always_audrey

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A propos de Always_audrey

нey ι'м aυdrey ι love тo нang oυт wιтн мy ғrιendѕ and aм тoтally careғree

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Always_audrey's favorite FMLs

By dannij08 - 14/01/2009 01:05 - United States

Today, I stole one of my cousin's chocolates. I didn't tell her, after I ate it, I read the box and realized that it was a chocolate laxative. I'm posting this from the bathroom. FML

agreeclassic 7 436

vote type 1 43 511

By oh why... - 20/12/2013 14:51 - United States

Today, I got a ransom note saying, "We have kidnapped your husband and won't release him unless you postpone the wedding." The wedding is tomorrow and it was in his handwriting. FML

agreeclassic 55 474

vote type 1 4 496

By _The__Doctor_ - 31/12/2012 22:44 - United States - Venice

Today, my skydiving instructor casually remarked that he wouldn't mind "diving into" me sometime. He was strapped to my back the whole way down. FML

agreeclassic 42 361

vote type 1 3 737

By Anonymous - 16/03/2012 20:23 - Ireland

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated, and he started to go down on me. In excitement, I accidentally drove a knee into his face. No amount of fondling his diddlestick made him forgive me for his bloody nose and swollen eye. FML

agreeclassic 26 807

vote type 1 13 720

By Anonymous - 10/01/2012 06:04 - United States

Today, I found out that when my mom says she's going to kick me in the head to wake me up for an important interview, she actually means it. FML

agreeclassic 17 134

vote type 1 21 545