ZeroZoom

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Zerozoom's favorite FMLs

Opportunist

By Mick - this FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML

agreeclassic 865 438

vote type 1 95 092

By Enyo - 01/01/2013 17:35 - Reserved

Today, I found my dogs freezing outside. My neighbor was supposed to watch them while I was away, and on my way home I called to let her know she should let them have a quick walk. She thought I'd be home soon enough that she wouldn't have to let them back in. It was minus 10°C out. FML

agreeclassic 39 721

vote type 1 4 326

By Anonymous - 18/12/2012 07:48 - United States

Today, I saw a man in an army uniform. As a bit of a patriot, I went up to thank him for his service. After about 10 minutes of me going on and on, he started laughing. He wasn't a soldier. FML

agreeclassic 18 568

vote type 1 29 954

By Anonymous - 15/12/2012 15:55 - United States - Amsterdam

Today, I ran into my infant daughter's room because I thought I heard her crying, and found she was still sound asleep in her crib. The screams were coming from the mouse our cat was using to paint her bedroom walls. FML

agreeclassic 32 022

vote type 1 2 503

By Anonymous - 10/12/2012 20:41 - Canada - Brampton

Today, I had to do a presentation in front of my entire school. I was very nervous, so I used the old trick of picturing everyone naked. Everyone then got a good view of my erection. FML

agreeclassic 40 835

vote type 1 16 791