By daughter of a gullible cunt - 13/01/2013 21:02 - Australia

Today, as per usual, my mother went to see her psychic, who told her that one of her children is harbouring a "dark secret". Now we're all grounded until one of us confesses our obviously non-existent secret. FML
I agree, your life sucks 39 756
You deserved it 2 673

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lenamartinovic 13

How do you know your sister hasn't been traveling with the Doctor while you're sleeping?

Bit of a harsh username there, OP.


lenamartinovic 13

How do you know your sister hasn't been traveling with the Doctor while you're sleeping?

Because the planet hasn't been moved to a nebula, a Titanic hasn't fallen out of the sky, the atmosphere hasn't been even partially converted into clone feed, nothing's hit Big Ben....should I continue?

You forgot about the aliens. The biggest relief- no anal probing, that's the scary stuff right there. Edit: Anal probing has nothing to do with supernatural events, sorry for the crap comment, just thought about it.

50- What aliens? ;D

It's a reference by the way...cos you're not supposed to remember them

dmoran20 27

She keeps going because its bigger on the inside!

I'm sorry, my mom wastes so much of my dad's money on that stuff, it's all a sham and self-fulfilling prophesies. :/

Prophecies* Sorry, it's in my nature. And come on guys this comment wasn't that thumbs down worthy. "Psychics" are shameful, I don't know how it's actually an allowed practice, it's like legal con-artist practice.

Yeah, she's being thumbed down because of her reputation rather than her comment, which wasn't complete crap like most others she's posted. Kind of pathetic on the part of the thumbs-downers, to be honest, though I know there are a bunch of people on here who believe in the whole psychic con.

I feel sorry for the people who thumbed this down. Psychics should be charged with fraud unless they 1) inform their customers that their predictions are for entertainment purposes only or 2) can back up their claims with proof. You wouldn't want other businesses to take your money without providing a product, right? EDIT: That's stupid if they're thumbing her down based on her reputation. That's like denying that the sky is blue because Hitler thought so, too. Lol

I wonder if they'd also believe I have a bridge to sell them...

Woah hold the banana, you can sell me a bridge? Well guess what... Sold! I've already sent the money so don't bother sending it back, I wont take no for an answer.

Tell me how london bridge looks in your back yard. Only history majors will get this.

Sorry 30, did you say psychics should be charged with fraud? If we follow that logic, people who go to psychics should be charged with criminal stupidity.

slimjim8094 12

Can we finally charge people with criminal stupidity? Thank god, I've been looking forward to this day for so many years!

#74, a lot of times people who go to psychics are in mourning and looking to contact their dead loved ones. Maybe they should be allowed to throw away their money if they want to, but the people who take it shouldn't legally be allowed to lie to them about it (like, have a disclaimer or something at least). Does that make sense?

shan88 14

2. and OP I'm sorry, my mum spends so much money on psychics and she takes their word above everyone else and believes every single thing that the psychic says/does. It's so upsetting and "psychics" should be charged and shut down for good.

56 - I would tell you how London Bridge looks in my back yard, but alas, it keeps falling down!

appleash 6


Well 85 (aka 30), I see your point. but I think it's not up to psychics to discourage idiots. If I sold, say, fresh air in front of my house for $1 and people were willing to pay for it, why should I tell them I'm not actually giving them anything for their money.

Bit of a harsh username there, OP.

Well, it IS Australia. (I kid. But I've heard that non-American English speakers tend to have fewer reservations about the word "****". Personally, I have no problem with it!)

minorcrisis 8

Thelsland, I agree with everything you said... I'm not sure why your first comment got down voted.

I agree with theIsland as well. My mother has always stressed how she believes that that word is the worst word there is. i can't stand using it. It's not like I condemn those who do use it, I just hating using it myself and cringe when I heard it used. If I ever called my mother that, I wouldn't be allowed back at my home until I wrote her an entire essay about how terrible the word is and how sorry I am. And even then I would be in deep shit. And my parents are not strict, just demand respect and calling someone that is the ultimate sign of disrespect in my home.

I definitely agree. Why would someone say that about their mother? Even of it's true you know, don't make such an explicit username about it...

slimjim8094 12

It might interest you to know that the word '****' is almost 800 years old and wasn't originally obscene, just the Old English word for, well, what it means now in the nonderogatory sense. There were streets called 'gropecunt lane' in a lot of English towns, which were exactly as they sounded... Point being, it's become a bad word, it didn't start as one. But most of the curse words are from vernacular Old English, while the medical or formal terms are Latin.

Yeah in our house that word had just always been condemned hahaha. And if my mother knew I said anything like that about her she would kick me from one end of the country to another.

It's a disgusting term that far too many Aussies take pride in.

Overall swearing at your parents is disrespectful.

Just admit it. You touch yourself at night when no one can see

I thought everyone does that and then denies it. :)

No we don't. At least not deny it. You're drunk aren't you?

nycwrestler 17

You're a penguin, aren't you?

Oh but you are always being seen...whether its by a someone or someTHING 0_o

That's what I thought! Lol.

Make up a secret. It should be believable, yet not too serious, so Mom will have the satisfaction of knowing your "secret".

"My darkest secret is that I think you're wasteful for giving money over to a con artist." (I personally have no views on psychics other than they're beyond unlikely.)

VScpu 3

Mom, dad. You guys are adopted

Every kid has a secret. Whether it is dark or not is another matter.

Every kid gets a dark secret at some point or another..

That, my friends, is why psychics suck.

That, and the fact that they're conning you for money.

"Yes mom, the dark secret is that we all ******* hate your worthless psychic and hope she doesn't foresee herself stepping in front of a bus."

I predict that she'll be getting conned out of more money like that in the future.

I'm sorry mom, my secret is, your adopted! I should have told you years ago but I never thought you could face it.

Just tell her your "Dark secret" is that you shower naked :o... it's crazy, but it just might work.

nycwrestler 17

Showering naked? That's unheard of!

It's illegal in some countries..

babygirl0232 8

I have a deep dark secret. I shower naked. Then after I'm done showering naked I get out and put clothes on.

R4inb0wBrit3 13

You animal!