Love: Today, I found out that even though my girlfriend of 3 years...

By Anonymous - 20/04/2014 17:58 - United Kingdom - Wigan

Today, I found out that even though my girlfriend of 3 years believes sex before marriage or even me just jacking off is a big no, doing online strip-shows for money is a big yes for her. Both times that I've proposed, she claimed she isn't "ready" for marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 594

You deserved it 9 555

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Same thing different taste

Get out of here

By Cpt Colin - 03/01/2012 07:17 - United States

Today, my girlfriend hated the idea of sex so much she was willing to give me money for a stripper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 860

You deserved it 5 974

By Chewy - 05/01/2010 10:45 - United Kingdom

Today, after my girlfriend telling me for years that she would marry me in a heartbeat, I finally proposed. She said no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 538

You deserved it 4 265

By Anonymous - 19/10/2009 07:10 - Indonesia

Today, when I proposed to my girlfriend of 8 years, she said no because she thought we were moving too fast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 785

You deserved it 3 403

By Anonymous - 22/04/2015 14:24 - United States - Altamonte Springs

Today, my religious girlfriend convinced me to let her take my virginity. A few hours later, she broke up with me, crying and saying I was going to hell for having sex before marriage. But apparently she isn't, and she can't be with someone who "tempts" her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 267

You deserved it 3 705

By chao - 22/12/2009 02:47 - United States

Today, I asked my girlfriend what she thought of us getting married some day. She said she wasn't sure about me yet and that we may want to go in different directions soon. We've been dating for three years and I had the ring in my pocket at the moment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 230

You deserved it 3 864

The magic of love

By robot lady - 23/09/2020 23:01

Today, I learned just how “old fashioned” my girlfriend is when we talked about marriage. She said it should be approached as a logically as possible and that I make an ideal partner, based on my ability to provide. And while she sees sex as uninteresting, it is a wifely duty she’s willing to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 401

You deserved it 199

Family values

By Anonymous - 23/05/2015 03:44 - United States - Mountain View

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said she wanted to accept, but that she'd basically have to get her mom's permission first. Apparently the answer was no. The worst thing is that she really is this unhealthily dependent on her mom, and probably wasn't lying about needing her permission. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 015

You deserved it 3 400

By Limalia - 24/01/2011 21:00 - Switzerland

Today, one week after my girlfriend berated me for not being invested enough in our relationship, I proposed to her. Her answer? "I meant give me an orgasm, not a ring!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 327

You deserved it 10 632

By Anonymous - 16/11/2013 00:10 - Australia - Ascot Vale

Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents, despite my long-standing protests. Over the next hour, they asked her if she'd ever considered becoming a swinger, why not, if she'd ever consider it in future, and to keep them in mind if she does. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 466

You deserved it 3 086

By Anonymous - 05/02/2013 06:40 - United States - Northbrook

Today, after trying to convince my girlfriend to have sex for almost 16 months, she finally said yes. I couldn't get it up the second she said it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 138

You deserved it 39 666

coolcocoxxx 12

Monday 21 April 2014 2:02

Get out of that. Now.

friedpwnadge 25

Monday 21 April 2014 2:03

She's probably sleeping with other men if she has that kind of double standard.

Comments

sabine123_fml 5

Monday 21 April 2014 12:51

She uses sex for $$ Not love bail now

r4m2k 10

Monday 21 April 2014 12:57

Get out, fast. Run, don't look back. She's a train wreck waiting to happen.

InvisibleMonster_fml 16

Monday 21 April 2014 13:25

Dump her.

6dandaman5 8

Monday 21 April 2014 19:19

Hidden profile hmmm

HowsBoutaRoadie 8

Monday 21 April 2014 13:37

dump that *****

carbonbasedcynic 17

Monday 21 April 2014 13:44

right. why are you still with her again?

jh921971 10

Monday 21 April 2014 14:13

You gotta ask yourself, are you happy with the relationship? If no, get out of it.

superdom 12

Monday 21 April 2014 14:41

Leave her she's not worth it AT ALL

blobishness 8

Monday 21 April 2014 14:42

Leave bro. Now

JCal585 8

Monday 21 April 2014 14:49

Dude. RUN!

z3vil 11

Monday 21 April 2014 14:52

Time to get a new girlfriend...

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The Top

Today, my mother, who thinks I'm a virgin, called me while I was having sex with my boyfriend. I have to answer every time she calls or she freaks out. I ended the conversation quickly and hung up. Or so I thought. She listened in to the rest of our 20-minute lovemaking session, and I have some explaining to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 791

You deserved it 1 708

Today, my husband and I have officially become that couple that has to schedule sex. Between his working, my going back to school, raising kids, doing housework and homework, we just haven’t had time. Last night we tried to be spontaneous and get it on. We both fell asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 586

You deserved it 245

The Top

Today, I finally found a cute dress that hugged my curves and hid my imperfections. I wore it to my friend's house, and was feeling pretty good about myself, until some pregnant woman walked into the room wearing the exact same thing. It was a maternity dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 629

You deserved it 7 275

Today, I got an exercise wheel for my cat. He took a nap on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 585

You deserved it 301

Today, I went to the cinema. The lady at the reception gave me my ticket and wished me a good screening. My reply? "Thanks, you too." FML

I agree, your life sucks 631

You deserved it 286

Today, I was leaving the train station when a man came up to me and asked me if I have an unlimited metrocard to swipe him in. I did have an unlimited card so I told him sure. While taking out my metrocard from my wallet, he grabbed my wallet and ran away as fast as he could. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 350

You deserved it 27 953

Today, a friend of mine has stopped brushing his teeth, because, "animals don’t brush their teeth either." You know what else animals don’t do? Smoke a pack of Marlboros a day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 028

You deserved it 76

Today, as I'd been going to a gym with my wife as a guest on her account, I joined as a regular member. However, before I had time to go under my own membership, the gym closed down due to the coronavirus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 525

You deserved it 243

Same thing different taste

Get out of here

The magic of love

Family values

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