Today, I found out that applying toothpaste to your penis to make it taste good for your girlfriend is not a good idea. FML
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By
robc32ca
| 4
washing is a better option
By
Jimboom
| 11
Ha ha. I bet you think the idea of spicing up your sex life constitutes putting curry power on your penis.
COMMENTS
By
robc32ca
| 4
washing is a better option
Reply
seanders
| 10
they have flavored lubes for that purpose...
Reply
Alex_The_Human
| 2
*facepalm*
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BikeAllDay818
| 6
I used some and my gf really liked the taste of my strawberry kiwi dick :)
but you should still clean it.
but you should still clean it.
Reply
FMLephant
| 2
Altoids in her mouth would be better while she blows you.
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brainsoverbeauty
| 21
Fluoride toothpaste burns in your mouth so chances are it will cause harm to other sensitive areas. My suggestion? Next time try that other white stuff....whipped cream, unless you like the burning sensation of course.
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jmmille
| 0
Hey Op, I think you should try Icy Hot. I hear it tastes great. lol
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HunterDanielle
| 3
^ my friend did that on accident & he cried for hours xD
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robotnhi
| 0
try whipped cream or chocolate sauce instead. mmm
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docscientist
| 9
Your problem is, you didn't use Icy Hot.
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tktom7
| 6
I told my friend to rub one out with icy hot... long story short it did not end well.
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bioboy725
| 10
you know that prank you so with whippedcream when someone's asleep. I've done that with icy hot. it was great!
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dunkmiester
| 0
hey robothi want my number?
Reply
SpicyDuck
| 22
They do make flavored lubes for that. If she doesn't like those then have her chew some gum, just make sure she knows not to chew while she's doing the deed.
By
BikeAllDay818
| 6
haha wow what happened?
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insanesna1l
| 0
it would burn I imagine. or make it sparkling white.
Reply
BikeAllDay818
| 6
haha yeah I'm thinking it would burn, but only if it got into his pee-hole
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insanesna1l
| 0
no it would burn all over :-) the chemicals in it are there to fight plaque and gum disease. his better option would be to use honey dust or actual honey.
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ArmedcrackerR6
| 8
A better solution would be to stop being an idiot. Oh and by the way it doesn't burn it's just a stupid thing to do.
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BikeAllDay818
| 6
Well either way yeah it's stupid, he should just wash it really good with some scented body was, then give his girlfriend some 5 gum and let her do work!
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Bano360
| 25
24, toothpaste can burn certain areas of the body. As the penis is a sensitive part of the body, I would assume it a burned.
Reply
JaydnGage
| 0
40, Do not disagree with 24. He clearly has experience in this as he said it doesn't burn.
Reply
SeasonedLemur
| 5
I can shine a light on this subject! It doesn't sting it just drys the head of your cock terribly! Don't try it unless your prepared to shell out for plently of moisturiser to bring the feeling back to your meat stick!
Reply
wunderwaffe
| 0
actually depends on what toothpaste like the extra whitening ones would burn alot
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DaveOnDope
| 4
Put some on one of your nipples and tell us how it feels.
Reply
musicbunny
| 1
shuddup, I believe u r the only idiot here. D^:<
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JacksonHorton
| 0
your an idiot. it burns like hell. I would know hah, don't say something that you don't know the facts of yourself
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Jackbagger_fml
| 0
it actually feels pretty awesome but I used a weird kind of toothpaste so I don't know what regular would do
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ramirezlmt
| 0
Are you guys seriously discussing what toothpaste to use? Here's a idea use mouthwash! "well the one with no alcohol doesn't burn" "What about aftershave?" "Hand sanitizer? (It feels nice and warm try it!)" Too bad the toothpaste didn't make you guys infertile.
DON'T HAVE KIDS
DON'T HAVE KIDS
Reply
Ryanfmlfiend
| 0
89 looks exactly like me wtf
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lilgjc2010
| 0
you should put cocaine on it!!! it's always fun
Reply
im2cool2fml
| 0
he should've tried peanut butter
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sexisbad
| 1
I giggled for a long bit after reading this comment
Reply
snowboardboy
| 0
ya 5 gum works great when a girl gives u a bj ezspecialy cobalt aka pepermint :D
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Nutz321
| 0
24- yes, it does burn. I've tried it.
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Ultimate_Batman
| 28
It burns very much.
By
xxfezxx
| 0
what did you think would happened? did she at least get to try it
Reply
therealdavid
| 0
If she did, she probably didn't finish since it'd taste like tooth paste and ointment for the burning!;)
Reply
nowIshallrise
| 0
Or maybe she saw his dick and said "THERE'S my toothbrush!"
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Alderman55
| 0
that's wut I wuz thinkin
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TheDrop
| 0
1) OPS GIRLFRIEND DOESN'T LIKE TO BRUSH HER TEETH
2) this is the only way gets to tell people about his pathetic sex life
2) this is the only way gets to tell people about his pathetic sex life
Reply
chickgirlxccc
| 0
Haha funny I think it would burn! cause getting toothpaste by my snakebites burn..
P.S love your jacket!!
P.S love your jacket!!
By
that_is_Nathy
| 9
I had to laugh a bit, actually not only a bit. Poor you XDXD But YDI since it's your own fault
By
Alleged_Cranium
| 7
Does it look like a toothbrush?
Reply
GoingLesbian
| 0
HAH win...
By
biohaz_fml
| 0
what r u 7 years old. well did ur girlfried like it??
Reply
coolkid_matt
| 11
are* you* your* friend* fix the mistakes idiot.
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NancyDeebensDPDS
| 0
^ Are. Is supposed to be capitalized, hypocrite.
Reply
ImaginaryFoe
| 0
#15 was providing the correct spelling of #6's words. Since "are" was not at the beginning of #6's sentence, it did not need to be capitalised.
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ashtin85
| 0
^capitalized.
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savveh
| 0
^ People from other English-speaking countries outside of America spell things differently sometimes. "Capitalised" instead of "capitalized" is one these cases. I don't know where ImaginaryFoe is from but that's probably the case.
Reply
DocBastard
| 38
Their are way to many grammer errors in this thread for me too even start. If you want to be a grammer nazi, leave it two the proffesionals.
Reply
3p1c_fml
| 1
*There, *to... oh, umm, uhhhhh... Doc, I didn't see you there..
Reply
blkandredenvy
| 0
haha 97 and 101. if people can understand the comment then who really cares. this is not being published in the newspaper or an important article. this just for fun.
by the way 101, it should be There* too* to* and to* again. just saying lol
by the way 101, it should be There* too* to* and to* again. just saying lol
Reply
RedPillSucks
| 31
Dudes, if you're going to be a grammar nazi, at least learn the different ways things are spelled in the various forms of written english out there.
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DocBastard
| 38
Red - various ways of what now? There is only one way to spell things in English. It's only one language. Geez. Get a clue, man.
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Keyman1212
| 14
I've always wanted to ask y'all, is the opposite of a grammar Nazi an illiterate Jew? Your thoughts.
Reply
Edword23
| 2
Its actually an illiterate gypsy. It has to be the minority of screwed over people... Not too sure why.
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elizabeth705
| 0
Doc: thats not true. In America we spell words different than in England. Examples: "color" and "favorite" are American. "colour" and "favourite" are English. Those are just some of the most common.
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savveh
| 0
That bastard of a doctor became a doctor and not an English major for a reason, can't you see? Don't make fun!
Reply
Travesty0242
| 0
I'm Canadian and we spell it colour and favourite.
And I'm really amused at the fact that no one bothered to correct the word professional.
And I'm really amused at the fact that no one bothered to correct the word professional.
Reply
hotdogcore
| 9
*professionals
I win.
I win.
Reply
5t3ff1k4h
| 44
168 - No, you lose. Doc misspelled "professionals" on purpose. *facepalm*
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OuchAndGoodfight
| 5
Doc, fail. It's professionals*, sire.
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steezyjustice
| 0
you all need too get youre sarcasm meters checked. The doc was most likely making those mistakes on purpise.
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drumpom22
| 0
you're very pretty!
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CakeBaker11
| 0
shut up doc! your a dipshit I'm 14 and smarter than you, red was right he worded that sentence correctly, there's many differences in written English, some words are spelled two ways and rules that apply to certain words or letters change in different circumstances, written English is one of the hardest languages to lean.
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xX_LilSammie_Xx
| 4
You forgot grammar.
Reply
Arraggatis
| 0
197 - If you really think you are smarter than Doc, please learn proper English. Also, please Google "sarcasm" and let me know what it says. When you find out, I think you'll realize that these comments are filled with it. Thank you!
Reply
Ishidoro
| 3
Ha, I see what you did there.
Reply
carolinetheberry
| 0
Well are YOU 7 ? because you type like one.
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cutiepie343
| 7
Wow. You guys didn't even notice they spelt girlfriend wrong.
By
iluvfmls456
| 0
I hope she got a toothbrush and tried to scrape it off
By
Juliaa15
| 6
i would imagine it tingled. Dumbass, it's called common sense.
By
Jimboom
| 11
Ha ha. I bet you think the idea of spicing up your sex life constitutes putting curry power on your penis.
Reply
Dementos
| 2
EPIC WIN ABOVE
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NurseNasty
| 12
uber LOL :-D
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Quagmire_ladies
| 9
LMFAO!!!! WIN!
By
jigglesden
| 1
guess you need to brush up on your 'oral' hygiene, huh?
Reply
deaper
| 15
ok I'm SHOCKED it took that long for someone to make this comment! But to the person who made the comment I say:
:: Golf clap :: Good show ole' chap! Good show!
:: Golf clap :: Good show ole' chap! Good show!
Reply
africanelephants
| 7
that's such a bad joke that its funny good call