By FML Approved - 26/7/2017 14:30 - France - Paris I agree, your life sucks 1178 You deserved it 188 0 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By hurikan68 - 27/7/2010 23:25 - United States Today, I requested two hours off for tomorrow afternoon. My supervisor and manager called me into the office to talk to me about how important it is to be in the office as much as possible. A little later, my supervisor told me that for budgeting reasons, I have to take 3 non-paid days off. FML I agree, your life sucks 27632 You deserved it 2638 52 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By lrn2road - 24/6/2014 15:04 - United States - Sacramento Today, I was screamed at by a lady for riding my bike too slowly in front of her car. I was in the bike lane, and so was she. FML I agree, your life sucks 49346 You deserved it 4513 85 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ponyboy - 22/1/2010 22:41 - United States Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because she suspected me of cheating. She thought I was cheating because she caught me sneaking out in the middle of the night. I was sneaking out to plan my proposal to her. FML I agree, your life sucks 41193 You deserved it 4158 143 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 1/9/2014 02:18 - United States - Bronx Today, while eating cotton candy, a drunk person came up to me and said "HEY! COTTON CANDY!" And bit me. FML I agree, your life sucks 40795 You deserved it 3232 60 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 11/7/2015 00:52 - United States - Las Vegas Today, I finally finished downloading a 60GB TV series after two weeks of waiting. Every single "episode" turned out to be Rick Astley singing Never Gonna Give You Up, on constant repeat. I almost respect the prankster's effort enough to not want to gut him like a fish. Almost. FML I agree, your life sucks 30597 You deserved it 8401 129 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 29/11/2009 06:33 - United States Today, I made out with a guy that I had just met at a party. It was my first kiss. I don't know what's worse, the fact that my first kiss is at the age of 23, or the fact that I saw him making out with a different girl later on in the night. FML I agree, your life sucks 35028 You deserved it 16564 155 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By MouseChaser - 26/11/2009 09:22 - United States Today, I learned that as adorable as it might be to watch your cat follow your cursor around the screen, the humor ends when she dives into and breaks the monitor. FML I agree, your life sucks 11927 You deserved it 28188 55 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Bontempi - 19/7/2012 18:55 - France Today, I returned home to my parents' house, drunk. Hungry, I grabbed a slice of bread and some butter and took two mouthfuls. Five hours later, my mother woke me up and dragged me to the kitchen. In the middle of the table was a buttered, half-eaten sponge. FML I agree, your life sucks 13583 You deserved it 42508 215 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Noname - 15/2/2009 20:28 - United States Today, I was at a fraternity party, and one of the hosts said over the loudspeaker "turn to the person next to you and picture them naked, then drink a beer if the mental image disturbs you". I turned, only to be face-to-face with my ex-boyfriend. He drank two beers. FML I agree, your life sucks 41240 You deserved it 5602 56 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By FennFoxx - 21/3/2017 07:00 - United States - Cheraw Today, I decided to take a relaxing bubble bath in my jacuzzi. I poured in the bubbles, turned on the jets, and got in. I realized too late that the jets had caused the bubbles to overflow and had made a huge mess in my bathroom. Relaxing, indeed. FML I agree, your life sucks 2990 You deserved it 1752 15 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By BigToe - 26/4/2011 16:00 - United States Today, I broke my toe. My mom didn't think it was necessary to take me to hospital, opting to give me some painkillers instead. They were so strong that I fell asleep for an hour during my exam. FML I agree, your life sucks 33416 You deserved it 4057 105 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By mademoiselle meurtre - 13/4/2015 02:51 - United States - Belleville Today, I had to explain to my rabidly religious brother how two transvestites can buy fish at Petco while he's buying the same fish at the same Petco, and it doesn't equate to hitting on him. It's been two hours, and he's still sitting outside my door reading Bible verses and praying aggressively. FML I agree, your life sucks 32026 You deserved it 2821 157 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By SugarCoat - 8/6/2017 18:00 Bastard Bambi busts bumper Today, I volunteered to go get ice cream if I could use my mother's car. She told me to be VERY careful. Not ten minutes later, I hit a deer, which got up and walked off as though nothing had happened. FML I agree, your life sucks 3636 You deserved it 553 15 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By omfgmaya - 5/10/2009 17:29 - Denmark Today, my boyfriend brought me to his place to meet his parents. When they saw me, they laughed. FML I agree, your life sucks 46187 You deserved it 3905 61 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By theflow - 15/8/2012 17:08 - Australia - Perth Today, thanks to a new form of birth control, I've now been having my period non-stop for six weeks. FML I agree, your life sucks 42080 You deserved it 4516 360 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 6/5/2009 15:07 - United States Today, I was giving my friend sex advice when she asked me when was the last time for me. Not only did I lie but I realized that it was in November and the time before that was June. I have had sex less times this year than she has this week. FML I agree, your life sucks 54376 You deserved it 12016 153 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 30/7/2009 09:23 - United States Today, I tried to be sexy and put a condom on with my mouth. Instead, I inhaled it and my boyfriend broke three of my ribs giving me the Heimlich maneuver. FML I agree, your life sucks 25344 You deserved it 59099 134 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 11/11/2012 10:26 - United States - Williamsburg Today, after finally falling asleep, my boyfriend woke me up and got extremely mad at me. My offense? My pillow was touching his side of the bed. After yelling at me, he's now sleeping on the couch, and I'm lying in bed wide awake. FML I agree, your life sucks 26386 You deserved it 3019 140 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By XxespoxX - 11/5/2009 02:07 - United States Today, my Dad took me to a yankee game at the new Yankees stadium. During the 5th inning the camera crew put a man on the big screen. I then yelled out "Look at that ugly asshole!" It was the guy sitting 4 seats to the left of me. FML I agree, your life sucks 10017 You deserved it 101725 210 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 14/6/2019 02:12 - United States - Anchorage Today, I got a targeted YouTube ad that was intended for someone who owns a graveyard plot. Glad to know my watching habits match those of an undertaker's. FML I agree, your life sucks 1264 You deserved it 208 2 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By puppydrama - 30/1/2013 21:05 - United States Today, my dad and his new wife got their wedding pictures done. Out of over 150 pictures, I was only in one. The family dog was in all of them. In the one picture of me, I was holding the dog's leash while he took a dump. FML I agree, your life sucks 40864 You deserved it 2912 78 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Raset24 - 30/6/2016 17:40 Today, it was my last day at my job. My team made a little party for me so they could wish me well and say goodbye, but when it came time for my manager to give a little speech, she couldn't even remember my name. I've been working there for two years. FML I agree, your life sucks 14581 You deserved it 1055 16 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By shyshy96679 - 20/6/2011 22:42 - United States Today, I was using the restroom when a little girl tried to open my stall. It was locked, so she slid under the door and tried to have a conversation with me while I was pooping. FML I agree, your life sucks 45972 You deserved it 3854 190 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By chairlee - 7/11/2009 08:12 - United States Today, I stepped on a piece of glass and sliced my right foot open. Hobbling to get my first aid kit, I tripped and stepped on a pair of heels, and sliced my left foot open. FML I agree, your life sucks 36880 You deserved it 4935 82 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By UnfortunateGirly - 26/2/2010 08:30 - Australia Today, my friends decided it would be funny to yell out "Pass us the bong, Emma!" while I was on the phone to my mother. FML I agree, your life sucks 28159 You deserved it 6338 154 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 10/11/2012 07:23 - United States Today, while at work, a customer gave me a $20 tip. I explained to him we aren't allowed to accept tips, but he insisted. When I called the manager to report it, he pocketed my tip. FML I agree, your life sucks 15400 You deserved it 30183 135 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Margo - 15/11/2011 15:16 - United States Today, my daughter-in-law taught my 4-year-old grandson to burst into tears and yell, "Am I not good enough for you?" whenever I ask her if she's going to have any more children. FML I agree, your life sucks 15217 You deserved it 63895 240 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Roger Quimble - 24/5/2019 00:04 Today, after taking a refreshing shower, I found out that due to a newly-built platform, people in the apartment underneath can see right into my bedroom. While I was standing there completely naked, some guy smiled at me. FML I agree, your life sucks 1782 You deserved it 219 9 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Phazzer - 16/10/2009 13:39 - United States Today, I went outside to enjoy the cool air without my glasses. I saw my neighbor doing the same, so I waved and said hi. When she didn't respond, I yelled and went back inside. It was only later when I went back out with my glasses on that I realized I was being ignored by a Halloween decoration. FML I agree, your life sucks 10455 You deserved it 33575 58 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 12/5/2011 07:54 Today, I got a paper cut from a 'get well soon' card. FML I agree, your life sucks 41410 You deserved it 5667 116 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By twiggy24 - 5/2/2012 02:51 - United States Today, I learned that my "cash back rewards" for credit card purchases are mailed with the monthly statement. The same monthly statement that goes straight into the shredder or fireplace because I prefer to do my banking online. FML I agree, your life sucks 8231 You deserved it 42342 85 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By GyroUpgraded - 20/7/2016 23:03 - United States - Portland Today, after driving to three drug testing clinics that were approved for my job, each one declined me saying they dont do testing anymore. Now I have to drive another 25 miles to see if someone will say, "You're clean." FML I agree, your life sucks 11764 You deserved it 916 27 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 21/10/2013 19:07 - United Kingdom Today, my dad came into my room, looked at my laptop, and said he could hear the porn I was watching all the way from his room. I wasn't watching porn. We soon realised it was actually coming from his mobile phone. FML I agree, your life sucks 59588 You deserved it 4454 87 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Needsanewjob - 10/1/2012 15:34 - United States Today, I guess I accidentally left Facebook open on my work computer while I went to the bathroom, because my boss updated my status to "Unemployed." FML I agree, your life sucks 15448 You deserved it 55216 248 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By meggs2209 - 12/1/2012 20:06 - United States Today, Dell's tech support called to tell me that the laptop I sent to them was going to cost an extra $300 to fix, because of the shattered screen. When I mailed my laptop to them, the touchpad wasn't working. The screen was fine. FML I agree, your life sucks 36813 You deserved it 2935 187 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 11/8/2012 22:22 - Canada - Airdrie Today, I had a chat with my husband, and I convinced him to try being more spontaneous to spice up our sex life. This evening, he burst into our bedroom with an eyepatch on, and "seductively" growled, "I'm gonna slay your pussy, wench." FML I agree, your life sucks 18282 You deserved it 43286 185 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 22/7/2016 22:01 Today, my roommate's boyfriend professed his love to me. I kicked him out, and he stood outside the door calling my name until he saw my roommate coming down the hall. They both came in and he acted like nothing happened. FML I agree, your life sucks 16839 You deserved it 1106 29 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By GoneLimp - 7/3/2017 20:00 - United States - Havelock Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend doggy-style and noticed a piece of toilet paper had been "left behind". I had such a bad internal conflict about whether to tell her or to remove it myself, I went limp. She started crying and accused me of not being attracted to her anymore. FML I agree, your life sucks 8036 You deserved it 1387 17 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 9/12/2012 20:03 - New Zealand - Auckland Today, my doctor finally prescribed me some medication for my arthritis. The cap was insanely well-secured, and my hands were too racked with pain to get it off. FML I agree, your life sucks 31213 You deserved it 1843 95 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By bonzo - 22/6/2015 14:41 - Australia - Perth Today, my boyfriend broke up with me after I drove two hours to his house, because he wanted to do it face to face. Then told me that if I wanted, we could have sex one last time, but I would have to leave right after, otherwise it would be weird. FML I agree, your life sucks 32723 You deserved it 2665 81 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
Today, my husband refuses to have sex with me, ever since I told him I wanted to try for a baby. When I asked him why, he said it was because he likes... I agree, your life sucks 820 You deserved it 1108 14 Comments
Today, my man complained that I was "not easily approachable", sexually speaking. To clarify, his usual way of signalling his desire is to just lie there,... I agree, your life sucks 1158 You deserved it 133 2 Comments
