Today, a drunk man walked into my house at 2pm, screaming out, "Honey, I'm home!" He had the wrong house, but it looks like I've finally met my new neighbour. FML
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By
DocBastard
| 38
Perhaps you should think about locking your door. And getting an alarm. And a dog. A big dog like a German shepherd, not a little dog like a chihuahua. No one likes those yappy little fucks.
By
MeTheBeast
| 22
At least he had the decency to call you honey ;)
COMMENTS
By
MeTheBeast
| 22
At least he had the decency to call you honey ;)
Reply
TheCaramelKing
| 11
Calling someone honey doesn't make one forget about a drunk man walking into their house at 2 o'clock.
Reply
zBLAKEz
| 23
He does sound like a real gentlemen. OP should give him a chance!
Reply
ChevyRedneck85
| 13
You leave your house unlocked?
Reply
starile
| 19
Why, yes, #67, that's how all the fun happens! I don't see you gaining any enviable FML fame, what with your door locking ways!
Reply
ChevyRedneck85
| 13
Well I live in the middle of nowhere, so I leave mine unlocked. But I also have an extensive gun collection....
By
aliyourpally
| 12
Drinking early?
Reply
AnOriginalName
| 19
Or still drunk from the night previous. OP's neighbour likes to party hard.
By
taylorafterdark
| 16
You should have played along ;)
Reply
Little4Bear
| 10
No, that would've been super creepy. Who knows what OP's neighbor does with his "honey".
By
DocBastard
| 38
Perhaps you should think about locking your door. And getting an alarm. And a dog. A big dog like a German shepherd, not a little dog like a chihuahua. No one likes those yappy little fucks.
Reply
CallMeMcFeelii
| 13
She lives in Canada. No one locks their door in Canada!
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TheCaramelKing
| 11
They're nice, not idiots.
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zBLAKEz
| 23
Trevor in GTA V broke that stereotype.
Reply
josh7279
| 7
Nobody likes the ankle biters.
Reply
harmtouch16
| 11
I have a 7 lb little chi/Maltese mix that I adore, but my husband calls her a "large sewer rat" lol. However, she's great at notifying us of intruders!
Reply
jkmartinjk
| 16
I'm from Canada, and my parents are OBSESSED with locking our door, and we live on a mountain. But I do know people who leave their doors unlocked in more residential areas, because 'If it's locked, they'll break in anyway, at least we won't have broken windows!' Canadian logic.
Reply
starile
| 19
Strangely enough, my door alarm IS a giant German Shepherd with yappy little chihuahuas in its mouth so when it barks it shoots chihuahuas at you! How did you know??
Reply
sodapop3
| 5
comment win
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sanecatlady
| 13
I do.
Reply
LynxieLynx
| 17
10- I live in Canada... And i lock doors...
*random meep sound*
*random meep sound*
Reply
tounces7
| 27
Except pretty much everyone who read this thread probably immediately guessed that the OP was in Canada.
By
Jelbeztok
| 17
2pm's a little early to be drunk isnt it?
Reply
jw90
| 18
It's never to early.
Reply
Faff
| 20
every time is partytime!
By
MoistWipe
| 8
That's like me at my best friends house
Reply
DocBastard
| 38
Nothing says "I'm cool" more than comparing yourself to a slobbering drunk idiot who doesn't recognise his own house.
Reply
Ari1337
| 15
except making meth. nothing is cooler than making meth.
Reply
NoMore_CoolNames
| 14
Yep, for about 20 years my uncle was the coolest man in Louisville.
By
challan
| 19
I hope you had him sign over his paycheck and make you a sandwich before sending him to the right house.
Reply
Metal_Avenger
| 9
If he can't find the right house i wouldn't trust him making me a sandwich
Reply
starile
| 19
Drunk sandwiches are the best sandwiches!
By
Awahso
| 25
Well at least he is friendly.
By
Pauschinator
| 22
You should have asked if he wanted dinner.
By
queerdragon
| 20
I would still suggest locking your doors. While Canada might seem safe, the American in me is saying "more locks, big dogs, get guns, bars on your windows!!!!
Reply
kinsmas
| 18
Most Canadians don't lock their door when they're home because, for the most part, we welcome visitors. Doors get locked at night and when no one is home.
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queerdragon
| 20
If my neighbor walked into my house drunk, then I'd still lock it to be safe.
Also, I am so antisocial, I pretend not to be home when my family forces themselves over for a visit.
Also, I am so antisocial, I pretend not to be home when my family forces themselves over for a visit.
Reply
Jezzikah
| 11
I live in Canada and my door is locked 24/7, even if I'm home.
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TheDrifter
| 23
That's weird. But I'm from a small town, if someone stumbles in drunk we just have a beer, chat a minute and you point them in the right direction. My inner Canuck says "say hello, introduce yourself and send him on his way"
Reply
love_me_electric
| 20
I'm Canadian, and most people I know do not lock their doors during the day if they're home unless they live in a bad area. In a small town you could probably walk into any house you wanted to at 2pm.
Edit: Also, I don't think I've EVER seen a non-commercial building in Canada that has bars on the windows.
Edit: Also, I don't think I've EVER seen a non-commercial building in Canada that has bars on the windows.
Reply
starile
| 19
Canada must be absolutely wonderful for Jehova's witnesses and door-to-door salesmen.
Reply
sanecatlady
| 13
Me too. I think my parents are crazy because they have a security system but never lock their door and when I come visit I have to not lock it out of habit or they flip out. It's not being paranoid, it's being smart!