By Username - 19/06/2011 18:08 - United States

Spicy
Today, I went camping with my girlfriend and best friend. They are now having blood-curdling sex in our tent. My friend is also my ride home. FML
I agree, your life sucks 60 799
You deserved it 7 380

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MAN THE FUCK UP AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. ( anger ended ) throw her shit in the fire and then when your friend drives you home pop him in the face when you reach your house.

Blood curdling sex? Sounds terrible.

Comments

grow a pair and do something . like kill them and blame it on a wild rabid pack of deer

or or or (and I'm just being optimistic here) you can put that hoe in her place, beat the shot out of your 'best friend' and steal his car keys. THEN you can blame it on a wild pack of deers.

I would try and make it awkward for them by saying stuff "what'd you guys do last night?" and other stuff like that. haha(;

Howdy guys. When responding to the first comment please mention what the first comment said. Thank you. Love Always, Epilepsy

22 you don't know boo? It's what the little girl calls the blue guy from monster Inc. Also I can't wait to OP's next FML. "Today, on the car ride home, my friend told me the blood curdling sex he had with my girlfriend. She was in the car with us and agreed. FML"

and you did nothing about it. i woulda stormed in there

"they're having blood curdling sex in OUR tent"? so are they having sex right next to you? sorry but if a dude was fucking my gf i would chop his dick off with a rusty knife.

Did you punch him in the faaace?

Some best friend:P sucks! fyl

k so..52, which comment did you respond to?

oh, tents :) just set it on fire, you can think of billion excuses after that, like wind blew some sparkles from fireplace in it, cuz u all were too drunk and dumb and build it closer than it had to be, if alcohol was involved, it's even better :)

Like Abuela Grande always say, you got to forgive and forget and you will be enlighted! You will meet Jesus halfway littel one!

you need to reavaluate the type of people you allow into your life

you guys are so dumb. what was the point of thumbing down my comment? it was a good suggestion for OP. people on FML have no sense of humor whatsoever.

Gonna be one awkward drive home lol

52 unless you actually have Epilepsy that is very rude and offensive for you to have that as your name, for I actually HAVE Epilepsy. How would you or anyone else react if my name was Cancer?

139, great call. Too bad it tends to fall on deaf ears.

Okay eager. 1. I couldn't give less of a fuck. I give 0 fucks. 2. You are a pussy for getting offended. 3. Wow you are a pussy and no even if I had cancer I would not be offended. 4. Wow you are still reaaallly gay. 5. I do not have epilepsy but my friend who made this account does. So please shut the fuck upZ.

Where else would you like me to respond if it wasn't under #1? it's hard to talk to you guys when I respond to you under #83. Things might get a little confusing.

how bout cut his dick off with a dull knife!

when they are done she will say that was intense and the guy would say yeah we are!

agreed. if you can't beat em, join em.

agreed. if you can't beat em, join em.

agreed. if you can't beat em, join em.

agreed. if you can't beat em, join em.

Haha. You guys are just starting to thumb down my comments just out of spite. Haha. Really if you are talking about the Fml respond to the Fml. If you're talking to comments respond to comments. It's logical thought. I know it's hard for you guys to comprehend.

^sorry for posting four times.

He forgot about the golden rule. ITS OK WHEN IT'S IIIN A 3 WAY. ITS NOT GAY WHEN IT'S IN A 3 WAY. WITH A HONEY IN THE MIDDLE THERE'S SOME LEE WAY. when in doubt, ask the lonely island.

I hope what OP meant to say was "my enemy and my ex-girlfriend were having blood curdling sex."

I hope OP didn't just watch them

SHUT THE FUCK UP EPILEPSY. NO ONE GIVES A SHIT. Jesus.

Hey deafening. Go suck your boyfriends prepubescent dick and watch your language you little Cunt bitch. You're fucking fourteen. Jesus. You really think I give a flying fuck. I'm gonna talk shit to all you little anime watching fat bitches and all of the geeky ass virgin guys on this website. Mainly cause i think it's hilarious watching you guys team up against me. Youre all pathetic. And now I wait for this to get deleted.

girls be crazy :)

what bout the drive home

^^ do what 107 says don't be a limp dick grow a pair and sort that cunt out

226- what part of Texas are you from?

I would do this 1st get car keys second almost all tents have 2 zippers, 1 on inside and 1 on out, zip up the outter 1 and lock it somehow then set it on fire and make it look like the campfire did it wait until they stop trying to get out then unlock it drive off for "help" get the cops and tell them exactly what happened, that you where off getting more fire wood and when you came back it was on fire and there was nothing you could do to save them! mwahahaha sometime I scare myself I'm so good!!!

208, coment fits picture so well lol

u guys realize your talking about murder right? if op is to pussy to get in there and do something then he isn't going to kill anyone. come on now be real

one word: Word.

but the keys.....

Aperture Science Automobile Unlocking devices are built to function at temperatures up to 1000 Kelvins.

it's not an fml op. it's your problem for not doing anything about it! grow a pair and beat the shit outta your friend. and steal his keys and leave.

that's sick steal the key cars and phones, go and fuck them both then go out and fuck her best friend !

yeah join em it's not gay if it's in a three way !

it sounds better the fourth time.

Agreed. It is not worth the OP to put his entire life on the line for being charged for murder (and who knows how many years in jail) for people who are not worth it.

I agree join them

ydi that's what u get for bringing ur male friend along

join in on the fun

107 I love sparkly fires!

Something that I've always wondered about: Whenever someone says that their girlfriend/wife is cheating on them, why does everyone always say to go after the male whom she is cheating with? Why don't they ever say "Kill both the male AND your girlfriend"? Think about it: a. It takes two to tango (and by tango, I mean sex. And by sex I mean copulation.) b. The girlfriend is the one who is more at fault. The girlfriend is the one who took an unsaid oath of loyalty, not the cheating male. Anyhow, I say hurt both the male and the girlfriend. Furthermore, whenever the fml is "Today my girlfriend cheated on me with a woman", they NEVER say "Kick both of them in the vagina". No, it's always, "Aww poor you." with no threat of violence towards either female. Sorry, guess I'm a bit of a feminist. You know, equality of genders and whatnot.

I've always wondered that myself. And in this fault I can see hurting both parties, but if your gf goes out and starts doing anything that can constitute as cheating with some random strange guy, why does the guy end up hit? He didn't know she dating anyone, how is he at fault? The gf is at fault!

The lonely island :)

Wack ur bestfriend..

if ya can't beat em, eat em.

"These nice deer told my ex girlfriend off, best up my old best friend, then took his keys and gave me a ride home" perfect way to explain it to the cops.

Blood curdling sex? Sounds terrible.

I think should get the camera, go in there and film, use as evidence for rape, bribe the psychologist to say she's lying about her being raped. There's good revenge.

Yeah op that's what I was thinking.. not sure if he/she meant that as a good thing or not but that sounds like a bad time

is OP's best friend a dog?

Well, OP knows how to choose great best friend. Or girlfriend. Awesome.

My only question is, why are they both still alive?

Think the OP should get in there before his tent gets all bloody.

I think he meant "blood curling screaming sex"

hey OP for revenge you should go and find ur girlfriends best friend and have sex with her. see how she likes it.

And in other news, Battlefield 3 looks pretty fucking awesome.

174 best comment IF he he gets caught it's a crime of passion... lol but they are camping so there's less of a chance of them being found ;)

nothing says "what do you think you're doing" like 2 horrible camping "accidents"

yeah it does in my opinion it looks a lot more realistic than MW3.

fuck yeah battlefield 3 does look bad ass. this guy is a big pussy. he probably wasn't fucking his gf good enough that's y she is with his friend. u need to fuck them right to keep them around!

maybe its so hot of sex its blood curtling?? Im confused by that comment

#174 yes i agree lol

#2 - I was thinking the same thing... "who wants blood-curdling sex anyways, sounds painful"

ex girlfriend? and ex friend?

that sucks! should've been better in the sack

While they're busy having sex, take his keys and leave them (after you beat him up 1st)

just set the tent on fire and say your campfire got out of control

314- you went to school with my cousins & one of my friends! :D they graduated last year though.

MAN THE FUCK UP AND DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. ( anger ended ) throw her shit in the fire and then when your friend drives you home pop him in the face when you reach your house.

well put my dude.... to do anything less would make you a soft ass punk

no shit he stole your woman beat the fuck outta him and steal his car fuck that punk bitch up!

Noo take do that then take his keys and drive yourself home :)

He "stole" the OP's woman? Unless his "best friend" is raping her, she shoulders just as much blame as the friend does.

Light the mother fuckin tent in fire and run it over with his car.

great idea. however, I believe some revenge is in order. pack all your stuff up and leave in your friends car. but before you do, find all the clothes and stuff of theirs that you can, smear food all over it, and throw it in the woods! also, don't forget to get a picture or recording or some sort of proof that she was cheating so you can show it to her parents and friends when they ask why you dumped her!

"OP: so you like my shit, eh? "friend": huh? OP: yeah, I know how you liked the shit of an ex-gf I have. would you like some more of my shit? *take a dump in his car*. "

Imagine the kids in #5's picture saying the first part of his comment! :D

I totally agree with you

40- he STOLE her as in, was a complete dick in regard to their friendship and fucked her with the knowledge that they were together, yes she's a skanky ho but his buddy still stole his girl and therefore requires the ass beating of the century

let them sleep, then just grab all clothes/car keys/cellphones, and leave. abandon car along with keys at nearest bus station. get new best friend / girlfriend. let them have all the fun in the world!

I believe there is no need to beat the shit out of anyone because his best friend just proved to him she didn't want him and his girlfriend fucking the guy was also her choice I would walk away and never talk to either of them I would tell them they can go fuck themselves now if your married that's a whole different story.

ur awesome, although I would rake out the friend and take their bodies in the trunk that way there are no witnesses. once home I would dump their bodies in the river. I would return to the campsite clean everything up. destroy the car and say he never picked you up.

^You are now on the FBI's watchlist

I agree burn the bitches shit and when you get home knock him the fuck out

thank god some people on this site have testicles!

I would take a video (for evidence), then take your "friends" keys and burn all their clothes then drive away. When you get back to town, show your ex-GF's parents the video so she has even MORE punishment when she gets home.

I would take his keys, their clothes, and perhaps a cell phone video of the sex occurring (preferably a shot of their faces), and then leave. I'd then drive home, park the car in his driveway (keys inside), and post the video on every social networking website. That slutbag, as well as the so called "friend" deserve it.

you should be glad you didn't join in.

time to find a new girlfriend and best-friend

true true. their bogus for that.

yeah. I can't imagine how awkward that mustve been...

Get in there, kick their asses, get the keys and drive, drive on!

Holy shit, Deja vu?

nvm haha, I had both above comments repeat themselves at one point... well, I'm a retard

as the saying goes, if you can't join 'em, beat 'em. or something like that. i personally don't think op is worthy of being called a male. he should probably get a sex change. |the kid|

And you're letting them get away with it?? Grow a pair and do something. Take the keys and leave them there. Serves them right.

Then they could have all the sex they want.

And have fun getting home

I actually agree with her, but burn all their clothes first >:D

Yes, that is a good idea. Definitely something I would do >:D lol