- FML

By FML Approved

I agree, your life sucks

1603

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176

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There's no helping some people

British Broadcasting Corporation

Near the knuckle

By j_Lauren - United States

Today, my mom had the option of choosing anywhere in the world where we could go on vacation. We live in the USA and she chose to fly to Texas, rent an RV, and drive to Florida. Anywhere in the world. FML

I agree, your life sucks

37490

You deserved it

3295

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By XavierLing

Today, my thigh was itchy, so I went into a bathroom stall to scratch it. I, for some reason, moaned out loud while doing it. After that, the men's bathroom went completely silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1019

You deserved it

695

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By Anonymous - Australia

Today, my husband blew all the candles on his birthday cake while I was taking a photo in front of him. I will probably never use cocoa powder to decorate a birthday cake anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10873

You deserved it

39351

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By Intheway - United States

Today, the guy I've been dating tells me that I need to stop hanging on him in public because it's ruining his game with other girls. FML

I agree, your life sucks

51154

You deserved it

6048

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By onlyslightly - United States

Today, my cat peed on my bra. I didn't realize this until after I arrived at work for my 12-hour shift. Now I'm trying to wash my bra out in the sink and stuff paper towels down it to soak up the moisture. Only 10 more hours to go, and the smell of cat pee is still lingering. FML

I agree, your life sucks

25766

You deserved it

4787

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By woahheylex - United States

Today, after ordering pizza, I heard some strange noises coming from my basement so I called the cops. The pizza came fifteen minutes before the cops. FML

I agree, your life sucks

36569

You deserved it

5327

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By Ribbed for Her Disaster - United Kingdom - Orpington

Today, I was trying out my first vibrator. Soon enough, my 12-year-old sister opened my door, walked in, and saw me naked from the waist down. She laughed, called me a virgin, and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks

58284

You deserved it

19377

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By Anonymous

Today, I traveled to my hometown for a funeral. I'm staying with my family in the house I grew up in. My dad told me they'd "completely renovated" the house. There's still only one bathroom for the seven of us and I'm sleeping on the floor for the entire two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4020

You deserved it

392

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By Don'tjudgeabook

Today, a man reminded me five times how much of a "nice guy" he was during our first conversation, saying also that I seem the sort to date the "bad guys" because I looked sweet and innocent. Then, without waiting for me to say something, he sighed and walked away, muttering that he always finished last. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4694

You deserved it

333

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By stabbed with kindness - Russian Federation - Elektrostal

Today, on the way home, a guy yelled "Hey, YOU!" from behind me, so I walked faster. He ran up to me, shouting, "I said stop, asshole!" I almost pissed myself in fear, thinking I was being mugged. Turns out I'd left my wallet at the grocery store, and he was just trying to return it. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22460

You deserved it

45088

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By joe - United States

Today, I was in the checkout line at Foodmax around 11:30pm. Three girls behind me were buying Tequila, salt and some limes. I was buying frozen pizza and some toilet paper. They were going to an awesome party. I was going home to eat pizza by myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks

32704

You deserved it

8303

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By kappu

Today, I got home to find my house trashed, my TV, PlayStation, and laptop smashed, all my clothes burning in the backyard, and all my food gone. Turns out my girlfriend did this after going through my phone and finding a contact named "Kristi". Kristi is my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks

5657

You deserved it

446

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By ItWasHotAsBalls

Today, my mom was out of the house, so I decided to make her a gift. I went into the garage for supplies and somehow ended up locking myself in for the next 2 hours. Not only that, but I cut my hand with the rusty paperclip I used to try to pick the lock. FML

I agree, your life sucks

7464

You deserved it

1603

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By al - Canada - Cambridge

Today, I had to admit that I hate the wedding dress that I've designed. My wedding is in a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks

10045

You deserved it

30471

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By calli - United Kingdom

Today, I was working at the Soup Kitchen handing out special christmas dinners to the homeless. At the end of the day I collected my things and went home. It was only then I discovered that my wallet, phone, pager and (for some reason) my glasses has been stolen. FML

I agree, your life sucks

31374

You deserved it

4588

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By Failure

Today, despite having glowing recommendations, stellar grades, and an impressive resumé, I was rejected by all 15 colleges that I applied to. No explanation or reasons have been given, and it's too late to apply to any more. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9743

You deserved it

918

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By Anonymous - United States

Conspiracy.

Today, immediately after placing my order and paying for my meal, the Chinese takeout place lost all power. FML

I agree, your life sucks

5540

You deserved it

425

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By Chessmomma3

Today, my 18-month-old found our "naughty drawer." I found her carrying a "toy" all over the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1305

You deserved it

905

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By bloody_hell - United States - Elkhart

Today, I was faced with the inevitable horrible circumstances which lead me to put in a tampon on a moving city bus. FML

I agree, your life sucks

34506

You deserved it

5211

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By Flip - France

Today, to avoid looking like a loser in front of his friends who all have girlfriends, my brother made up a perfect relationship. He asked me to give him a hickey in exchange for 50 euros. Our parents walked in on us. FML

I agree, your life sucks

16757

You deserved it

58290

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By somanybirds - United States - Jacksonville

Today, while using a doorless restroom at the beach, a pack of seagulls rushed into my stall, followed by a group of kids chasing them. I guess the noise from tearing open a pad sounded enough like a bag of chips for them to think there was food. FML

I agree, your life sucks

4694

You deserved it

307

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By cain001 - United States

Today, my boss and I were stacking boxes in the back room of the store. One of the boxes fell and hit me in the face, causing me to lose my glasses. My boss stepped on my glasses as she ran to check the box for broken merchandise, which I then had to pay for. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29955

You deserved it

2523

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By Anonymous - United States - White Plains

Today, my husband asked our tax professional if we could file my profession as "Expert Dream Murderer." I'm a guidance counselor. FML

I agree, your life sucks

38650

You deserved it

5278

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By no snow day - United States - Round Lake

Today, like every day, I had to walk to my bus stop. The only difference today is there was snow and ice over everything. Not only did I slip and fall, soaking both myself and the contents of my bag, the bus driver saw me there at the bus stop and drove straight past. FML

I agree, your life sucks

47107

You deserved it

4008

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By Loose Goose

Today, I went on a coffee date. It turned out to be a mistake - not because he was bad, but because I forgot how much coffee upsets my stomach. Yup, it makes me need to poop, and I did. In my jeans. As he drove me home. Not quite the "run" of fun we’d planned. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2629

You deserved it

623

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By demotivator - Romania - Timisoara

Today, I finally got off my lazy ass and start studying for my upcoming exam. It was going pretty well, until my classmate called and after I proudly told him about my sudden motivation, the only thing he had to say was, "You got the date wrong, the exam was on thursday." FML

I agree, your life sucks

23063

You deserved it

27452

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By I have wood - United States - Stephenville

Today, my room mate told all of our mutual friends that he had walked in on me doing woodwork in my room. They all thought he meant he had caught me rubbing one out. I'm actually building a guitar. FML

I agree, your life sucks

52216

You deserved it

3653

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By Drewski - United States - Cincinnati

Today, I am recovering from my second back surgery. I survived four years in the Army with one combat tour without major injury, only to destroy my back the day after discharge by lifting my mother-in-law's suitcase into the trunk of her car. FML

I agree, your life sucks

9121

You deserved it

602

Favorite

My long-distance partner came to visit me for the weekend. When he arrived he seemed moody and tired, and refused any kind of physical contact. Upset, I asked him what was wrong. Turns out he's mad for coming to see me because I've put on weight, making the trip a waste of his time. FML

I agree, your life sucks

3510

You deserved it

446

Favorite

By Girl-with-the-glasses - Australia - Sydney

Today, I found out about my old school's class reunion, which I wasn't invited to. Everyone has my number and e-mail address. They just "forgot" to tell me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

24755

You deserved it

2833

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By hunnybaby0319 - United States

Today, I went to pick up my car from where I parked it last night. I walked over to my parking spot only to find a vegetable stand there in its place. Apparently, that's the location of the Saturday Market and they had my car towed. FML

I agree, your life sucks

12840

You deserved it

25508

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By Anonymous - United States

Today, my fiancé has been jumping out of closets and from around corners with a video camera, trying to catch me naked. He says he wants to post a video online so his old high school friends can "rate" me. I'm now afraid to get intimate, shower, or even change my clothes in my own home. FML

I agree, your life sucks

44965

You deserved it

5131

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By BambooLove - United States

Today, my boyfriend woke up wheezing terribly, aching, and sneezing. He's allergic to cats. I have 2 and they are my babies. He gave me an ultimatum, him or the cats. I haven't figured out how I'm going to tell him that I choose the cats. FML

I agree, your life sucks

22966

You deserved it

65760

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By Jacqueline H'ghar - New Zealand

Today, I missed my bus to the doctor's office for my scheduled pap test. I was so desperate, I called my deadbeat mom to ask for a ride. She said "Virgins don't need pap tests", laughed, then hung up on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks

15743

You deserved it

1110

Favorite

By Anonymous - 24/4/2020 20:00

And today on Maury…

Today, I was driving my best friend home when he admitted to being gay. I was glad he could trust me with a secret like this. Until he admitted to having sex with my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2431

You deserved it

179

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By christine brown - United States

Today, I got suspended for bringing a "hazardous weapon" to school. They were earrings. FML

I agree, your life sucks

35618

You deserved it

3697

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By bl3ur0z3

Today, I learned that my new apartment complex does not allow "altercations in community areas". This includes pulling my child out of the pool and reprimanding him for holding his cousin under water. I can't parent outside my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks

2934

You deserved it

230

Favorite

By Chansus10 - United States - Greendale

Today, my boss drove past me while I was walking to work, and splashing mud over my uniform. When I got to work, he criticized me for showing up in unpresentable condition. FML

I agree, your life sucks

40426

You deserved it

2934

Favorite

By chap - 11/7/2020 02:01

Monetize your shit life

Today, I was in an Uber with a friend I hadn't seen in 7 years. I was just catching her up on my daily life when my Uber driver decided to chime into our conversation and kindly inform me that: "[I] should be a stand-up comedian." He literally thought my life was a joke. FML

I agree, your life sucks

1378

You deserved it

188

Favorite

By BoogieCandy. - Canada

Today, at work, I was standing at the till helping an attractive man. I have a cold and could feel the snot bubbling up. He orders and we flirt for a bit. Just as I'm about to hand him his product, I sneeze quite loudly and forcefully all over his face. Guess I won't be getting that number. FML

I agree, your life sucks

29338

You deserved it

8510

Favorite

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Top comments

By Talented73 | 54

#7536830 - Saturday 2 September 2017 19:48

I hope no proctologist ever gets the same idea!

By Glowworm56 | 25

#7536913 - Sunday 3 September 2017 2:45

This isn't a fail, it's a win! The tooth chairs are awesome.

COMMENTS

By Talented73 | 54

#7536830 - Saturday 2 September 2017 19:48

I hope no proctologist ever gets the same idea!

By jfsiv | 17

#7536842 - Saturday 2 September 2017 20:49

Speak for yourself!

By Glowworm56 | 25

#7536913 - Sunday 3 September 2017 2:45

This isn't a fail, it's a win! The tooth chairs are awesome.

By ThrottleJockey | 34

#7537066 - Sunday 3 September 2017 16:36

Tooth be told, I think it's brilliant!

By The Best Retainer | 1

#7537920 - Wednesday 6 September 2017 4:02

This is a pretty great idea! Not for all practices, but a pretty great one.