Today, I was waiting for the train. It arrived, I got on and...

By Kate - 23/4/2009 14:09 - United States

Today, I was waiting for the train. It arrived, I got on and the woman behind me stepped on the back of my shoe. My shoe came flying off and landed in the gutter between the train and the platform. The doors closed, the train pulled away. FML

I agree, your life sucks

57679

You deserved it

3190

Favorite

Transportation

Understandable

Basic Instinct

The cheek of some people

By Anonymous - 30/7/2019 12:07 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, a customer asked me if I was English, because I was struggling to understand what he saying. I said yes. He then called me a liar, and said I must be "one of them Polish immigrants." Oh, and he also had a thick Scottish accent. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1491

You deserved it

130

Favorite

By Anonymous - 21/6/2016 01:59 - United States - Fulton

Today, I might have ruined my co-worker's relationship with her fiancé, with whom I share a name, because we "work together too often" and now he doesn't know who's she's saying during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks

13995

You deserved it

1072

Favorite

By Anonymous - 8/5/2019 23:00

Today, my husband argued that it's not cheating if he's using his brother's Facebook account to talk to other women, because they think it's him. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1994

You deserved it

138

Favorite

By Dopamin3 - 20/3/2019 12:00

Today, driving to a conference 2 hours away a giant piece of ice fell off a truck and did severe damage to my car hood and busted the front light. The car was a few months old with around 5000 miles on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2141

You deserved it

137

Favorite

By Anonymous - 24/10/2019 00:01

A Different Kind of Tension

Today, I got a text from a guy I hooked up with once before my current boyfriend. The guy told me he has chlamydia, and I should probably get tested. I had to call my boyfriend to explain what happened and tell him to get tested. I'm meeting his family this weekend at his sister's wedding. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1435

You deserved it

470

Favorite

By Anonymous - 16/10/2013 17:37 - United States - Romulus

Today, I found out my handwriting is so bad that people think I write in Arabic. FML

I agree, your life sucks

46299

You deserved it

10363

Favorite

By Anonymous - 5/5/2015 19:54 - United States - Exton

Today, marks the fourth day in a row that I've worn the same outfit to prove to my parents that they pay me no attention. They still haven't noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks

32829

You deserved it

3603

Favorite

By SexyPlayer9 - 24/7/2009 05:23 - United States

Today, I was on a flight and one of my friends was sitting next to this woman who happened to be sleeping with her mouth wide open. My friend decided to take a picture. While I was editing it, a man sitting behind us said "If you want to take a picture of my girlfriend, wait until she's awake". FML

I agree, your life sucks

8472

You deserved it

65988

Favorite

By good_gravy - 20/2/2012 19:39 - United States

Today, my dog threw up on my bed while I was sleeping. I lost an hour of the day washing the vomit out with a rag, and my garbage disposal jammed on whatever otherworldly things my dog ate the day before. I had to dig it out by hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks

24121

You deserved it

3611

Favorite

By Anonymous - 15/5/2012 10:49 - Egypt

Today, after winning a major photography competition with the prize of an expensive workshop with a top photographer, I learned that my crazy stalker has paid the £250 workshop costs, and will travel 5 hours just to be there with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25193

You deserved it

2019

Favorite

By smellyhand - 16/12/2009 21:11 - United States

Today, it looked like rain so I held out my hand to catch a raindrop. When I finally caught one, I closed my hand over it and ran to show my friends to prove it was raining. I opened my hand saying, "Look! It's raining!" When I looked down, I saw that I had actually caught a bird shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks

12746

You deserved it

33917

Favorite

By mayhemily - 21/9/2015 16:22 - Canada - Aurora

Today, I passed out in my kitchen and was woken up by my dog. Not because she was worried about me, but because my body was blocking her food dish. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22386

You deserved it

2914

Favorite

By bunyipp - 23/9/2017 04:00 - Australia - Macquarie Park

Today, I was at work and a lady came in with a cake - I work as a nurse in a pediatrics ward. While we were eating the cake, she told us she used her breast milk instead of normal milk. Now all of us nurses have to be tested. FML

I agree, your life sucks

5393

You deserved it

428

Favorite

By Viridian - 12/5/2009 13:41 - United States

Today, I gave a big presentation at work. The manager decided to video tape it. I went through my presentation with ease and was confident I did a good job. My confidence was then lowered after watching the tape. Apparently, my boobs are much more interesting than what I had to say. FML

I agree, your life sucks

57466

You deserved it

7034

Favorite

By Bad at life - 18/10/2018 13:30

Today, I pulled a muscle in my face. Chewing gum. For the second time. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2007

You deserved it

581

Favorite

By Anonymous - 17/7/2013 01:55 - United States - Port Orchard

Today, I discovered that my 8-year old is not fully toilet trained when a turd fell out of his pants, shortly after introducing him to his new babysitter. FML

I agree, your life sucks

45454

You deserved it

9264

Favorite

By lovedbyallthewrongppl - 28/11/2010 01:03 - United States

Today, I was teaching my two year old daughter how to take a person's temperature. While I was sitting down, she came up behind me and shoved the thermometer in my ear hard. Now I can't hear out of my right ear, and I'm in excruciating pain. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31051

You deserved it

13563

Favorite

By lolk - 10/3/2013 07:41 - United States - Little Rock

Today, my boyfriend and I were on my bed when things started getting hot and it began to shake. My little sister called the entire family to the hall to listen to "the frogs in the wall". FML

I agree, your life sucks

22640

You deserved it

41508

Favorite

By ugh - 24/11/2014 12:40 - United States - Port Chester

Today, I was really excited to get a new bank account in my name. My parents wanted me to have it so they could transfer money from mine to theirs and vice versa. What excited me less was my father drunkenly accessing it and taking all my cash. FML

I agree, your life sucks

35075

You deserved it

4399

Favorite

By NicoleNoone - 1/8/2020 05:01

Banished

Today, my older sister told me about their table plan at their wedding. She is one of my best friends too, so I was shocked that I had been placed far away, and separated from my husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1454

You deserved it

119

Favorite

By Anonymous - 5/7/2016 16:19 - United States - South Sioux City

Today, my teacher marked a test question wrong, even though I was sure I got it right, so I went online to check. I found a government-approved website showing proof that my answer was correct. My teacher still counted it wrong, because, "we follow the book". That book's older than I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks

15619

You deserved it

859

Favorite

By Hungry - 27/12/2013 14:01 - United States - Appleton

Today, I got written up at work for clocking back in from lunch early. Yesterday I got a verbal warning for coming back late. I'm scared to go to lunch at all now. FML

I agree, your life sucks

43770

You deserved it

4659

Favorite

By Anonymous - 14/7/2014 23:52 - United States - Tacoma

Today, I went into my former workplace. While there, an ex-coworker told me that after I quit, they split my position into two separate jobs. When I worked there, my boss had told me to suck it up whenever I said there was too much work for just one person. FML

I agree, your life sucks

48715

You deserved it

3812

Favorite

By Anonymous - 14/4/2009 18:41 - United States

Today, I made an appointment with a therapist because lately I've been feeling alone and like no one cares about me. I waited at her office for about forty minutes before the receptionist informed me that she must have forgotten about the appointment. I was stood up by even my therapist. FML

I agree, your life sucks

94572

You deserved it

6244

Favorite

By walmart: first time, last time - 12/5/2013 16:37 - United States

Today, while I was out shopping, a fairly hideous-looking woman stormed up to me and accused me of ogling her, saying, "As if I'd ever date you!" Less than a minute later, she'd somehow managed to bully me into falsely admitting to it and apologizing. FML

I agree, your life sucks

41092

You deserved it

14685

Favorite

By blotchy-girl - 15/7/2009 04:00 - New Zealand

Today, my sister thought it would be funny to spray my face with my new tanning spray, which is only supposed to be used on arms and legs. I woke up and looked in the mirror to see an orange blotchy face staring back at me. My parents can't look at me without laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks

41956

You deserved it

6697

Favorite

By deservedly - 9/6/2014 16:28 - Canada - Calgary

Today, I clogged the only toilet at work. Thinking I could escape and blame someone else, I opened the door, only to see a line of people waiting outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks

47738

You deserved it

17335

Favorite

By poorkids - 31/10/2012 05:01 - United States - Auburn

Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML

I agree, your life sucks

37464

You deserved it

3997

Favorite

By lonelyguy321 - 27/7/2010 14:43 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to bed with three hot, half-naked girls beneath me. I was in the bunk above. Alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40116

You deserved it

16504

Favorite

By SlapAndTickle - 11/10/2013 03:04 - United States

Today, my mother kept nagging at me because my 9-month-old daughter only calms down when I play her metal. She demands I use gospel, otherwise she will turn into a "devil-worshipping lunatic like her mother". FML

I agree, your life sucks

47513

You deserved it

5130

Favorite

By Noname - 23/2/2009 04:50 - United States

Today, my sister had a friend over and I had just gotten out of the shower. I wrapped something around me and walked across the living room. When I walked through, they both started laughing hysterically. Turns out, I grabbed a poncho and the hole for the head ended up right over my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks

17242

You deserved it

41664

Favorite

By weddingblues - 30/5/2011 04:19 - United States

Today, my fiancé informed me he didn't want a regular wedding cake, he wants a Batman cake. I have nothing against this, except that he already decided the wedding theme would be Star Wars. Essentially, I'm marrying a child. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40472

You deserved it

23553

Favorite

By Anonymous - 11/3/2020 09:00

Honor amongst maids

Today, a good friend from childhood, who was my maid of honor four years ago, got married. Without me knowing about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1510

You deserved it

158

Favorite

By cheeseburglar_9000 - 21/3/2013 01:11 - United States - Saint Paul

Today, I learned that if not for my grandfather gifting my dad $200, I would have been named Anthrax. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36662

You deserved it

2844

Favorite

By TriangularBanana - 10/12/2016 22:50 - United States - Houston

Today, I babysat my little cousin. He thought that a glue stick would have the same effect as chapstick. FML

I agree, your life sucks

7703

You deserved it

727

Favorite

By Anonymous - 30/4/2015 17:33 - United Kingdom - Limavady

Today, someone at work took my delicate medication out of the fridge to make room for their lunch. Now my medication has expired. FML

I agree, your life sucks

33567

You deserved it

2577

Favorite

By sadgf - 25/2/2009 21:12 - United States

Today, my boyfriend said that being with me was his payment for past sins. FML

I agree, your life sucks

54608

You deserved it

6093

Favorite

By Anonymous - 9/4/2013 18:01 - United States

Today, at work as a gynecologist, I called in my last patient of the day. As soon as I took a peek, I noticed that she had stuck googly-eyes above her vagina. She told me with a straight face not to be afraid, because "She doesn't bite." FML

I agree, your life sucks

52899

You deserved it

5371

Favorite

By Anonymous - 7/1/2012 14:07 - Canada

Today, I am 8 weeks pregnant. I have debilitating 'morning sickness' all day. And now I get to add peeing my pants every time I throw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31561

You deserved it

4947

Favorite

By skunked - 18/6/2013 18:00 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was visiting my childhood home, and I checked out my old treehouse. A family of skunks had made it their home, and I was promptly sprayed upon entering. FML

I agree, your life sucks

45284

You deserved it

7048

Favorite

Add a comment

You must be logged in to be able to post comments!

Create my account Sign in

Top comments

By aupilot | 0

#137506 - Thursday 23 April 2009 23:16

Ouch. What a bitch.

By loyalwolf06 | 0

#137545 - Thursday 23 April 2009 23:21

It sucks to be going somewhere with only one shoe on though...how weird and embarrassing. :P Also depending on where you're going, it could be pretty messy without a shoe.

COMMENTS

By aupilot | 0

#137506 - Thursday 23 April 2009 23:16

Ouch. What a bitch.

Goldenchest | 14

#4177934 - Saturday 17 March 2012 15:29

You're waiting for a train... A train that will take you far away...

superpoptart | 24

#5252448 - Sunday 16 December 2012 16:08

HI PERSON FROM THE FUTURE :D I love you reference

abnormalbird | 11

#5851528 - Saturday 8 February 2014 1:54

No. It can take you anyywheeere.

By XanderK | 0

#137507 - Thursday 23 April 2009 23:16

Wow. YLIF.

By Bmlacme | 3

#137508 - Thursday 23 April 2009 23:16

AWW!! that suckss!! :[

By JadeRose_fml | 8

#137515 - Thursday 23 April 2009 23:17

damn. hope the shoe wasn't expensive. it sucks that you're down a shoe now! lol

By ohhboyy | 0

#137518 - Thursday 23 April 2009 23:17

eh it's not that much of an fml

By stargirl14 | 0

#137533 - Thursday 23 April 2009 23:19

what kind of shoes do you wear?! when someone walks on the back of my shoes that def doesnt happen

googlefrewdnoob | 0

#3357826 - Wednesday 28 September 2011 2:18

Springloaded sandals, idiot

By xTc_JEWboy | 0

#137536 - Thursday 23 April 2009 23:19

just a shoe
jew

By Jordie210 | 0

#137544 - Thursday 23 April 2009 23:20

boo hoo. get over it.

By loyalwolf06 | 0

#137545 - Thursday 23 April 2009 23:21

It sucks to be going somewhere with only one shoe on though...how weird and embarrassing. :P Also depending on where you're going, it could be pretty messy without a shoe.

By genius_man16 | 0

#137546 - Thursday 23 April 2009 23:21

If she didn't apologize it doubles the FML of this story.

If it was an expensive shoe, it triples it.