Here Are The 16 Funniest Tweets From This Week!
1. Happy first week back at school everyone!
How’s y’all first day going.. pic.twitter.com/i925jXahRB— Ebony (@ebonyrobinson10) August 22, 2018
2. This is a fact.
girls be like "can you get my lip gloss from my purse? just reach in & head left, take a right at the wallet then turn left til you pass 3 nutrigrain bars & take your next right then head straight & it should be there. if you've hit the 2007 target receipts you've gone too far"— jake (@squidslippers) August 24, 2018
3. Ohhhh, ah ohhhh
me when im 30 with no kids— 💀\o/💀 (@zfedraws) August 24, 2018
Doctor: ur biological clock is ticking
me: tik tok on the clock but th party dont stop no
4. Or, hitting on girls.
My dog just posts up like he’s in the club judging ppl pic.twitter.com/7dECkhW7qY— BV (@bvbillionaire) August 23, 2018
5. Many dogs made it on this week's tweet list
My cat was drinking Otis’ water and he looked up at me like he was in an episode of The Office lmao pic.twitter.com/hYqzoNKMiW— Sam (@samanthughhh) August 26, 2018
6. Like... many, many.
me when i wake up vs. when i’m finally ready to go out pic.twitter.com/wh0WMHuFXr— tina le (@t1nale) August 26, 2018
7. Lol, amiright? UP TOP!
therapist: you have PTSD— Abby (@yungmasala_) August 27, 2018
me: hell yeah I have PTSD: Proficient Talent for Sucking DICK lmao
therapist: maybe we can talk about your use of humor as an unhealthy coping mechanism for the trauma you’ve experienced
me: Sheryl, I don’t think you understand how clever that joke was
8. Cowabunga dude
100 level course prof: Attendance is mandatory, no phones allowed, 12 hours of homework/week, also we have 5 exams and one is in 9 days— Lindsay (@plantbboi) August 27, 2018
500 level course prof: I illegally downloaded the texbook, I'll send you the link. text me if you need anything. Do you guys wanna go kayaking?
9. Here's another dog but this time you cry
facebook really out here making me sob. pic.twitter.com/sJS4fkx6Oa— sam ⚢ (@sxmwich) August 25, 2018
10. You're terrible if you laugh
me: mental health isnt a joke— dylan (@sometimesdyl) August 23, 2018
also me 1000 times a day: im gonna fucking shoot myself straight in the fucking eyeball
11. Re: The ASOS crop top debate
All clothing is unisex if you stop being a little bitch about it— Saint Sims (@SimsJoseph) August 23, 2018
12. LIVE - LAUGH- LOVE
me:— bailie (@xbaiIie) August 26, 2018
white woman’s kitchen:
13. Terror throwback
y’all remember when we had a clown problem ?!?!? LMFAO what the actual fuck was that— Z (@zthunda) August 26, 2018
14. But, what if tho.
My 5 year old son just asked “what if we put a slice of turkey in the DVD player and it played a movie about the turkey’s whole life” and none of the parenting books I’ve read have prepared me for this question.— Octopus/Caveman (@OctopusCaveman) August 26, 2018
15. This is the final dog for today's tweet list but he is very worth it
i felt like sharing this video of my dog straight chillin pic.twitter.com/7PbHb5vExW— gustavo📌 (@capnsaveahood) August 25, 2018
16. Okay, queen.
SOMEONE SAID “WAIT START AGAIN I WASNT RECORDING” AND SHE DID LMAOOOOOO pic.twitter.com/IEAhCM2YzX— meliss (@majestcbitch) August 26, 2018