Today, I had to eat my breakfast in terrified silence, as my hungover mother staggered into the room, shouted at the kettle for not boiling fast enough, and after a few seconds, screamed that I'd sabotaged it. I'm now grounded for supposedly trying to fuck with her head. FML
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By
Dblocker
| 18
Are you sure she was only hungover?
By
gracehi
| 31
Wait! You mean New Zealand has alcohol? And alcohol in New Zealand fucks you up like anywhere else? And it's just as addictive??? NO WAY!!!
COMMENTS
By
Dblocker
| 18
Are you sure she was only hungover?
Reply
TurtleSmile
| 14
Sounds like she was still drunk. You should ground her for being under the influence.
Reply
opendoorclosed
| 8
Or using something else... I'm sorry to hear that
Reply
jetsown08
| 21
So sounds like OPs mon was downing the tequila at 6:15 a.m. Good way to wake up, and it's a great way to stay in shape. (+100 internetz to whoever gets that Family Guy reference)
Reply
GirlYouNasty
| 11
19- Mr. Rides-a-ten-speed-everywhere guy!
Reply
TheFuckerofShit
| 16
1, I love your profile picture.
Reply
jezane
| 9
?
Reply
TheThuglife_fml
| 2
Thuglife.
Reply
rsunshine2020
| 13
Most likely she won't even remember she grounded you... Hopefully :)
Reply
Kiyda
| 11
You should stop trying to fuck with your mother's head. It's not very nice, and the kettle doesn't want to be brought into the middle of it.
By
Cyanide03
| 7
Someone needs to see a therapist. sorry, OP :/
Reply
I_iz_B_a_troll
| 23
Well if it isn't the pot calling the kettle black..
Reply
Dixbfloppin
| 11
More like a rehabilitation center.
Reply
MormonPornstar
| 7
When that word is used, all I see is 'the rapist'.
Analyst + therapist = Analrapist
Making 23k a year, but what a title!
Analyst + therapist = Analrapist
Making 23k a year, but what a title!
Reply
maosquare
| 18
Psychotherapist = Psycho the rapist.
By
daliagrande
| 17
Well that escalated quickly...
Reply
calipop99
| 0
The FML had nothing to escalate from... Your point is invalid
Reply
Jaxx66
| 21
17- Tell me how you came to this conclusion? It did indeed 'escalate'. From mom yelling at the kettle, to her brain suddenly deciding that she needs to be paranoid and blame someone for her misfortune. And then basically attacking OP for no reason. It was terrible! Stupid kettle.
I say she needs a stove top one for backup. Those electric ones can be pesky sometimes.
I say she needs a stove top one for backup. Those electric ones can be pesky sometimes.
Reply
untamable_mare
| 4
Lmao. Anchorman is an awesome movie. Anyone making an "invalid" comment about your comment, should obviously be smack in the mouth for just being dumb. Just saying.
By
DatRealAssTruth
| 3
Why do idiots say they deserved it jus because jus because they can? it doesnt make sense.
Reply
emeraldisle
| 30
Your comment doesn't make sense.
Reply
deegeebee
| 10
Well, a little thing called democracy. But yes, in general, people are jerks.
Reply
SoMuchSnailGame
| 3
40, please expand on democracy's impact on ydi.
By
coastiepat
| 0
Haha alcoholics live in new Zealand?
Reply
gracehi
| 31
Wait! You mean New Zealand has alcohol? And alcohol in New Zealand fucks you up like anywhere else? And it's just as addictive??? NO WAY!!!
Reply
onlychildFTW
| 33
Who would have guessed New Zealand has that?!?!?! Thanks for teaching me something new!...
Reply
silverstream20
| 20
Wait everyone didn't you know? New Zealand is a actual country and guess what, it has people who wait for it drink!!! Amazing.
By
nightslayer
| 6
Sounds like someone woke up on the crazy end of the bed
Reply
zandalee
| 19
I love the wording of this FML. Go the Kiwi's in the Test-match tonight against the Ausi's!!
By
mollysticks
| 10
Make her breakfast with soft gooey boiled eggs and sausage. Revenge.
Reply
trippythehippy
| 6
Nah a greasy pork sandwich served in a dirty ashtray
By
gracehi
| 31
If she was that fucked up, she probably won't remember grounding you.
By
olpally
| 32
She's fucked up in her own head... Yikes...seems like she's had more than just alcohol in her system...
By
lmaouloser
| 5
What did you do to the kettle?! How could you?! Plus you should have had coffee ready... Kind thing to do. Not saying I'd do it, but you wouldn't be grounded!