By Welpthatwasfast - 10/06/2016 07:57

Spicy
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to mix it up and find a good place outdoors to have fun. After an hour of climbing up a rocky mountainside to a completely isolated clearing, out of the way of any hiking path, he was still so paranoid that he finished within 20 seconds. FML
I agree, your life sucks 15 377
You deserved it 2 124

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Then a nearby game of hide and seek breaks out, adding to the confusion when the seeker shouts, "ready or not, here I come!"

That sounds like a rocky start to a good time

Comments

That sounds like a rocky start to a good time

More like a rocky start to an underwhelming time. :-/

cootiequeen4444 11

whoosh. while it's not kosher to explain jokes I will explain anyways.. for educational purposes. nah just kidding. I'm not that pompous. I just know I like things explained to me when I'm confused or mistaken so why not? it was a pun joke thing. a rocky start like a shaky aka not very good start to a good time. thus a rocky start to an underwhelming time wouldn't even make sense using the same context (saying ? idiom? idk.)

AirBusDriver 23

Come again?

cootiequeen4444 11

this is a sorely underrated comment.

Then a nearby game of hide and seek breaks out, adding to the confusion when the seeker shouts, "ready or not, here I come!"

I give an absolute fuck about your FML profile :)

I mean I'm not gay but the comments you make almost make me become gay. And that's why I'll give you a fuck

A bumpy start and a quick finish. Never good for outdoor fun

Sounds like a pathetic excuse for a premature ejaculator... Not that I would know anything at all about premature ejaculation. I promise...

Dodge4x4Ram 46

I did that in the mountains of Alaska & we got caught by dogs from a hiker. good times.

Taco The Dank 27

How cold was it up there?

An isolated clearing is still technically out in the open, so I think I can understand why he still felt exposed. Don't be too tough on him and hopefully you'll both be able to give it another shot someday soon.

I'd be paranoid too. Bears? Snakes? Mountain lions?

Should have made him go down on you after. While sex outdoors is awesome, there is nothing quite like a little oral with a view

Asked! Not made. Important difference

That's shitty, fyl