gr1995

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Gr1995's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 03/06/2015 05:01 - Canada - Lansdowne

Today, I'm warning you: never spoon naked with your girlfriend after eating taco bell. The shartpocalypse just might begin in her ass and end on your stomach. FML

agreeclassic 33 157

vote type 1 4 776

By DUFF - 11/06/2015 21:04 - United States - Harrisburg

Today, I found out I wasn't invited to my neighbor's funeral, with whom I had been good friends with for a long time. When I asked her husband why, he said, "We have a small amount of money and can't afford for you to eat all of the refreshments." FML

agreeclassic 26 403

vote type 1 3 467

By hmdge1 - 10/06/2015 03:21 - United Kingdom - Doncaster

Today, I found out that my boss of 2 years not only doesn't know my name, but calls me "Jew hair" behind my back because of my natural ringlets. This man determines all of my career progression. FML

agreeclassic 26 329

vote type 1 1 890

Made his mark

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - San Francisco

Today, I finally slept with the man of my dreams. After he left for work, I found a six-inch skid mark smack dab in the middle of my sheets. Apparently, the man of my dreams doesn't believe in toilet paper. FML

agreeclassic 29 706

vote type 1 3 385

By Kassutera - 06/06/2015 11:15 - Canada - Niagara Falls

Today, after handing over the cash to buy my sister's car off her, she refused to sign any of the paperwork, and later put an ad on Craigslist selling the same car. I got scammed by my own sister. FML

agreeclassic 32 503

vote type 1 3 687

Kassutera app_comment_confession_title

Kassutera 7

Sunday 7 June 2015 20:59

I will give you an update on what has since happened: The car in question was 1500 bucks and I needed a car badly so I bought it off her and she told me she would give me the paperwork the following day for it. Being she is my sister I trusted her to give me the papers the next day. I happened to browse Craigslist only to find an ad resembling the car I just bought off her with her phone number. I called to see if she could take the ad down because I figured that she put this up before I bought the car when she told me she isn't going to take the ad down and the car is for sale. For those of you accusing of me owing her money...I did not owe anything to her before hand and paid her in full for the car. I had originally given my mom the money to give to my sister so it is not like she cannot say I have no proof the money wasn't given to her. My mom has been on her case about stealing the money and we are still working things out. Will give an update if it does eventually work out.