Andrew King

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Andrew king's favorite FMLs

That one weird kid

By Laura - 27/05/2014 15:58 - United States

Today, at school, I got seated in front of the resident creepy kid that everyone stays away from. I was pretty relieved to get through most of the class with no incidents, until the bell rang and he tore out a chunk of my hair, yelling, "DNA! DNA!" FML

agreeclassic 50 458

vote type 1 4 145

Life insurance?

By Rusty - this FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - New City

Today, I found out that my parents secretly throw away any food I cook for them, because they think I might try to poison them. FML

agreeclassic 28 644

vote type 1 2 792

Know your place

By genderbender - 17/11/2010 01:21 - Reserved

Today, I went to the new gym I recently signed up for and started exercising in the men-filled weights room, despite being intimidated by them and the strange looks they were giving me. Workout over, I left the room and saw in front of me a door marked, "Women's weights room." Oh. FML

agreeclassic 13 971

vote type 1 27 116

By BakedBat - 21/02/2014 04:10 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, I walked into my apartment and smelled something extremely repugnant. I asked my roommate what had happened and she said, "I didn't know how else to kill it!" She'd trapped a bat that was in our apartment, put it in the oven, and set it to 400 degrees. FML

agreeclassic 55 007

vote type 1 4 442

By Anonymous - 27/09/2010 15:58 - United States

Today, I'm a 22 year-old guy with a 11:00 pm curfew. FML

agreeclassic 35 335

vote type 1 16 419