By Anonymous - 31/05/2012 20:53 - Canada - Courtenay

Spicy
Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML
I agree, your life sucks 21 578
You deserved it 44 389

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Top comments

At least you used protection.

If you are afraid of your girlfriends parents finding out your are having sex maybe you shouldn't do it in their house.

Comments

Yeah now thats a sticky situation

I was just in one of those situations! .... Fun, right? ;)

omg.... ur screwed bro.

I woulda been like, "Uh.... I always keep one on...?" then ran out the front door. Then again, my most recent ex's step dad scared the living shit out of me and it woulda been running for my life

Hahaha thank you OP thank you I really needed that laugh

I've seen this FML before....

Everybody come check this FML. It's kind of recent. Today, on Facebook, my sister posted a ton of photos of herself wearing a skimpy bikini, commenting that she looked hideous and fat. I can't stand attention-seeking fuckballs, so I called her on it. My mother then condemned me for "mocking" my sister, and grounded me for an entire month. FML In the commenting of the first comment there is funny shit xD. Just read the last commented that was commented under the #1 comment. Ok :p

Shoulda just told him, "it's better than millions of babies dying on her face!"

Let's hope her father is afraid to go back to prison.

Quick! Tell him you are the Trojan man!

How did the condom even slip? Was it that loose around your Willie?

Well considering the size difference between hard and soft, you would think if he lost his boner at the sight of her dad it would slide precariously until finally falling to its impending doom.

I suppose that would have meant something entirely different if he still had a boner at the sight of her dad and the condom didn't come off. Round two, anyone?

Obviously he put it on when he was hard. however, after rushing to get dressed I'm sure he went soft causing the condom to slip down.

Wouldn't having underwear on solve this whole problem?

At least you used protection.

Exactly, could of been worse. Could have been braking the pregnancy to her dad...

Either way I hope OP has a bullet proof vest on.

see if i was the dad id give him a high 5 and leave the room

I was going to say it

108- You're profile picture. I'm speechless on what to say next other then BAM!

108- You're profile picture. I'm speechless on what to say next other then BAM!

True but now he might need protection from the dad. Just wondering but how does someone forget to take off the condom though?

72 that chicken looks delicious!!

136- Hungry? Why wait? Eat the packaging.

If a father congratulates a guy on scoring his daughter, there's a problem.

Yeah I would not be congratulating this guy on banging my daughter. It would be more like you better start running while I load my gun.

44, if you're going to correct someone don't omit other errors like "could of".

If you are afraid of your girlfriends parents finding out your are having sex maybe you shouldn't do it in their house.

What are you talking about? OP was obviously fapping naked in his girlfriends bathroom.

Use a condom for that, never heard of that

A lot of parents would know their kids have sex, it's just a tad awkward when they catch them in the act.

hahaha ur number 69 lol xD

That's the thrill of it though! Do it on their bed!

Even better I've done it with my gf and her sister on the pool table

110 .....what the fuck.....

110 what the hell i doubt that happened

I find it absolutely disgusting that people do it in their parents bed. Why the hell would you want to have sex where your parents sleep and also have sex. So gross.

Didn't say they were having sex in the parents bed.

205- read 77's reply.

Doin' it tomorrow.

thats going to be hard to talk your way out of OP.

Op: *kicks condom under table* "...so what's for dinner?" Gf dad: "Well I think I'll just have spaghetti and your-balls with vodka sauce"

Wonder what happened next..

Doesn't matter had sex?

Dude its just protection

Doesn't matter, had the crap beat out of him by GF father.

Toilets a good thing. Could've gone there before entering the kitchen :)

Unless the kitchen is on the way to the bathrooms, some houses are designed like that.

Depends on where in the house they had sex (;

Condoms do not go in toilets.. Why do guys think and do this??

They meant by going there to throw it away or something smart one.

134- "Toilets a good thing".... I do believe you are wrong, smart one.

144 - Some people refer to the bathroom as "the toilet." Since he said "could've gone there," it is safe to assume that he meant the bathroom as a whole.

Shit idk how to delete a comment and I misread the comment I was replying to. Nothing to see here... Move on...

So all I did was edit it. I forgot to add that and now this is a double post.

And you call yourself the FML Master...

You must be a master of fucking up toilets. |the kid|

If you guys are wondering why I didn't just edit it, I already did and you can't more than once. (at least on my iPod you can't)

Fucks sake I did it again... Someone please tell me how to delete a comment on an iPod.

Actually: if you are a fan of ice breakers, you could use an empty ice breaker container to store the used condom. That way when you throw it away no one will see said condom

"Psht, how'd that get there?"

"I wear a rubber at all times; it's a necessity."

"Snaaaake skiiin!!!"

"It's just balloon for balloon animals."

-picks it up- "uhhh... I think you dropped this.."

What's that white stuff doing in there?

zachherbert, if I were the dad, I'd demand he blow it up.

HAHA! This is hilarious!

Dad: Hey Dan! How's you and my daughter's relationship going? OP: *tightening belt* Ummm...great! Our conversations are definitely getting more intimat--I MEAN DEEP--DAMMIT! No, I mean personal. Yeah, personal. Dad: That's good. *leans in* Just remember: if you so much as look at my daughter in a sexual way, you will wish you were never with her. EVER. OP: Yes sir! Uh, gotta go. Moms callin-- *condom drops onto floor* *pisses pants*

We got what happened for the OP, no need to spell it out for us, thanks.

user324234324 1

Stop trying so damn hard.

16,22- both of you shut up! I love a good story and you're ruining it!!!

While you two were busy pissing and moaning about my comment I looked at it, and established that it is probably one of my worst comments. Wanna know what I did after that? I had dinner and watched some TV, them came back to look at the rest of the comments. My comment was bad. I don't need two assholes getting hot and bothered about it to realize that. I apologize if it I inconvinienced you by forcing you to read it, but if you didn't like it, there is a certain button that helps you with that problem.

You pretty much always have bad comments. This one is like the rest of them...annoyingly too thought out...

Actually, I found his comment more intriguing than the actual FML, so if you would kindly refrain from speaking such harsh words, it would be much appreciated. Now a shortened version for the incompetent people online. Dude, shut the fuck up. Thank you.

34 - Are you KIDDING me? Half (if not more) of your comments on this website are bashing other people for having "bad" comments or being "stupid". "there is a certain button that helps you with that problem" Don't mind if I do.

Wtf are we having Story time on fml lmao?^^^^

reddudeover: And your comments are joy from heaven above, right? I don't think so. If half (if not more) of mine are bashing people, then half of yours are buried. The people that I 'bash' fall under this category : -'That sucks OP.' -'Wow' -'Your an idiot.' -Blatant ignorance about an issue. -Trolls that make idiotic comments solely to piss people off. -Anyone that falls in between. Unfortunately, people like this are abundant on this site, which is why it seems like I'm always attacking somebody. But I do not just attack people for no reason. In fact, the other 'half' of my comments are cracking jokes and having fun with other commenters. So yes, I do have faults, but nobody is perfect. You can go ahead and dislike me, but you'll have to get that I don't care what someone I've never met thinks of me. I hope I haven't hindered your FML experience in any way. Please accept my deepest apologies.

I didn't think it was that bad! But really who I'm I?? ^_^

Can everyone just stop and realize you're having an Internet argument on FML... Just stop.

Well damn... I thought it was funny y'all.

this thread is the equivalent to a bunch of naked guys in a room bragging about who fills a 3 inch condom more.

123 - You keep saying you don't care but, you take the time to write these long winded comments. :

147 - I'm glad at least you realized this. People, y'all need to stop taking things so seriously. His comments suck because they're always so overdone. I can have my opinions like you. It's as if FML is your life and you judge your self worth on how many thumbs up you have...like someone else already said..he tries too hard, hence why his comment is buried, mines buried because people are too sensitive.

53- You completed my fucking day

Please stop posting

Holy fuck, who cares about comments?

Dafuq did I just read.

And now we all drop it and move along

I too bash the "aww so sorry op things will get better soon don't worry :)" people.

Just tell them your extra cautious....Do you know how many diseases your boxers carry.:)

Here i'll help you out. You're stupid. Your english teacher is ashamed of you. That's correct usage if the words, learn something new everyday!

I think 97 was correcting the first "your" in the comment. Unless your just getting mad at him for being a grammar nazi

Ya but they corrected wrong. "you're" doesn't make sense. That would be like saying "you are" which doesn't fit. So original commenter was right.

You guys are dumb. There are two 'your's in the comment. The first one is wrong, the second one is right. Goodness, do you guys learn anything? If I get buried, that would mean no.

119 - of* . Sorry, that was bothering me.

No his correction was correct. It was for the 1st "your"

First "your" should be you're. Second "your" is corrected. Almost all of you on this are wrong!

Your is possessive duh!

Hmmm... I wonder how that ended up?

well you would know if ya red it the first time

Actually, 140, it doesn't say how it ended And by the way, you spell it 'read'.. Jus' saying