is gorgeous :)

Did your family read it?

meowmeowwkitty 0

that's what we are assuming.... hence, FML

Mewzakuro240 0

32- You really are a bitch. Stop trying to make others feel bad why don't you. I've read three FML's with your jackass-y comments. Reel it in, please.

that's not what I assumed. I figured she just lost them. dint you think that if her family had read them she would have said so. it's a pretty important part of the story

Mewzakuro240 0

It greatly saddens me that my comment was moderated. I don't really remember what if said, I think it was something about how she's making people feel bad through the course of many FML's. But it's not important anymore. Oh well, thanks mod's, for keeping the comments Quasi-friendly :)

How the fuck is she supposed to know?


Thanks tips..

agirlnamedhope 0


coatie 0

Your parents have them.

Mewzakuro240 0

Can I say that the wheel on your chair is actually kinda cook looking? Well, I did. So... hi!!

Mewzakuro240 0

*cool -stupid iPhone correct.

krazy_glu3 0

those are the badass wheelchairs!!! :D

RedPillSucks 31

Looks like a performance (sports) chair, but not for racing. Looks too heavy.

mtbracing 3

a suicide attempt? those ppl are always begging for attention

your so retarded, I kinda want to burn your dog.

I_R_Genius 3

I kind of want to burn you for your bad grammar.

iseywisey 0

18- get a liife if people have bad grammar that's their problem. go and become a teacher or an editor if that's what you're interested in.

I_R_Genius 3

#52, I do have a life, but thank you very much. Maybe you should get one and stay off the internet?