By FML - 16/7/2019 05:18 Relatable. I agree, your life sucks 575 You deserved it 61 0 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By anonymous - 29/7/2012 13:34 - Australia - Queanbeyan Today, my OCD boyfriend stopped mid-way through sex just to crack all ten of his knuckles after accidentally cracking one. FML I agree, your life sucks 32278 You deserved it 4844 178 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By yoked - 18/12/2009 03:48 - United States Today, while lying in bed with my wife, I asked her if she still loved me. Her reply "Sometimes". This I know is true because she instantly rolled over and farted on my leg. FML I agree, your life sucks 33067 You deserved it 4595 84 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By BlueBallMcGee - 11/5/2009 12:08 - United States Today, I came home from working twelve hours straight. Feeling rather frisky, I attempted to seduce my wife upon arriving home. She said that sleep was better than sex and went directly to bed. It was only 6:30 PM. FML I agree, your life sucks 64540 You deserved it 6980 127 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 21/1/2012 20:59 - Canada Today, I accidentally dropped my phone while I was crossing the road. Luckily, it survived the fall. Not so luckily, an oncoming bus steamrolled it into oblivion. FML I agree, your life sucks 26114 You deserved it 3838 123 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By tessisue - 4/1/2016 11:18 - Germany Today, I visited the hospital with my boyfriend to have an injury checked. When the doctor removed the band-aid, my boyfriend started screaming and passed out. I had to get him out of the room using a wheelchair. The "injury" is a cut in his finger. FML I agree, your life sucks 21733 You deserved it 2192 91 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 3/11/2010 18:10 - United Kingdom Today, my mum and I decided to go on a hike. Beforehand we left my car at the end of the trail and took my mums car to the beginning. After 4 hours we arrived at my car. I had left my keys in mums car. It was a long walk back. FML I agree, your life sucks 9335 You deserved it 29149 161 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By stickyface - 24/10/2010 05:18 - Canada Today, I decided to be adventurous and give my boyfriend head in the downstairs tv room. Just as he was about to cum I heard someone walking towards the door. I took my mouth off to get up and lock the door just as he came. Didn't make it to the door but my dad saw something he will never forget. FML I agree, your life sucks 13910 You deserved it 41318 179 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By nobodywasthere - 29/11/2017 01:30 Today, I explained to my teacher that I wasn't at school yesterday due to three doctor appointments for my moderate epilepsy. Yesterday was senior skip day. She gave me detention for lying. FML I agree, your life sucks 4113 You deserved it 328 16 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By shugberry - 1/9/2019 12:01 - United Kingdom - London Today, I took my mum on the London Underground. We were standing on the platform, when she suddenly bought up a load of phlegm in her mouth. Instead of trying to find a bin, she just full on spat out the biggest green pile on the floor next to people. FML I agree, your life sucks 1657 You deserved it 111 6 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 11/8/2011 05:53 - Mexico Today, since I'm too ashamed to go buy a proper sex toy, I used an old Star Wars toy sword instead. FML I agree, your life sucks 14065 You deserved it 56610 460 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 10/8/2014 18:12 - United Kingdom - Ilminster Today, I babysat a 6-year-old boy for the first time. When I said it was his bedtime, he just screamed "Eat a dick!" at me. I was so shocked, all I could do was leave him be. When his parents returned, I had to make up an excuse for why he was still awake and watching TV, to save my pride. FML I agree, your life sucks 38187 You deserved it 9944 91 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anon - 23/5/2016 10:49 - United States - Lansing Today, I found out my husband has been catfishing my sixteen year-old brother for over a year. FML I agree, your life sucks 16060 You deserved it 1238 109 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By prevostsrocklike - 11/5/2009 12:38 - United States Today, I gave my wife a cat. The first thing it did when it got out of the box was scratch the sh*t out of my leg. Next, it ran up to my wife and purred. She said, "Good cat." FML I agree, your life sucks 58868 You deserved it 10503 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Brian - 16/7/2011 19:19 - United States Today, after working all day and putting in hours of overtime, I realized I never clocked in. FML I agree, your life sucks 37941 You deserved it 18784 179 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By jlong9071 - 9/11/2014 03:38 - United States - Charlotte Today, I learned that when you're talking about your girlfriend's 6'4", 250 lb dad in a negative way, you should really make sure he isn't around first. FML I agree, your life sucks 19841 You deserved it 39809 66 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Godwhy - 17/9/2018 14:00 Today, I found out my boyfriend of 7 years has been cheating on me with my friend's 18-year-old sister, took her on the vacation we planned, and will be starting with my company next week. FML I agree, your life sucks 3501 You deserved it 204 12 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Mishlette - 23/1/2015 13:27 - United Kingdom - Derby Today, I started at my new job. Turns out my boss is a complete douchebag. He spent most of the day looking over our shoulders and making cuntish comments about our work, then called a guy a piece of shit for farting and forced him to spray disinfectant on his chair. FML I agree, your life sucks 31750 You deserved it 2731 52 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 9/5/2015 18:50 - United States - Humble Today, on my first driving lesson, I crashed my instructor's car. I didn't even make it out of the parking lot. FML I agree, your life sucks 26139 You deserved it 11027 77 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 7/2/2012 02:08 - United States Today, I made a Sim of myself and had her work out until she was completely fit, then got her a job and a husband. Meanwhile, I sat at my desk, fat, single and jobless. FML I agree, your life sucks 17041 You deserved it 42037 167 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By disappointmentafter4years - 12/4/2016 19:31 - United States - Philadelphia Today, after 4 years of staring each other down at the bar, we both finally made a move and ended up at his apartment. After 45 mins of unsuccessfully getting anywhere, I left, to walk home in a hail storm. FML I agree, your life sucks 21213 You deserved it 3685 51 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 16/6/2014 15:24 - Germany Today, I was trying on bikinis at a local store. When I put my pants back on, my foot got stuck, I tripped and fell through the curtain of the fitting room, topless. FML I agree, your life sucks 61972 You deserved it 8757 113 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By :| - 26/9/2015 04:10 - New Zealand - Nelson Today, my 6-year-old daughter touched a tray I'd just pulled out of the oven. I quickly swatted her hand away, but then noticed she wasn't hurt or burned at all. I then gingerly touched the tray and got scalded. My daughter giggled maniacally as I screamed. To be honest, I'm now terrified of her. FML I agree, your life sucks 29588 You deserved it 4227 104 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 1/11/2010 04:09 - United States Today, it was my big sister's birthday, and I was told the iPod I ordered her online was not coming due to a mix up. I drove to three different electronic stores before I found the one she wanted. After spending forever in traffic, I came home to find a package on my doorstep. It was her iPod. FML I agree, your life sucks 31202 You deserved it 4008 85 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 26/8/2014 18:11 - Latvia - Riga Today, my boss asked me if I could work this weekend, doing the work of 2 people, for almost no extra pay. I had a weekend out with my kids planned, so I said I couldn't. My boss called it a shitty excuse, yet gave a free pass to a guy who claimed he had a "phobia of working on weekends". FML I agree, your life sucks 41553 You deserved it 2673 48 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ouch - 3/3/2009 23:08 - United States Today, a guy who I've been on five dates with called me for the first time in 2 weeks. The first thing I said was, "Don't expect me to go out with you again after going AWOL on me." Then he told me his mom died. FML I agree, your life sucks 17785 You deserved it 69924 86 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By olalala2382 - 2/4/2009 05:09 - United States Today, as I worked the drive-through at Wendy's, the hottest girl from my math class pulled up to the window. As I handed her the drink, I asked her what she thought of our math test today. She screamed "How did you know I had a math test, you creep!", threw the drink at me, and drove off. FML I agree, your life sucks 91886 You deserved it 7202 219 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 19/10/2018 14:00 Today, I was in the middle of a wank when my home's back door, which is always locked, suddenly opened and someone walked in. I’m not sure who was more surprised: me or the new maintenance guy who saw me wanking. FML I agree, your life sucks 3178 You deserved it 600 13 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By kelizabeth - 5/8/2009 18:17 - United States Today, I went with my fiancé to meet his parents. He was really sweet the whole way there, and once we got there he introduced me as 'the girl I'm going to marry'. His parents took one look at me and said, "Are you sure?" I laughed, because I thought they were joking. They weren't. FML I agree, your life sucks 50952 You deserved it 3179 86 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Lindso1 - 6/7/2018 01:30 Today, I came home to find my home had been broken into. Nothing was taken, but all the drains were plugged and the water left blasting on high, with a note that said “enjoy the mess”. FML I agree, your life sucks 4078 You deserved it 225 22 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By MakeDonaldDrumpfAgain - 30/3/2016 05:24 - Canada - Guelph Today, I discovered that my Dad's family very much supports Donald Trump. They tried to convince me to support his campaign by donating money. We're not even American. FML I agree, your life sucks 21897 You deserved it 2297 20 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 19/9/2014 08:58 - Belgium Today, in a rush to get out of my house to go to a doctor's appointment, I closed the door behind me without having my house or car keys on me. Sadly, it took me less than a minute to break into my own house. FML I agree, your life sucks 34965 You deserved it 5994 66 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By heatherjo - 2/11/2011 04:49 - United States Today, my fiancé decided he wants to buy an engagement ring for his mother, so that she doesn't feel left out. FML I agree, your life sucks 44324 You deserved it 3907 237 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Elizabeth - 11/12/2008 05:13 - France Today, a girl in my class turned around and said, "Wow, you've got your photo on a rubber! That's amazing!" The rubber was designed to look like a £10 note, and the picture was of the Queen of England. FML I agree, your life sucks 22950 You deserved it 2442 88 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Jessey - 18/6/2009 13:05 - United Kingdom Today, we were having a school prize giving. I heard my name called and I walked up to the stage waving and smiling, feeling rather proud of myself. I stood by the microphone and started my acceptance speech, only to be tapped on the shoulder by the girl they actually called up. FML I agree, your life sucks 23722 You deserved it 47670 113 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 16/1/2011 17:38 - United States Today, I discovered that I've lost thirty pounds since having my second child. However, I still weigh just as much as I did when I was full-term with my first child. FML I agree, your life sucks 26930 You deserved it 8563 58 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By WheatiesMan - 15/6/2016 10:52 Today, I'm on a class trip to Washington DC. Last night, my roommate took a shower, and I decided that I would take one in the morning. This morning, I found out after I got out of the shower that my roommate used one towel for drying himself, and the other for a mat. He didn't hang either of them up. FML I agree, your life sucks 12840 You deserved it 1257 55 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By drunkenloser - 20/9/2013 07:22 - United States Today, my alcoholism reached a new low when I found myself sitting on the toilet drinking a bottle of wine. FML I agree, your life sucks 23098 You deserved it 38368 77 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By pleasekillme - 19/4/2013 11:44 - United Kingdom - Brighton Today, it has been over 3 months since my housemates ended their 1 month long relationship. He's still creepily obsessed with her. He picked the bathroom lock when I was in the shower and tried to get in, and then called me a "fucking c*nt" when he realised it was me in there, not her. FML I agree, your life sucks 56957 You deserved it 4436 142 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 17/10/2015 12:29 - Australia - Surry Hills Today, I finally found out why my new co-worker has been shooting me dirty looks, being rude to me, and generally trying to avoid me. It's because I have blonde hair and blue eyes, and she thinks people like me are Nazis. FML I agree, your life sucks 27790 You deserved it 1719 87 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Annoyed - 28/10/2011 20:25 - United States Today, my boyfriend's mother told me she bought the same perfume that my boyfriend got me for Christmas last year. He loves that perfume. Now, whenever he smells me, he's going to think of his mom. FML I agree, your life sucks 28276 You deserved it 2809 104 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
Today, I had too much to eat at dinner. I had to cut sexy time with my husband short because I couldn't do it. I feel bad because it's his birthday today... I agree, your life sucks 611 You deserved it 245 4 Comments
Today, while I was working in a department store, two 15-year-old kids started having sex in a changing room. When I found them, the boy pulled out and... I agree, your life sucks 1154 You deserved it 75 1 Comments
