Animals: Today, I was working with some shelter puppies transporting them...

By sandra - 20/09/2010 06:13 - United States

Today, I was working with some shelter puppies transporting them to the vet's. I got all of the puppies in but one, and when I went to pull him out, I realized he had gotten car sick. Before I could stop it happening, he wagged his vomit-covered tail and hit me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 722

You deserved it 3 113

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 26/02/2017 19:00 - United States - Shreveport

Today, while at work for a dog groomer, I picked up a new puppy that came in for a groom. I held it up at face level with me, baby talking it, when it promptly began peeing. Luckily, it didn't get on my clothes. Unluckily, it got onto my face and into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 743

You deserved it 2 016

By Annie - 22/11/2009 22:07 - Mexico

Today, I noticed that my dog was feeling sad. I let him hop on my bed with me to make him feel better. It worked, right after he vomited all over my face and pillow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 664

You deserved it 6 010

By killjoyx - 23/07/2015 18:28 - United States - Suffolk

Today, when I woke up, my dog excitedly came up to me and licked my face. A few minutes later, I find out he had thrown up twice before he licked my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 800

You deserved it 3 183

By Dogmom - 18/12/2018 17:30

Today, I couldn’t tell that my puppy had an upset stomach before I left for work. I came home to her covered in shit inside her crate. After cleaning her up and almost being done with the mess, my husband found where she had tried to lick herself clean and then vomited it up in our bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 251

You deserved it 277

By SHIT-BREATH - 05/06/2013 16:03 - United Kingdom - Chepstow

Today, my puppy came into my room, and I cupped his head in my hands and bent down to kiss him. As I did, I realized that the part of his head I was kissing was covered in his own shit that he'd seemingly been rolling in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 490

You deserved it 15 108

By Puppysit88 - 16/04/2009 21:36 - United States

Today, I was petsitting for my neighbor's new puppy. A huge thunderstorm came, and the puppy started whining and shivering violently. I pulled it into my lap to try and comfort it. One loud clap of thunder later, and the puppy had explosive diarrhea all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 834

You deserved it 9 065

By Anonymous - 18/09/2015 21:14 - United States - Jonesboro

Today, at the small daycare I run, I turned around to put something away. I heard a splashing sound and then saw one of my kids vomiting. He puked several times, and managed to hit the only rug in the entire house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 493

You deserved it 1 983

By WolfieJL - 18/05/2014 07:51 - United States

Today, my two year old puked in the backseat of the car. When we stopped to clean her up, she scooped up the vomit by the handful and threw it at my head. I had an almost two hour drive before I could wash the smell off myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 041

You deserved it 5 454

By StinkyDogs - 27/03/2011 10:06 - United States

Today, on the way home from the dog groomer, my great Dane had a bout of diarrhea in the car. I slammed on the brakes and my other freshly shampooed dog slid off the seat and into the pile of crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 686

You deserved it 11 246

By mew - 25/10/2011 18:04 - Canada

Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 167

You deserved it 3 235

iltby 3

Monday 20 September 2010 12:36

That's rescue work for you. Good on you anyway.

dickster 0

Monday 20 September 2010 12:28

At least he was cute?

Comments

iltby 3

Monday 20 September 2010 12:36

That's rescue work for you. Good on you anyway.

FYLDeep 25

Monday 20 September 2010 12:37

IN DA FACE! HEADSHOT! POW! RIGHT IN THE KISSER!

ilovenerds_ 1

Monday 20 September 2010 13:05

Agreed.

craphappened 4

Monday 20 September 2010 12:46

I shall call him squishy and he shall be mine. Lol the pup sounds incredibly adorable. :)

WhyTheFace4 0

Monday 20 September 2010 15:59

It's so fluffy, I could die.

jackygirl2 0

Monday 20 September 2010 12:54

fyl. that is nasty. benefits of working at a shelter.

thegoodlife101 0

Monday 20 September 2010 12:56

time to call up the chineze restaurant, theyll take care of him

wDeemish 0

Monday 20 September 2010 12:59

EWw

2crazy2care 0

Monday 20 September 2010 13:09

aww poor puppy, lol

tiffyc011 0

Monday 20 September 2010 13:09

that sucks but if he's cute than it's a little better

hcovballer247 0

Monday 20 September 2010 13:16

Lol, delicious wasn't it : Þ

oldwidow69 0

Monday 20 September 2010 13:18

sux but how did vomit get on his tail???

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Today, I told my husband to stop his friendship with our neighbor’s 17 year-old daughter. They claim they just play video games together, but lately he’s been uninterested in sex and barely shows me any affection. He vehemently said, “It’s not like we’re fucking or anything! Chill!” and stormed out of the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 708

You deserved it 137

Today, I set aside a weekend to spend time with a friend. I learned that someone else is staying there: a fat, unemployed man-child who talks shit about us on Facebook, while his manipulative wife pays his bills. He got evicted from his last home when he pretended to be a ninja and cut up his neighbor's garden. FML

I agree, your life sucks 347

You deserved it 73

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...and the crowd goes wild!!!

I agree, your life sucks 186

You deserved it 230

Today, I got a very accusatory phone call from my daughter's teacher. According to my daughter, I absolutely refuse to let her eat in the morning. In reality, I told her it’s her responsibility to get herself up and get breakfast on her own before we leave. My daughter is 17 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 339

You deserved it 219

Today, I once again had another guy's sweaty crotch pushed into my face. I still don't see why I enjoy wrestling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 929

You deserved it 35 378

Today, a lady told me her husband had sinus surgery. I replied, "Oh, I know someone who just had that done." I then realized I meant Alexis on The Real Housewives of the OC. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 157

You deserved it 28 359

Today, I was walking down the street when I passed a construction site. All of the workers started making a fuss and whistling, etc. Naturally, I got very flustered. I stood still for a second and faced them. One yelled for me to move because I was in the way of a girl at a stop light. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 995

You deserved it 14 239

Today, I received multiple phone calls asking how much my Siamese cat cost. Too bad I never had a Siamese cat - let alone a Siamese cat up for sale. Turns out the guy I prank phone called the other day didn't appreciate it and put my number on Craigslist with an add for a Siamese cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 253

You deserved it 59 180

Same thing different taste

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