By emonsteadman - 28/05/2012 14:05 - United States - Denton

Today, at my job as a lifeguard, I told a teenager to, "Walk please." He then threw his soda at me as he ran away. We aren't allowed off stand unless it's an emergency, so I baked in that soda for 30 minutes. FML
I agree, your life sucks 27 149
You deserved it 3 358

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Well make sure u dont save his life if he ever needs the help...

What a waste of soda


Well make sure u dont save his life if he ever needs the help...

Don't fuck with the people who handle your food and DEFINITELY don't fuck with the people responsible for your life.

well, at least he lost his soda.

what flavor was it?

Maybe it was baking soda ^.^ bahaha

How is one supposed to enforce rules at the pool if they can't leave the stand? That makes no sense, ask your boss about being allowed to get down and actually enforcing those rules

FMLshark 12

I had a soda baked lifeguard once. Not as good as you'd expect.

47- what do you suggest he do to the teenager to enforce the rules? He'll get kicked out eventually but it's not the lifeguards job to get distracted from his JOB and yell at asshole teens.

55 - while I understand that keeping watch over the pool is - and most definitely should be - the most important thing, most pools I go to don't have anyone else watching to kick out those people, and more often than not the same assholes cause tons of problems. So being able to ask people to leave the area, especially after they showed that they have no respect for those who are keeping people safe, would make sense to me.

71- unless he's being paid to be a bouncer too, then that's not his job. I understand that most pools are understaffed, and it is a shame that the kid wasn't kicked out immediately, but like I said the lifeguard needs to do his job. Fuck his life for not being able to wash off though.

dance531 3

I like pie.

I think OP could be new at lifeguarding, because I was a lifeguard before and if someone at a pool throws something at you or violates the rules in some way when you're on duty then the lifeguard can ban the person from the pool completely.. Or tell your boss and the boss will ban them. Banhammer!

47- yelling at yahoos would distract him from the pool. He should have a Wally talkie to tell some one to get that boy and bring him a wet towel.

every pool that i have worked at, it has been their job. as a life guard you job is not just to save the occasional kid that thinks they can swim but cant, but also to enforce the rules of the pool and keep it a safe environment, running is usually always listed as a violation of pools rules, so the "life"guard was infact doing their job, but was unable to execute to the full extent of their ability.

What a waste of soda

At least the ladies will be all over you. Us ladies love soda flavored lifeguard.

xoconnie 8

Well, he could have thrown much worse.. urine, diahrrea, guts, slime....think about it man, be happy it was only soda.

There are starving children in africa.!

To bad the I'm rubber your glue saying only applies to words and not soda.

hunterluv1 20

Too* youre*

hunterluv1 20

142 - ok. I give you that one haha :)

I was in a rush I was almost finished taking a crap. Eyyy take it easy huh.

Nothing like having a soda tan..

Seems refreshing

Chicken marinated in soda is pretty damn good. I'm just sayin'.

reallytho3 11

Let's eat!

LO388 7

So are steak tips marinated in coke and a little brown sugar! Sounds weird, but give it a try!

Beer can chicken is even better

Brown sugar works great in marinades.

Should of acted like you liked it, then he would of been pissed he wasted his soda.

Mmm! My favorite! *Starts licking self*

I always thought baking soda was good for burns.

Okay, that's pretty funny.

ArrickMorris 4

FYI for any burn, except a sunburn, you shouldn't put any kind of ointment or cream especially not a powder on it.

Arrick, there are two problems with your comment: 1) My comment was a joke 2) Every burn should have something put on it EXCEPT first degree. Second degree burns, especially deep ones, should have an antibiotic cream applied daily. First degree burns (including sunburns) don't need anything. Aloe or lidocaine gel will help it feel better, but it will not help it heal better or faster. Please don't argue with me on this, because I personally guarantee you will lose.

3) DocBastard is actually a doctor

4) I want to go to medical school.

KiddNYC1O 20

5) It's the Internet! Yeah, baby!


113, where's the ticket booth for said Bandwagon?

127, walmart. Everything is at walmart.

RandomComments 6

I'd be interested to see DocBastard have a comment war against another doctor on FML.

Well atleast you tasted good?

"Yes of course he tasted amazing, the soda was a nice flavorful touch!" said the millions of cannibals lined up to taste test the life guards.

Shia Lebeouf agrees.

Sucks for you since it would look too ridiculous to lick the delicious soda off of yourself.

kitkat2014 6

Make his life miserable when you go on break xD

kitkat2014 6

I wouldn't want a job where I get pop thrown on me anyways. Immature kids need to be taught a lesson the old fashioned way.

kickuwithmyfist 1

41-hell yeah! Kick his ass, sea bass!!!=D

peachyFML 17

Some people can't be picky as to what their job is.

kitkat2014 6

96- He's a lifeguard lol That's definitely his choice considering all the training and certification he has to acquire to be one.

unknown_user5566 26

99- Your comment contradicts your original statement. Considering OP had to go above and beyond a high school diploma and standard interview to get his job, I think it's safe to assume he doesn't want to risk losing it over some bratty teenager.

kitkat2014 6

159- you don't have to go above and beyond a high school diploma to be a lifeguard!!!! Bahahaha!!!!! My friend is 16 years old and he's a certified lifeguard at a public pool. Maybe you should learn some facts before you open your mouth ;)

unknown_user5566 26

I should've said and/or when referencing the high school diploma and standard job interview. My point, which very obviously went over your head, is that typically one needs to undergo training, certifications, etc that would not be required at a "normal" job to obtain a lifeguard position. Therefore you should be able to safely assume that OP will not want to throw his job out the window because of some kid.

Haha at lease it was soda and not pee.

KiddNYC1O 20

It wasn't pee, though. Soda gets extremely sticky.

I didn't say it was pee. I said it was better soda, rather than pee.

61: At least** If you're going to be a grammar nazi on a typo, at least have the decency to do it right. You're giving the rest of us a bad name!

BandWagonGuy 8

A bad name??? Bahaha you guys are called frickin' grammar nazis.

I'm sorry it was an autocorrection, calm your tits people, you knew what I meant so shut up. Don't like it? Get the fuck out. Thank you.