By Welpthatwasfast - 10/06/2016 07:57

Spicy
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to mix it up and find a good place outdoors to have fun. After an hour of climbing up a rocky mountainside to a completely isolated clearing, out of the way of any hiking path, he was still so paranoid that he finished within 20 seconds. FML
I agree, your life sucks 15 377
You deserved it 2 124
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Tripartita 44
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Then a nearby game of hide and seek breaks out, adding to the confusion when the seeker shouts, "ready or not, here I come!"

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Weymere 11
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That sounds like a rocky start to a good time

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Weymere 11
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That sounds like a rocky start to a good time

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sherri_baby88 36
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More like a rocky start to an underwhelming time. :-/

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cootiequeen4444 11

whoosh. while it's not kosher to explain jokes I will explain anyways.. for educational purposes. nah just kidding. I'm not that pompous. I just know I like things explained to me when I'm confused or mistaken so why not? it was a pun joke thing. a rocky start like a shaky aka not very good start to a good time. thus a rocky start to an underwhelming time wouldn't even make sense using the same context (saying ? idiom? idk.)

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AirBusDriver 23

Come again?

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cootiequeen4444 11

this is a sorely underrated comment.

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Tripartita 44
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Then a nearby game of hide and seek breaks out, adding to the confusion when the seeker shouts, "ready or not, here I come!"

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cuz803 44
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I give an absolute fuck about your FML profile :)

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rhyspiecesno8 18
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I mean I'm not gay but the comments you make almost make me become gay. And that's why I'll give you a fuck

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toolazytotype99 18
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A bumpy start and a quick finish. Never good for outdoor fun

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crudeandrudeguy 29
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Sounds like a pathetic excuse for a premature ejaculator... Not that I would know anything at all about premature ejaculation. I promise...

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Dodge4x4Ram 46

I did that in the mountains of Alaska & we got caught by dogs from a hiker. good times.

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Taco The Dank 27

How cold was it up there?

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TheLadyOpal 30
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An isolated clearing is still technically out in the open, so I think I can understand why he still felt exposed. Don't be too tough on him and hopefully you'll both be able to give it another shot someday soon.

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okaydisarray 17
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I'd be paranoid too. Bears? Snakes? Mountain lions?

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Lalala579121 27
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And worst of all, boy scouts.

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barlos88 19
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Should have made him go down on you after. While sex outdoors is awesome, there is nothing quite like a little oral with a view

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EmperorChowilio 21
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Asked! Not made. Important difference

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Odin1624 12
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That's shitty, fyl

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