By FML Approved - France - Paris I agree, your life sucks 1179 You deserved it 188 0 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Out of Shape - Egypt Today, I decided to start exercising. I almost passed out five minutes into the warm up, and couldn't even stand in the shower afterwards. I'm only 21. FML I agree, your life sucks 14874 You deserved it 35488 152 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By awkward O_o - United States - Saint Paul Today, I found out that my roommate has a masturbation problem; the problem is that he does it in my bed. FML I agree, your life sucks 65614 You deserved it 4897 96 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By pixiebubz - Australia Today, I told my boyfriend I had an appointment for laser hair removal. He responded by making "pew pew" noises and pretending to shoot my underarms. He's 28. FML I agree, your life sucks 15871 You deserved it 29311 113 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Donewithit - United States - San Francisco Today, my class was called to the auditorium. We were told that some asshat proctor took a picture of our testing room during out test and posted it on Facebook. Someone noticed that according to the rules, we were sitting too close to each other, so now we have to retake the whole test. FML I agree, your life sucks 30553 You deserved it 2281 41 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I asked my friends what NNAS was code for. They have been using this for about a month. After bothering one of them for a few hours, he finally told me. NNAS stands for Nataly Needs A Shower. I'm Nataly. FML I agree, your life sucks 17464 You deserved it 52104 163 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By pimpdaddyX - Malaysia - Shah Alam Today, trying to be smooth, I slipped the girl I like a piece of paper with my phone number written on it. A while later, she slipped it back to me and left the room. FML I agree, your life sucks 12126 You deserved it 19855 106 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Grand Ledge Today, while in a hospital waiting room, a man started talking to me. After a few minutes, he asked me what I did for a living, and I said I'm a stay-at-home mom. He looked me up and down and said, "Huh. No life ambitions, huh?" FML I agree, your life sucks 35356 You deserved it 7557 61 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By j_Lauren - United States Today, my mom had the option of choosing anywhere in the world where we could go on vacation. We live in the USA and she chose to fly to Texas, rent an RV, and drive to Florida. Anywhere in the world. FML I agree, your life sucks 37492 You deserved it 3295 138 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By kimm1993 - United States - Chicago Today, I showed the kids I was babysitting a picture of my daughter, and the little girl asked, "You have a baby in your belly?" I said, "No, she's not in my belly anymore," and the little girl replied, "But it's BIG," and patted my stomach. FML I agree, your life sucks 48612 You deserved it 8426 73 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By btchzloveit - United States Today, after 4 months of no family contact while deployed in the military, I receive an email from my mother. Attached was a picture of a toilet full of green shit, with a message from my mom saying, "Seen neon poo before? Thought I would share!" FML I agree, your life sucks 31172 You deserved it 2384 143 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Australia Today, my grandpa died. I decided to call my grandma to make sure she was going to be fine. After talking over the phone for 30 minutes or so, I told her goodbye and said, out of habit: "Say hi to grandpa for me". FML I agree, your life sucks 51621 You deserved it 25830 113 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By mulligan - United States Today, I told my boyfriend I'll be moving to a different state in a few months for a new job. He now refers to me as his "girlfriend for now". FML I agree, your life sucks 12784 You deserved it 2793 57 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By riiiight - United States - Warren Today, I went on a blind date. The first thing the guy did was ask if I knew what it felt like to have spiders crawl out of my vagina. FML I agree, your life sucks 55279 You deserved it 5835 141 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By freezingggg - Reserved Today, like always, my parents are such tightwads that they refused to turn the heating system on, despite the ball-freezing temperatures. I was so cold, I had to resort to warming my hands up over the toaster. FML I agree, your life sucks 29096 You deserved it 3684 170 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By sippinsoup22 - United States - Houston Today, my cat was being surprisingly loving towards me. Normally she ignores me so I obviously found this rather odd. She kept meowing so I assumed she was hungry. As I was getting up to feed her, she stood up and pooped all over me, my bed and phone, then turned away and ran. FML I agree, your life sucks 19668 You deserved it 2438 81 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By dynah114 - Israel - Petah Tiqva Today, at my cousin's birthday party, my grandma took me to one side, slipped me a pad, and started ranting that tampons "steal your virginity" and that I should never use them. Well, okay then. FML I agree, your life sucks 32220 You deserved it 2458 104 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By baugy - United States - Orlando Today, while outside, a bug flew up my nose. After I told my family and friends about a faint vibrating in my upper nostril, they all convinced me I was paranoid. That was until that night when I blew my nose and there was the bug in my tissue. Its leg was still twitching. FML I agree, your life sucks 31050 You deserved it 2496 119 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Australia - Brisbane Bad women's anatomy Today, I had to explain to my boyfriend that me switching to "super" sized tampons does not mean I've been having sex with other men with bigger penises, and that my vagina hasn't been "stretched bigger". FML I agree, your life sucks 37070 You deserved it 3544 137 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I met a man at the bar, and he asked me to go home with him. The problem? He's 80. I'm 29. The bigger problem? I considered it. It's been that long. FML I agree, your life sucks 30750 You deserved it 17785 132 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By secret dancer - Sweden Today, I was bored and all alone while cleaning at work. This led me to start passionately doing a ballet dance in the empty corridor. I promptly stopped as I remembered the surveillance cameras. FML I agree, your life sucks 25381 You deserved it 11315 129 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FANZZY - United States - Brooklyn Today, I learned that when someone is choking you don't do the "hymen maneuver", you do the "heimlich maneuver". I was corrected by my girlfriend's parents. FML I agree, your life sucks 35180 You deserved it 16210 56 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By TayTay - United States Today, my boyfriend and I went to a Taylor Swift concert. At the concert they put up a sign that said "Scream if you love country boys." My boyfriend took one look at it and started screaming. FML I agree, your life sucks 58829 You deserved it 12405 249 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Rockville Centre Today, I had to go to the hospital to get blood taken. The nurse mentioned how pronounced and easy to see my veins are. I guess that explains why she missed five times in a row. I'm surprised my arm doesn't look like a heroin addict's right now. FML I agree, your life sucks 41328 You deserved it 3073 80 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By who knows - United States - Mankato Tell me the reason Today, someone took my phone away. Why? Because I was texting my ex-boyfriend who cheated on me with one of my friends. FML I agree, your life sucks 546 You deserved it 3229 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United Kingdom Today, my parents hassled me for wanting to get my tongue pierced, saying it was filthy, unprofessional, and degrading. About an hour later, my sister let slip that my nipple is pierced. FML I agree, your life sucks 18397 You deserved it 36591 224 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Embarrassed Today, my boyfriend finally got me to orgasm, for the first time in my life, after trying for months. He started laughing when I climaxed. I asked why. Apparently I look like an Down's Syndrome child when I climax. FML I agree, your life sucks 42224 You deserved it 6685 206 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By lanikai610 - United States Today, there was no toilet paper left, so I asked my grandmother if I could use her Kleenex tissues. I found out too late that they were Vicks vapor rub tissues. My crotch has been burning for the last half hour. FML I agree, your life sucks 32274 You deserved it 7580 152 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By lft - United States Today, I called over my math teacher to ask a question. I have a really bad cold. I asked him about a problem and he reached over my desk to point at the diagram and explain it. Then I suddenly had to sneeze and I got tons of snot all over his hand and arm. FML I agree, your life sucks 48845 You deserved it 10129 127 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Newville Today, the nerves for my finals got so bad that I started stress-cleaning in my dream. FML I agree, your life sucks 19338 You deserved it 1523 26 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Today, I walked into my house with a couple of friends and I saw my girlfriend doing laundry. I jokingly asked her if she had time to do a load of mine as well. She scoffed and said, "Yeah babe, I'll gladly do your laundry... The same day you learn to wipe properly." FML I agree, your life sucks 25632 You deserved it 54418 116 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By trafficfail Today, as I was driving to work, I glanced in my rear view mirror to see an old man behind me using binoculars to see in front of him since we were stuck in a huge traffic jam. He rear ended me. FML I agree, your life sucks 31676 You deserved it 2804 72 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By anonymous - United States - New Baltimore Today, I found out I have sodium fluoride poisoning. Apparently, my water has a high level of sodium fluorine. I've been drinking much more water lately trying to be healthier. FML I agree, your life sucks 33954 You deserved it 2752 64 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By pat3212 - Canada - Toronto Today, I had to get two teenagers to stop playing bumper cars with the electric scooters at the grocery store I work at. I'm seventeen, and they don't pay me enough for this. FML I agree, your life sucks 14370 You deserved it 1329 37 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FBfail - United Kingdom Today, I saw my boyfriend of two years had joined a group on facebook called 'Guys who are proud of their girlfriends'. I smiled and was about to like it when I noticed a comment below from a girl saying "Awww thanks babe :) xxxx". FML I agree, your life sucks 42553 You deserved it 2985 174 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Why - United States - Marlborough Today, my husband cheated on me. In my house. While I was home. FML I agree, your life sucks 22627 You deserved it 1981 100 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Slovenia - Domzale Grandma rocks! Today, I decided to be nice and pay a visit to my grandma. We ended up playing Scrabble. In between passing wind that smelled like rotting eggs, she kept playing the filthiest words she could, and yelled at me whenever I checked to see if they were in the Scrabble dictionary. FML I agree, your life sucks 40378 You deserved it 5165 61 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ouchiee - United States Today, I sprained my sternum in my rugby match. I now can't yell, laugh, cough, inhale or exhale fully, or sneeze without a sharp pain shooting through my chest. I have a pollen allergy, and sneeze every 5 or 10 minutes. FML I agree, your life sucks 42470 You deserved it 4133 82 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By dumb tourists - China - Beijing Today, a blonde tourist came up to me and asked me for directions to the nearest train station. I politely directed her there, and she left. Five minutes later, she came back and slapped me for not bringing her to an "English-speaking station". We're in China, lady. FML I agree, your life sucks 44822 You deserved it 2923 173 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Cottonwood Today, I was going for my morning walk, when a guy in a massive truck drove up beside me, with a kid no more than 4 riding shotgun. I lost my faith in humanity when his tiny voice yelled through the window, "Nice ass!" FML I agree, your life sucks 45196 You deserved it 5055 165 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By KillMeNow - United States Today, Twilight once again won all the awards at MTV, beating out Inception, Toy Story 3, Harry Potter, etc. This is MY generation. FML I agree, your life sucks 105059 You deserved it 12081 659 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
Today, like every other day for the past two weeks, my husband was not in the mood for sex. He told me this while masturbating. FML I agree, your life sucks 209 You deserved it 23 3 Comments
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me after finding out that I opened an Onlyfans account. FML I agree, your life sucks 216 You deserved it 1385 9 Comments
