Okay, jokes not on ops ex for being a pathetic douche bag..sorry FML!

When you said "jokes on him" most people assumed you meant the bartender and not the ex. A little bit of rephrasing goes a long way!

Jokes on both of them really, he could have not been rude about something OP had no control over..

Why? If you're breaking up with someone you usually aren't going to retain good feelings for them, so why would you go out of your way to pay that respect? Sometimes breakups are messy and you literally never want to see someone's face again for as long as you live, much less in the very near future.

Why pay that respect? Oh I don't know, perhaps because most people aren't heartless bastards like you and may actually have cared for their now-exes at some point and still want to behave like an actual human being instead of like a complete asshole. Just a thought.

My ex cheated on me, and i wasn't going to see him for a few months. I tried to call a few times but he ignored me every time. So I dumped him over text.

Sorry, Daiyuki, this isn't working out. I want to stop seeing you. It's not me, it's you. I hope you'll find someone who likes dating an asshole.

27 - Exactly. If you can't, for some reason, meet up in person, then at least a phone call is better. By text or by Internet is a cop out for people who are too cowardly to be honest to someone's face - and if you're too much of a coward for that? You shouldn't be dating. I can see if you've been dating someone for like a week breaking up with them by phone, but once you've been together longer than that, you owe them the courtesy of a face to face meeting. It's just polite that way. My ex had done some pretty horrible things to me (like spiking my drinks at a party so I would get completely wasted so he could play out some creepy rape fantasy without my knowledge - my friend caught on and stopped it, thankfully). I had him meet me in a public place, where my parents were nearby - buy out of earshot - and broke up with him in person because despite the fact that he had been horrid towards the end, I liked him once, and I felt I owed him an explanation even though he'd been in the wrong. I dated him for about a year (I was 17-18). I've been with my current boyfriend for eight years now, and if, for some reason, I had to break up with him (I have no reason to, I'm happy), I would do it in person because eight years of your life is worth more than a text message.

Yea, but 90% of them aren't on her rung of the food chain.

Props to you for saying shitpancake. I'm more of a shartwaffle kind of person.

I couldn't never think of something that creative, and shitlord was taken.

And douchecanoe.

true.

Yeah how would that exactly go? "Oh, you're such a cute bartender. So handy with those bottles. IT REMINDS ME OF MY SICK BOYFRIEND WHO DUMPED ME ON FACEBOOK!"

#8 FYL for not knowing how to read.

I misread it the first time as well. Dot be so critical

I don't know how to read sometimes too. Then I bend over and wait for the FML community to kick my ass.