By FML Approved - France - Paris I agree, your life sucks 1180 You deserved it 189 0 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Decisions6 - Denmark - Aarhus Testing, testing, 1-2, 1-2 Today, my therapist made me take a test to see what level my depression was at. There was a whole bunch of questions with multiple answers to choose from. One question was, "Do you find it harder to make decisions?" I couldn't decide which answer to pick. FML I agree, your life sucks 1441 You deserved it 284 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, my brother thought it would be hilarious to take a pair of scissors to all my bras. My mom can't take me shopping for another three days and I have no one to borrow a bra from. I have school. FML I agree, your life sucks 44126 You deserved it 4359 559 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By whyyjustwhy - Estonia - Tallinn Today, I copied some files to my phone while borrowing my grandfather's laptop. As I selectively deleted the files from the recycle bin, I noticed some pictures, and ended up seeing way more than I wanted to of his erect penis. FML I agree, your life sucks 47900 You deserved it 9859 73 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By leah_kascar - United States - Hialeah Today, in the class I'm teaching, I assigned my students an essay to complete for homework. One student asked me if I was deducting points for bad spelling. I teach English. FML I agree, your life sucks 16931 You deserved it 2351 89 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By al - Canada - Cambridge Today, I had to admit that I hate the wedding dress that I've designed. My wedding is in a week. FML I agree, your life sucks 10050 You deserved it 30484 87 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, my dad spent 30 minutes incorrectly correcting me about our legal system. He thinks he knows more than me because he's been divorced twice. I'm a lawyer. FML I agree, your life sucks 35044 You deserved it 2421 62 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Singlelady - United Kingdom - Stoke-on-trent Today, my sister gently asked me if I was gay. Turns out I've been without a boyfriend for so long that the whole family believes I secretly have a girlfriend. FML I agree, your life sucks 11757 You deserved it 1147 32 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Chandler Today, I hooked up with a girl at a club, and we had sex. She just lay there like a corpse the whole time. It got so bad, I ended up faking an orgasm and blaming the lack of semen on a botched vasectomy. She actually believed it. What the hell? FML I agree, your life sucks 49118 You deserved it 11930 130 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Robyn - Belgium - Stokkem Today, the button on my husband's pants popped for the 4th time. I already used the strongest thread and buttons. He's obviously put on some weight around the stomach, but he won't listen to reason and still blames me for my sewing, which is making his pants "turn against him". FML I agree, your life sucks 22063 You deserved it 1729 66 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By fuck your music - United States - Hesperia Doo doo doodoodoo doo doo Today, I finally got tired of my neighbors constantly blaring their obnoxious rap music all hours of the day and night. Trying to be funny, I put Baby Shark on a loop and turned my speakers all the way up. They called the cops on me. FML I agree, your life sucks 1790 You deserved it 521 10 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By hhaghigh - United States Blending Nemo Today, I was draining the water from my fishbowl out into the kitchen sink. The fish was still in it and decided to go with the flow, literally, right into the garburator. I was too scared to stick my hand down there to save it; instead I panicked and turned the garburator on. FML I agree, your life sucks 373 You deserved it 2392 22 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States Today, I was at soccer practice. The ground's keeper just aerated the field, and my teammates and I decided to throw the cylindrical clumps of dirt at each other. I got hit in the face with one. It wasn't dirt. It was a clump of wet dog poop. FML I agree, your life sucks 50305 You deserved it 13488 52 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By chewybarseventy - United States Today, I came home to see my husband talking to his penis. FML I agree, your life sucks 34354 You deserved it 11026 191 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By no sir I have not - United States Today, I was taking a patient's blood pressure, and listening for his pulse with my stethoscope. I couldn't hear anything, so I adjusted the cuff and tried again. Still no pulse. He pointed out that my stethoscope was the wrong way around and sneered, "You been smokin' the reefer, boy?" FML I agree, your life sucks 15325 You deserved it 36232 120 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Drafrica - South Africa Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in the missionary position. Once again, our cat decided to crawl onto his back and stare at me. FML I agree, your life sucks 40606 You deserved it 5761 77 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Tara - Sweden Today, I baby sat a four-year old kid, because his parents went partying. Once in bed, he yells "I want to go party!!". After 3 or 4 times, I told him to go to sleep. 2 hours later, wet bed. "Told you I want to go potty!!" FML I agree, your life sucks 18943 You deserved it 52164 50 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By wil - United States - Nashville Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "God" told her to. I guess "God" didn't have any problems with me buying dinner first. FML I agree, your life sucks 32354 You deserved it 2819 82 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By francesa_loca - Canada Today, my father started drinking a little early. At some point, he got hungry and decided to boil eggs. He started a dozen, drank some more, and passed out on the couch. When I came home, all the water had boiled off and the eggs had exploded all over the kitchen. I'm still cleaning up the mess. FML I agree, your life sucks 32890 You deserved it 2498 98 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Mentor Today, my daughter got her first period. Nobody was home but my husband. He didn't know what to do, except give her a sponge to put in her underwear. FML I agree, your life sucks 40811 You deserved it 4154 158 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Uh_Oh_Bro - United States - Annandale Today, my family, grandma included, took some time to discuss whether or not olive oil is a suitable substitute for lube. FML I agree, your life sucks 16506 You deserved it 1958 68 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By racking-leaves - United States Today, after spending 3 hours raking leaves, I went to the store to get some supplies. I came back to find my neighbor had decided to blow his leaves all over my yard. FML I agree, your life sucks 23746 You deserved it 1842 90 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By joeheathen - United States Today, I went to the pharmacy to purchase a brace for my sprained wrist. My wife and I had recently ran out of KY lotion, so I decided to pick up a bottle while I was there. It didn't occur to me that these two items could be perceived as being related until the cashier began to giggle. FML I agree, your life sucks 30384 You deserved it 6584 121 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By anonymous - Australia - Mitcham Today, my boss brought his cat to the office. Despite our no pet policy, I still managed to get the blame when the crazy animal scratched 3 colleagues and peed on the floor after my boss left for bathroom. Apparently I was supposed to be "looking after it". FML I agree, your life sucks 31597 You deserved it 2322 45 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 13/8/2020 23:01 Catching up Today, I got a message from my crush, with whom I had a one night stand with a few months ago. I was really surprised and excited to see his name pop up on my phone. Turns out, he only messaged me to accuse me of giving him mono, and then he blocked me. FML I agree, your life sucks 1310 You deserved it 234 3 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States - Pratt Today, I told my boyfriend the dentist said my blood pressure was high. He was more interested in the fact that the dentist took my blood pressure than my blood pressure being high. FML I agree, your life sucks 37427 You deserved it 10677 150 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - 10/11/2020 02:02 Man child Today, instead of being an adult, my husband was more hysterical than my daughter during a hissy fit. It makes me want to divorce him. FML I agree, your life sucks 784 You deserved it 163 4 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - United States What is it? Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML I agree, your life sucks 67849 You deserved it 8180 191 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Today, I had a 10-hour shift that started at 5 a.m. We can't leave until relief comes and we don't get paid for overtime if our relief is late. The good news is my relief came early. The bad news is he went on a smoke break and never came back. They want me to stay until we close and I'm the only cashier. FML I agree, your life sucks 12747 You deserved it 751 76 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By fmylovelife - United States Today, I surprised my girlfriend with roses. She surprised me by getting back together with her ex. FML I agree, your life sucks 44397 You deserved it 3459 110 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Rachel247 - Israel Today, we had a hike at my camp. We hiked in a line. I suddenly felt things hitting me at the back of the head. After a few minutes I finally turn around, only to discover a bunch of older guys throwing tampons at my head. They were my tampons, falling one by one out of my unzipped bag. FML I agree, your life sucks 42272 You deserved it 9968 70 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Today, I am now sleeping on the floor because my friend got super drunk at a small party then peed herself in her sleep. I was sleeping beside her and my clothes smell like pee. FML I agree, your life sucks 2073 You deserved it 220 8 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By youdontknowmewhy - United States - Keller Today, I was called a selfish brat for asking for a pillow as my birthday present. FML I agree, your life sucks 29780 You deserved it 2102 81 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By skinny dipper - United States Today, I was caught skinny dipping by the police. With the arresting officer's daughter. FML I agree, your life sucks 45875 You deserved it 12667 181 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By ssssssssuck a dick, boss - United States - Kalispell I can't help it! Today, my manager took me aside and angrily told me to quit fucking about with our customers. He totally refuses to believe that the slight whistling sound I keep making when I exhale is because I have a chipped tooth. FML I agree, your life sucks 40473 You deserved it 3175 44 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By fecurtis - United States Today, I thought it'd be cool and trendy to buy a Blackberry Storm. FML I agree, your life sucks 7410 You deserved it 37300 107 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous Today, a customer asked if we stocked gluten-free water. Then she got pissed when I laughed at what I thought was her joke. FML I agree, your life sucks 14054 You deserved it 1053 72 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By reedcarter Today, while I was at a urinal, a man came up to use the one next to me. He then said, "I guess this is where all the dicks hang out." He then stared at me until I left. FML I agree, your life sucks 25944 You deserved it 2023 78 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By wannadi - United States - Camden Today, I was told by co-workers with whom I have worked for 2 years that I tan too much and dye my hair black too often. I'm from the Middle East and have never tanned nor dyed my hair. My co-workers think I'm a wannabe. FML I agree, your life sucks 40553 You deserved it 2834 87 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - Canada Today, I was lying on the couch after having surgery on my stomach. My best friend and my mom thought that laughter would be the best medicine. Due to their medicine, I ripped out half my stitches. FML I agree, your life sucks 33815 You deserved it 2567 73 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
By Anonymous - France Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on in a water park changing stall. A woman and a security guard barged in and angrily told us that there were children around. We were escorted out of the park wearing nothing but our swimsuits. FML I agree, your life sucks 8783 You deserved it 74560 284 Comments Favorite Tweet Share
Today, I found out that my boyfriend lied about not only talking to one other girl, but 5 other girls, and it wasn't just talking, it was wanting to meet... I agree, your life sucks 106 You deserved it 16 1 Comments
Today, as my husband normally initiates sex and sometimes I want to but always chicken out, I was feeling brave and did so. After he came, he continued... I agree, your life sucks 569 You deserved it 105 5 Comments
