Parents Of Twitter Are Renaming Their Kids After The Reasons They Were Born And It’s Ridiculously Funny

After one woman’s tweet about her honest kids’ names went viral, parents on Twitter chimed in to name their own kids and the thread is an absolute treasure trove, as first resported by Scary Mommy.
If we named kids after the reason we had them it’d be like, “Hey Marital Problems stop hitting Broken Condom I’m trying to put Hennessy down for a nap.”
— Honest Toddler’s Mom (@HonestToddler) November 22, 2017
I’ll own up to the cliche of being a “Valentine’s Day” baby. The thought itself is pretty cringey, but I’d take that over being a “Hennessey” baby any day!
These parents are showing that most of the time, their kids really are accidents, but the circumstances leading up to those accidents are surprisingly hilarious.
1. The next generation's most popular name.
How many Netflix and Chill's would be born by 2020 I wonder ?
— Chanty (@CodeName_Petty) 22 novembre 2017
2. Mimosas are dangerous...
Mine would be named "taco truck fight" and "mommy's birthday mimosas"
— Dominique Matti (@mominiquematti) 22 novembre 2017
3. Named after a relic. Classy.
My kids are older so: Blockbuster New Release Wall, and The Military's Gonna Pay for this one
— Tom McCarthy (@jrpwrrngr01) 22 novembre 2017
4. "He went to Jared"
My beautiful girls, 7yo He Bought Me Diamonds, and 5yo Anniversary Champagne
— Elizabeth Estes (@eestes30) 22 novembre 2017
5. Sharing is caring.
That’s it, Faulty Military Birth Control...if you can’t respect Gotta Give The Oldest A Sibling’s toys you can’t play with them anymore. — Brianna Turner (@BriannaTurner32) November 22, 2017
6. Oh, how we underestimated parenthood.
A Second Will Keep the First Occupied would play with Let's Be Parents Cause It'll Be Fun! — Sarah Davies (@francesthoughts) November 22, 2017
7. Well you sound fun, mom.
I would be shouting “Hey Grey Goose and Beyonce, stop fighting” all day — Love.Music.Mommy. (@lovemusicmommy) November 22, 2017
8. I ain't saying she a gold digger.
My beautiful girls, 7yo He Bought Me Diamonds, and 5yo Anniversary Champagne — Elizabeth Estes (@eestes30) November 22, 2017
9. BFF
Hey, Best Friend's Wedding, please stop teasing Best Friend's Wedding Needs a Best Friend. — Whit Thompson (@whit_thompson) November 22, 2017
10. What a trip.
"mushrooms in Maine" — Ya Mama (@clumsyjeweler) November 22, 2017
11. Screw the odds!
Our boys (6 and 4) are named 'Holy Shit IVF Worked' and 'Holy Shit IVF Worked Again'.
People get them mixed up a lot. — I saw Mommy colluding with Santa Claus. (@stateofthehand) November 22, 2017
12. You've got to read the side effect warnings.
"Happy First Anniversary, let Efficacy of the Pill is Reduced by the Use of Antibiotics have a turn on the Xbox." — Good Dog, Blue. ? (@sasimmons) November 22, 2017
13. Age ain't nothing but a number.
"hey, DesperateForaBaby, keep WowThatWasEasierThanIThought away from Surpriseat43" — Alexandra Rosas (@GDRPempress) November 22, 2017
14. These children are clearly a product of miseducation.
Hey Just The Tip stop teasing Condom Slipped Off After, I want you to set a good example for Didn't Study Fertility Awareness Method Long Enough — Vulnerability Hangover™ (@SewSoDef) November 22, 2017
15. Preparing for number 3.
???? Hey, Too Much Tequila, I need you to babysit The Doctor Said I Would Never Get Pregnant Again while I go to the liquor store. — Jess (@Big_Neffy) November 22, 2017