(Photos) Some dates are duds. Ending up stuck between 2 windows after taking a dump… that's FML!
There's no way you're getting a 10/10 in crap throwing in 2024…
An amateur gymnast in Bristol (UK) was in the middle of a first date with Liam Smith when a shitty FML occured. Yes, we used the "shitty" pun that regularly appears in the comments. This was a shitty situation. We did it again.
The call of nature
When you're about to move on to serious business, also known as business time, you need to be void of all needs in the bathroom area. When you're at the other person's place, you make your excuses and empty your bowels into their toilet, especially if a "number 2" is required. No one likes to be shat upon during sex (except some weird people on the internet). The young lady in question made her way to the bathroom and did her duty, but Liam hadn't warned her that his toilet's flushing power was slightly under par. Her dumped dump wouldn't flush. Panic ensues.
WHAT DO I DO NOW?!
According to our friends at the BBC, she did what any of us would've done: she grabbed her piece of poopy poo and threw it out of the window. The problem with her clever plan is that Liam's apartment was fitted with a second, sealed window. The package dropped between the two glass panels, like an exhibit in a weird-ass museum.
(Poop under glass, 2017)
Having told Liam about her "situation", she then thought it would be a great idea to go head-first between the windows to retrive the flying piece of dung, but even being a supple gymnast couldn't stop her from getting stuck.
(Help, I need somebody…)
"Is that the fire brigade? I've got a woman here stuck between my windows…"
Liam Smith had to admit that professional help was required. He called his local fire brigade, who turned up, had a bit of a laugh, then got to work. They not only dismantled the window, they destroyed it.
"I'm not complaining, they did what they had to do," said Liam. "Problem is, I've been quoted north of £300 to replace the window and as a postgraduate student, that is a significant chunk of my monthly budget."
(The fire brigade in action. Less sexy than on TV)
Crowdfund my window, please!
Liam then launched an appeal on GoFundMe, with a target of £200, reaching an amazing total of a £1200 after it was posted on the University of Bristol website. The young lady obviously wants to remain anonymous, but together they've split the extra cash for two charities, one which supports fire brigades, the other which helps install and maintain flushable toilets in developing countries.
(Their GoFundMe as it is)
Where is the love?
"We had a lovely night on the second date but it's too early to say if she's the one. But we got on very very well and she's a lovely girl," said Liam. "And we've already got the most difficult stuff out of the way first."
What better way for love to bloom via a piece of shit thrown at a closed window? Ah, bless.
Read the original BBC article, containing an interview with Liam Smith by clicking here.